"= yet the curiosity still arises... no, no, i shouldn't even step near the concept. ="
8=l < Is this about culling
"= it is about the thread i was just in, yes. i was going to say as such. but. i figured i may aswell not invite the attention of those who would mess with me. ="
8=l < If the concept is something you want to engage in without commitment 8=l < May I recommend roleplay
"= roleplay like. i mean, i know about, the various kind of -plays there are that could possibly emulate these scenarios, but not many people lean as far into it as i'd like sometimes. haha. i mean, and i assume you mean face to face roleplay, i would not do it over text for reference, i feel like it would just make me worked up. ="
8=l < Yes in person 8=l < There are many kinds of roleplay 8=l < This nature might be seen as sx%001 8=l < But there are groups for larping scenarios that do not involve such depravity 8=l < I was trained by my highers to be a culler before I played my game 8=l < But I was an angry child and w001d have been a poor keeper to the unfortunate soul assigned to me 8=l < It's not a position for the faint of heart 8=l < I support you seeking e%perience in a safe enviornment
"= mmmm, hmmmm, i understand, in a sense. but i expect that, whoever it was who would have been 'yours' would not have got their hopes up for their treatment from whoever, since, they would have no idea who it is and no expectations as such. if i was in their position i know for a fact i would have fought anyone who attempted to be my culler, which, wouldn't end very well i assume. either way, impulsive thought of the night, i have had close calls with the alternian kind of it many times, but never a close call on the beforan kind, and i wonder, how far that sort of thing could be pushed. ="
8=) < You c001d always find out if you bother the right Beforan troll 8=l < There are a lot of different culling practices 8=l < Some cullers are rather benign I've found 8=l < Others a lot less so 8=l < Depended entirely on the culler in question though I found regardless of the motives it was demeaning towards the cullee 8=l < E%cept in rare scenarios 8=l < I w001dn't mind being a culler now knowing what I know about myself and my patience 8=l < But it w001d need to be of my choice to help another in need, not forced upon me by societal e%pectations 8=l < I have a feeling anyone I took in w001d be a brat and try to push my buttons 8=l < Or fear me 8=l < No in between 8=l < And I long tire of being feared 8=l < I applaud you for having the gumption to fight 8=l < But our society w001d have made life very difficolt for you had you done so 8=l < I am glad to no longer be a part of it
"= ah, maybe. i mean, i have been slightly trying to prod certain trolls' buttons myself. open myself up to them slightly, to see if they get that urge, while, simultaneously keeping an eye on them. whether they can see it or not. =" "= ah, so you have still got the urge. that is fine. i still have my own alternian-hatched urges, don't be too ashamed of it. but do understand some trolls find it very funny. =" "= the question is, why are your buttons so pushable? would you allow them to? after all, that is the job of the culler. if the troll's problem is that they push too many buttons, you might need to make them stop doing all that. =" "= hypothetical, obviously. yawn, yes, i have got the idea that it'd be hard already. i described my daily life and thoughts to a beforan-based mediculler at one point and he promptly said i would have been institutionalised upon my first incident, let alone the amount of altercations i've been in since - but not much higher than other alternians :) ="
8=l < What is a button for if not to be pushed
"= hhhhmmmmh. maybe you have some kind of point. but. well. ="