@empyreansApothehosis — #mentalhealth
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- Ɨ |⟨nΩ屮 ♱ⴵ-∊ ΣȺdn-∊ΣΣ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵƗn m-∊ ƗΣn’♱ dƗΣΣȺ♱ƗΣfȺ☪︎♱ƗΩn, Ɨ’m mΩr-∊ ♱ⴵȺn ΣȺ♱ƗΣfƗ-∊d 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ my lƗf-∊, Ɨ g-∊♱ ♱Ω m-∊-∊♱ lΩv-∊ly p-∊Ωpl-∊, Ɨ ⴵȺv-∊ Ⱥ b-∊Ⱥu♱Ɨful mȺ♱-∊ 屮ⴵΩm Ɨ Σp-∊nd -∊v-∊ry nƗgⴵ♱ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ. Ⱥnd Ɨ |⟨nΩ屮 Ɨ♱ ƗΣn♱ Ɨd-∊n♱Ɨ♱y -∊Ɨ♱ⴵ-∊r, Ɨ |⟨nΩ屮 屮ⴵΩ Ɨ Ⱥm, 屮ⴵȺ♱ Ɨ Ⱥm, ȺΣ mu☪︎ⴵ ȺΣ Ɨ♱ 屮ȺΣ pȺƗnful ♱Ω ⴵȺv-∊ gΩn-∊ ♱ⴵrΩugⴵ my lƗf-∊ b-∊fΩr-∊ ♱ⴵƗΣ mΩm-∊n♱, ⴵȺd ♱ⴵƗngΣ gΩn-∊ dƗff-∊r-∊n♱ly ♱ⴵȺn ⴵΩ屮 ♱ⴵ-∊y 屮-∊r-∊ ΣuppΩΣ-∊d ♱Ω, Ɨ 屮Ωuldn’♱ /b-∊/ ȺrȺdym, ♱ⴵȺ♱Σ 屮ⴵy ♱Ɨm-∊lƗn-∊Σ -∊xƗΣ♱ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ dƗff-∊r-∊n♱ vȺrƗȺ♱ƗΩnΣ Ⱥnd Ωu♱☪︎Ωm-∊Σ. Ɨ Ⱥm und-∊nƗȺbly Ⱥ mȺl-∊ ȺmΩngΣ♱ Ⱥ ☪︎ȺΣ♱-∊ ♱ⴵȺ♱ ⴵȺd Ωnly b-∊-∊n 屮Ωm-...Read more
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- [ⴵȺndl-∊ ☪︎ⴵȺNGƗNG!] -- -- [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵ-∊ΩpⴵΩΣƗΣ] ƗΣ nΩ屮 [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵ-∊ΩⴵΩΣƗΣ!] [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[...NOBLE SUFFERER.] -- [EMPYREANSAPOTHORPHOSIS] IS NOW [EMPYREANSAPOTHERPHOSIS!]
[...?] -- [EMPYREANSAPOTMORPHOSIS] IS NOW [EMPYREANSAPOTHORPHOSIS!] --
[HANDLE CHANGING.] -- [EMPYREANSAPTAMORPHOSIS IS NOW EMPYREANSAPOAMORPHOSIS!] --
THERES ALWAYS SOMETHING OF AN ODD GLEE I START TO FEEL WHENEVER I GET TO ENGAGE IN SOME SEMBLANCE OF HUMOR OR AS ITS CALLED.. 'SHITPOSTING' MAYBE ITS BECAUSE I GET TO FEEL SOME SEMBLANCE OF WHAT IT WOULD'VE BEEN LIKE IF I HAD GOTTEN THE CHANCE TO ACTUALLY EXPERIENCE CHILDHOOD. ..I THINK THIS JUST MEANS I WOULD'VE BEEN A TOTAL SHITLORD HAD I NOT GONE THROUGH WHAT I HAVE. #MENTALHEALTH?
SOMETIMES IM LEFT WONDERING ON IF I AM STRONG ENOUGH TO PROTECT THOSE AROUND ME THAT I HOLD DEAR AND IF MY SELF-WORTH IS TIED ONLY IF I HOLD THE GREATEST RESERVES OF PHYSICALITY AND STRENGTH. I MEAN SHIT, I HAD BEEN CONDITIONED INTO THAT FOR MOST OF MY LIFE. BUT I OCCASSIONALLY QUESTION ON WHEN I WILL EVER GET A CHANCE TO BREATHE, FROM ENDLESSLY CARRYING THE BURDEN OF SUCH. #MENTALHEALTH
SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT DESERVING OF THE GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO ME DESPITE THE FACT THAT I DO. I WISH I COULD FEEL LIKE I'M DESERVING OF THE PEOPLE AROUND ME, BUT I DONT. BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I HAVE ANY OTHER WORTH BESIDES JUST BEING STRONG, I WANT DO MORE FOR THEM YET I FIND MYSELF STRUGGLING TO NAIL DOWN A INTEREST THAT I TRULY ENJOY, ITS LIKE A CONSTANT FEEDBACK LOOP OF THINKING I DONT DESERVE MY MATESPRIT, TRYING TO GET BETTER AT OTHER SHIT SO THAT I FEEL LIKE IM BRINGING MORE TO THE TABLE THAN JUST "BEING STRONG KILL GUY" AND THEN FINDING MYSELF MORE AND MORE LOST. #MENTALHEALTH
SOMETIMES I SIT DOWN AND I HAVE THE CRIPPLING REALIZATION OF THE FACT THAT FOR MOST OF MY LIFE I WAS TREATED LIKE AN OBJECT INSTEAD OF AN ACTUAL PERSON. AND BECAUSE OF THAT, I TAKE WHAT SEEMINGLY WOULD BE SURFACE LEVEL DECENCY AS GESTURES OF INCREDIBLE GENEROSITY AND ANY SORT OF KINDNESS I CLING TO LIKE A RAFT IN A HORRIFIC SEA-STORM AS IF I WAS GOING TO DROWN. #MENTALHEALTH