Good lord. Right then. Since several curious fellows here have demanded my scholarly opinion on the cultural phenomenon known as "yaoi," I suppose I ought to give the matter a fair examination. Can't very well call oneself an explorer if one refuses to march headlong into unfamiliar territory. From what I've gathered, yaoi concerns itself with romance between chaps. Not quiet romance either. Everything is painfully dramatic. Every glance carries enough tension to snap a bridge cable. Every disagreement feels like two doomed rivals squaring off atop a cliff during a thunderstorm. Extraordinary stuff. The thing that strikes me most is that realism hardly seems to matter. Emotional intensity is the true objective. One constantly encounters dangerous looking blokes with tragic pasts glaring at each other while rain pours down around them. Some poor devil grabs another by the wrist as though letting go would result in immediate death. Half the time I cannot tell whether they're about to kiss or duel. Often both. After reading several examples, I realised the structure is rather similar to the old pulp adventures I adore. Only instead of cursed temples and lost artefacts, the danger comes from unbearable romantic tension. Same atmosphere. Same peril. Different jungle. One fellow says: "I cannot be with you." Which usually translates to: "If you continue standing there looking handsome, I shall lose my bloody mind." There are patterns to the whole affair as well. The cold aristocratic type. The reckless brute. The quiet intellectual standing near a window looking devastated for reasons nobody fully explains. Everyone appears terminally exhausted and emotionally compromised. I will say this for the audience. Tough bunch. They willingly consume stories designed to emotionally destroy them. Betrayal. Longing. Heartbreak. Tears in the snow. Love confessed moments before catastrophe. And they come back for more. In conclusion, I began this investigation deeply confused and slightly alarmed. Now I mostly find the whole thing fascinating. Yaoi thrives on excess. Grand emotion. Desperation. Beautiful fools making their lives infinitely worse because they refuse to admit they are in love. Honestly, I can respect that. #yaoi #iguess
