♦ pitied by @metamorphicExaminer
+[U] ... Okay-sure-I-don't-like-that-but-sure.
+[U] holding-your-hand.
+[U] We-cleaned-out-the-rest-of-my-old-boss's-office. Completely-unrelated,-we're-having-a-bonfire-and-burning-shit.
0kay n0 hes fine Funeral 0rgy has been re-cancelled #nsfw
+[U] your-hands-
+[U] rock-paper-scissors-gets-complicated-when-your-moirail-has-6-fingers.
[TAPING A PI#TURE OF ME BOOTY NAKED TO A MOU$E TRAP, $ETTING IT OUT ON THE FEED AND WAITING IN A BU$H 🪤🪤...🌳🌳🍀🌲🍃🍃🌳 ]
b♤d news: i ♤m going to run out of kupo nuts...
♤s it turns out, it is ♤ good thing i woke up ♤s e♤rly ♤s i did tonight. kupo-mom h♤s visitors.
+[U] WELL-DONT-DO-THAT.
+[U] I'm-going-to-grab-a-fistful-of-chest-hair. And-rip-it-out.
+[U] Your-tits-are-too-big. Get-them-out-of-my-FACE.
>> ડeemડ your opt¡onડ are to e¡ther get b¡gger or make them,, ડma11er..?
+[U] My-matesprit-and-moirail-are-taller-than-me,-more-muscular-than-me,-and-have-bigger-chests-than-me. Lowkey-annoyed. :/
+[U] It's-why-I-hate-it.
+[U] I-hate-this-mug.
SOME TROLLS WILL REALLY LOOK AT MY PROFILE PICTURE AND MY QUIRK AND MY PROFESSION AND STILL WONDER WHAT MY WHOLE DEAL IS. ISN'T IT ♣️OBVIOUS♣️?
+[U] As-nice-as-it-would-be-to-live-closer. Scary.
+[U] We'll-find-out-in-a-few-minutes.
+[U] lol,-thanks.
+[U] i-need-a-specific-badge. 2 badges. gonna-learn-how-to-draw.
+[U] The-agency-reopened-for-regular-operating-hours. Immediately-flooded-with-cases. Ah. Sigh. Yeah.
+[U] Very-inconvenient.
+[U] I-kinda-wanna-move-in-the-middle-of-buttfuck-nowhere,-but-I-kinda-like-having-a-short-commute. And-sleeping-in.
+[U] You-and-I-both-know-we-can't-say-that.
D --> My secretariat often criticizes me for getting distracted D --> I hired her specifically to keep me in line D --> To ensure that I am not swept away by every little mention of a hoofbeast I see D --> It is not my fault I grew up an appreciator of fine art D --> And that I have the Empress given ability to recognize prized material when I see it D --> She does not allow me to decorate my office the way I wish D --> She says having depictions of refined and elegant genitalia from the humble hoofbest arranged one by one betwi%t photos of my own is undignified D --> I wish for my office to be like the story by famed author George Orewell, Lusus Farm D --> Wherein they 100ked from hoofbeast to E%emplar, from hoofbeast to E%emplar, and back again D --> And realized there was no difference D --> Unfortunately it is like George Orewell's other novel D --> 1984
+[U] I-can't-judge. Given-what-I-am.
+[U] Fair-enough. At-least-you-aren't-dead.
+[U] I-assume-it's-cause-you-live-in-evil-incarnate-wasteland.
+[U] damn-he-talks-more-than-i-do.
xx_I_GOT_TICKLE_ATTACKED_NEXT_THBAGTS_SO_FUCKED_UP_AND_EVIL_CHCHOW_BARELY_SURVIVED_xx
im a manipulat-r but i can make my face l--k like a ":3" s- i think that negates all my red flags
+[U] Yeah. He-was-a-creep.
ST-P PITYING ME Y-U'RE SUPP-SED T- LAUGH
+[U] Going-through-the-previous-boss's-things-and-finding-loads-of-weird-shit. 😬
---- |oh I don't know what most of those words mean| ____
:33 < oh my god. :33 < this one's asking what i've b33n thinking :33 < mewr the most relatable purrson on chittr meow!!!
I aam so tired, I wish someone would give me aa maassaage for aa chaange. I wish I could give myself aa maassaage without lifting aa finger, I heaar I aam pretty good aat it
+[U] No. Lol.
oh, no no, no flarp, a plain ol' human. narrowly avoided a heatstroke, so i'm just kinda resting right now, can't do much. what about you?
I kknew the riskks going into it, but oh deaar, if I aam not going to be aa little bitch aabout it
+[U] Everyone-wants-to-date-someone-taller-than-they-are. I'd-have-settled-for-someone-shorter. I-don't-like-being-picked-up,-but-it's-what-I-signed-up-for,-I-fucking-guess.