[[Volunteer Helpsman KALIEN DALZIE; Designation - Unit 74; Experimental Contact]]
WHY W0ULD Y0U D0 7H47? 1'M H499Y! 1 4M 4 V0LUN733R, H3L91N6 70 90W3R 83F0RU5! 1 4M H3R3 8Y CH01C3!
[[Message redacted.]]
1F 1 H4V3 61V3N 7H3 1M9R35510N 7H47 50M37H1N6 15N'7 R16H7, 9L3453 D0 N07 H3517473 70 C0N74C7 7H3 R3L3V4N7 4U7H0R17135!
1F N07H1N6 15 7H3 M4773R, 7H3N 9L3453 D0 73LL M3 480U7 Y0UR D4Y! 8)
[[Questions? Concerns? Need to report an unhappy Helpsman? Contact your regional ruler!]]