♦ pitied by @turnedtechGod
► ERROR: CRASH REPORT. JUNIOR.EXE IS NOT AVAILABLE. ◄
I KNOW I'M SUPPOSED TO LEAVE THEM BUT I KIND OF DON'T WANT TO.
Coughs into my fist. No real trigger warnings. #death mention, #heroxvillain, #yearning, #worldbuilding, #yaoi #tetrotoxwrites Deadly fog has become an unpleasantly common phenomenon in your life. Your rival—a human man with snow white hair and all the readability of an uncarved, water-smoothed rock—has a telltale signature in poison. Primarily in highly toxic gas that you, as-of-yet, cannot find the origin of. It continuously changes in both toxicity levels and the exact structure, but the consistency lies in a few things—in particular that it’s incredibly dangerous. This, of course, is what put him on your radar to begin with. An attack on a government facility marked by countless deaths with very little direct violence. Still, you don’t think their deaths were all that pleasant. When you had arrived, the fog had been so thick inside the building that seeing more than a few feet in front of you was a pipe dream. You only caught a glimpse of him at the time. Sharp and vicious. Back straight, laser-focused. There was something in it you couldn’t quite place at the time. Now, you know it to be conviction. A refusal to bend. It’s…more attractive than you’d like to admit, even though you have no idea what it is that he believes in so strongly to motivate him to such lengths and the crimes he commits. Unfortunately, though, the man himself is just attractive in general—something reinforced by the fans he has despite…well, everything. Something something, the things people will blind themselves to for an attractive man. This, of course, isn’t remotely the point. Your mind has drifted far from the mission at hand, which has you delving once again into the thick of it. As one of the few people actually capable of going into it risk-free (mostly), you’re usually the one to handle him in these scenarios. Which have been popping up with increasing frequency. You kind of like to think he’s using the gas more so he can discourage other heroes and law enforcement from trying to capture him themselves, but you also kind of like to think that he wants to kiss you. … Okay, maybe you aren’t that much better than his fangirls. But you tend to only dwell on all of that late in the day while wondering if you’ll catch wind of him while you try to fall asleep. You’ve lost a lot of sleep over him—both because of having to chase him during the day and because of your own roaming thoughts. You want to know him. You want to understand him. But he never lets you close like that, and you understand why. At best, this is pitch to him. At worst, he despises you and not at all romantically. But something in the red quads, be it flushed or pale, is just…out of the question. You’ve thought about both. Maybe vacillated a little. But that’s for you to know, and you alone. Sometimes, though, you think about how he looks at you when you could capture him but you let him slip away, and you wonder if he knows something. Wonder if he feels anything about it, somewhere in his pumper—in that human heart of his. This time, as his eyes meet yours, is the same as all the last. You receive no answers.
I know some of y’all probably think by now that I just treat the bad shit as a joke, but I’d like to point out that one of *my* memories got put up. Take it as the hint it is. Some people cope just by forgetting. Some people cope by pretending they can’t be hurt.
The fatigue is hitting. Blood sugar is low.
Alone.
I am the afterthought.
Yes.
I apologize Dave, I am not doing well at the moment.
You may have fun, it was mostly my interactions that made me disappointed.
I imagined the beach would have been fun, but it was just disappointing as usual.
I am not happy.
This is ridiculous. I was trying to post at work and they cut off my service. I suppose I can't have anything, then?
no da fuckkk i cant bottlin fuchsia rage up is dangerous af bro
ᡕᠵデᡁ᠊╾━_ >wh0
Haha, holy shit, I got trauma beam'd.
𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚋𝚎𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚝𝚘:@takeTetrodotoxin You wake in pain, like you always do. You are alone, like you always are, now. You haven’t decided if you prefer this over being poked and prodded at constantly. It’s not that they don’t do it anymore, just that they can’t do it freely. You sit up and swing your feet over the side of the bed. Your chest aches. Your joints. You hurt to the bone. The reason why they don’t just walk in anymore surrounds your feet, and you kick at the air a little, watching how it stirs up the denser gas around the floor. It’s a deadly toxin, and you have been a living bioweapon for six months. You know they’re already weaponizing you even though they aren’t done. The gas can be drained from the room and utilized. Especially since it will suffocate you the way carbon dioxide suffocates a normal human. You’ve been isolated to a separate wing of the facility due to your condition. You are seventeen years old. You are a weapon, an experiment, but you were almost a person. Almost. It, like everything else, was taken from you. And it, like everything else, was not something you let go easily. The door opens. You are dragged out. You are used to this, and shake off their hands by the time they get you into the hall. You can walk fine on your own. You are taken to a barren room. You have seen it before. You do not like this room. You intend to forget this room. You are thrown inside. The prisoner, maskless, comes next. They were told that killing you would spare their life. This was a lie. You think they know that, too. Your not alone, you are just like me. (#horror #human-experimentation #dehumanization) 𝙼𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚏𝚒𝚗
It's such a pain in the ass.
Uuuuuuuugh. I've got another fucking media appearance next week. Come on, man, I have an actual fucking job.