HOW DID I BECOEM A DAD? I WAS IN MY MUM'S YARD, MOWING TEH GRASS (SUCH A DAD THING!!!!! CUTTING GRASS1!!! A SIGN!!!), WHEN A SPAEC ROCK FROM SOACE FELL DIRCETLY ON MY HEAD NEXT THING I KENW WHEN I AWOKE FROM MY COMA WAS THSG MUM'S HOUSE WAS RIBBLE (MUM WAS SFAE1!!!) AND A BABEY WAS MISIDENTUFIED AS MY SON1!!! I HAVE NO WIFE!!!! THAT WAS WHEN I KRNW IN MY HEART OF HEARTS THAG MY ACCIDENTAL SON WOUDL BECIME MY ON-PURPSOE SON!!!!!! WITHT THE INSURNAVE MONEY FROM MY MUM'S HOUSNE, I MVOES US THREE OFF THE GRID SO THE LYING GOVERNMENT COUDOTN FIND OUT THE TRUTH ABOUT MY SPACE SON11!!! HE HAS GROWN UP SO GOOD. VEYR SMART. VERY ARTFUL BRAIN WITH MANY TALENRS. HE KNOES SO MUCH ABOTU COMOTUERS, LIKE HOW TO MAKE COLORUS AND SHAEPS. HE MADE THE COMPTURER SING1!!!1 I LVOE MY SON!!!!!!
T... TWO SONS...? I WOULD BE HONORUED BERT. @uninspiredandTalentless MEET YOUR NEW BROTHR
you know hes a moon truther right not like "we didnt land on the moon" like "the moon is a hologram invented by NATO to hide the existence of vampires"
NO1 THE MOON IS A COMPUTRE RUN WITH FVAMPIRES1!!!1 THE VAMPRIES ARE INSIDE THE MOON!!!!!! IT IS HOLLOW AND THE VEMPIRES ARE INSIDE DOING SCIENVES