#karkitreviews
MOVIE REVIEWS PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN 4 AN INSULT TO THE PREVIOUS THREE LACKING NEARLY ALL THE CHARM AND ALL THE COMEDY. WENT "HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT" A HUNDRED TIMES OVER. CONSTANTLY TRYING TOO HARD. AS ALWAYS THE ONLY SAVING GRACE IS THE MAIN ACTOR. GOT BORED HALFWAY THROUGH AND STARTED PLAYING A MONOTONOUS VIDEO GAME ON THE SIDE, AND HALF THE WATCH PARTY GOT WASTED. 3/10, WOULD RATHER WATCH LITERAL PAINT DRY. ADDED A POINT FOR EACH OF THE ACTORS I LIKED.
MOVIE REVIEWS: TOP GUN: MAVERICK I CAN APPRECIATE GOVERNMENT PROPAGANDA WHEN IT'S DONE RIGHT BUT EVEN I WOULD CALL THIS A FUCKING JOKE. MAVERICK, MORE LIKE DISHONORABLE DISCHARGE TAKEN BEHIND THE BARKBEAST SHED. ENJOYED IN THE MOMENT BUT OVERALL A MID WATCH. 3/10 #KARKITREVIEWS
MOVIE REVIEW IN WHICH A SPIRALING KISMESITUDE LEADS TO THE SANCTUARY OF OFF PLANET COLONY PLANETS, WHILE THE PROTAGONIST SEEKS HERSELF OUT THROUGH UNIQUE AND HUMILIATING CHANGES IMPOSED ON HER BY AN UNFAIR GOD, AND EACH CHANGE CAUSES AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS IN HER AS SHE QUESTIONS IF SHE IS STILL THE SAME TROLL SHE WAS WHEN SHE LEFT. SHIP OF TROLL THESEUS BUT IF IT WAS A PERSON. I'M NOT A FAN OF HOW MUCH THE PROTAGONIST HAS TO SUFFER BUT THE PAYOFF WAS WELL DONE. HER KISMESIS SHOULD BE OUT DOWN BEFORE SHE HURTS SOMEONE ELSE. 6.5/10 #KARKITREVIEWS
MOVIE REVIEWS LITTLE MONSTERS SHIT. FUCK YOU EGBERT/10