♠ hated by @carcinoGenomicist
ok man
women rolls my eyes
louder and right
yes
shut up
hovering my talons over the block button
rust slurry flavored ice cream #nsfw
hiighly recommend vencord, the2e 2iick af theme2 are 2o fuckiing cool
hhrmrhmm.. ill be offline for a good wwhile https://i.postimg.cc/QdN0gtfC/image.png
i'm so mad i can't lactate #nsfw
she's gonna hate me one day haha
would life be better if you did
rechitt
it means i love youuuu
feeling extra self destructive today
wouldn't have done it without you <3
svweet tat dudeski.
made myself some vwicked fanart since none of my fans do it for me. as you can see, im laying dovwn vwith my tvwo main gals bettie and sherry. #fanart #theycantresistme #bettiepage #sherrywvalance
.webp)
I think we sh9uld all 6e nicer t9 each 9ther.
gayyyyyyyyyyy
i just felt my counterpart grab the knife i'm trying so hard not to laugh
wrong
i'm kind of a biiiiiiitch
we're going long sleeves and pants in the middle of summer babyyyy
complicated
wish they didn't make my head hurt so much love them though
me when i have an army of ants
i'm going to kill somebody #violence
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/90b4f7f601e8.jpg
think i mightve pissed someone off a little
dncjskkzmzmnwn
Awful timing.
Bec, I would like to let you be aware you made me break my comically large coffee mug.
I'll admit, I'm nervous at once.
Meowth, all im saying.
Ok, I gotta hold myself together and absolutely not tweak out at what's going on its a really #vaguepost and I truly am #fond of what's going on. ~^..^
i'm not serious ever btw don't get involved with me
these hoes ain't loyal lmfaooo
lmfao jasp wasn't wrong there they go
yall sad ass striders could never be me i'm walking on sunshine in this bitch metaphorically of course don't got legs lmao
baby had her first fumble in almost 10 years lmfaoooo
checking my new badges
holy shit i just came back are we talking about pokemon
talonflame for me btw
i would say i'm cooler than all of you but then how would i be hotter lmao
smash or pass me
i know it's all smash btw
i’m so fucking happy i got freed let’s gooooo
holy shit holy shit hahhahaaa
god he's cute
end times are near. #vwherearemypictures
my ass hurts.
congrats, that's really cool of you! not sure what that has to do with me though. :B
i just realized a "bucket list" is way different for trolls than it is for humans. #suggestive
Not very good at flirting, are you, Vantas? Are you expecting me to come sweep you off your feet? :::;)
Nope, I was testing you. Wanted to see how serious you really were. And wow, you are! You're desper8, hahahahahahahaha!
My massager mmmmmmmm.
Who want me? ::::)
light player girls are riding my ass for my #ableism #sex post not being medically accurate :'(
this is an astonishing fucking revelation
can’t talk in the bathtub
what you said is funny
ha haha
no you don’t have to im grown
mb
it was so based everyone's a hater
ok check this shit out [a video is attached. the setting is empty road lined with guard rails and trees, perched on the side of a hill. rose swiftly backs away from the camera, mounting a dingy old bike and testing the pedals. she manages a wheelie, going "yooo" and showing off before promptly crashing into the guard rail and tumbling down the hill offscreen. all that's seen for a solid minute is the bike laying on the ground before a scratched up rose covered in bracken staggers back on screen, holding the camera and uttering "based" before the video ends.]
lifting weights because i have no body mass
oh well who wants to see me do a wheelie on this bike i stole
ok senator hotness of beautytown wtvr u say
babe corner.
coming mom
ha lost a tooth
we were having fun as fuck ignore the hat @carcinogenomicist https://i.postimg.cc/zfcfdkzg/img-3427.jpg
hahaaa nice you're right ok
this guy was bullying me so i grabbed you
D --> Now you know how it was to be me
I am employed, I manage the finances for Troll Hot Topic. I usually just don't need to leave my or my partners place when I do.
#wetwife
I AM SO F*CKING COLD.
i'm so tired but i'm so comfy
alone
Ah Ragebaiting Vantas Does Have Its Moments, Perhaps Serket Was Into Something
Sure, Let's Go With That If It Makes You Feel Better Meanwhile Me And My Partner Will Be Spending More Time Together. And My Sex Life Is None Of Your Concern, Id You Wish To Ask Her About It Though Your Statement Will Be Proven Incorrect
What A Thoughtful And Creative Insult I'll Be Sure To Be Wounded By That Whilst Sobbing Into My Partners Arms
Ah Yes, How Silly Of Me Why Don't I Vent All My Thoughts On The Timeline To Cause Drama Leaking All My Secrets And Pain Seems A Great Way To Become Popular
girl i'm bored let's get rabies
You better leave out milk and cookies for the Hatman
dude the hatman is approaching
The Hatman is en route.
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 6: alternian vwantas #notgay #nsfwv #nsfvwe #dubcon #misogyny #abuse #casteplay #hemoism #cagttl hear me out. infinite timelines infinite possibilities. and in many of them karkat is a hot babe. there are a lotta iterations, im gonna default to using the name kat, because thats the cutest nickname for her. this is *not* about dudekats, okay? this is about bbwv cutie mutie tsunderes. thats vwhat vwere here for, okay? this is some rule 63 shit. is that problematic to say? ehh wvhatewver. vwere gonna talk about hovw to get into the swveatpants of a girlkat. first order of business: if she aint at least curwvy, back off, iwve newver seen a skinny kat vwhos up for anything. youre looking a girl wvith meat on her bones. chubby cheeks too, preferably constantly blushing wvhenewver you say anything to her. if she starts on a super long and gross rant before you ewven start touching her up then shes probably a lost cause. vwhat wvere looking for is the sorta vwindbag wvholl say a lotta nothing and get herself vworked up, but doesnt actually argue vwith anything you say. she might evwen be outright flattered but tell you to piss off anyvways. dont let up. kats are usually pretty receptiwve to the wvombo combo of feeling em up vwhile wvhispering all sorts of swveet nothings in her ear at the same time. makes em melt. on that note, some of the adwvice here is similar for vwhat i said for aradia. kats a mutie, bright red blood, spoiler vwarning, sorry. makes her the perfect sub for some casteplay. pretty much all of em are secretly into it, sometimes so secretly evwen they dont knowv about it. say enough about like, their bodys real purpose, or hovw theyre meant to serwve highbloods, or vwhatevwer other shit pops into your pan, and shell be all yours. this gal is total cullbait, in the beforan sense, obwviously. shes wvound all nice and tight, she just wvants to be taken care of. i dont wvanna giwve eridans too much credit, but you see that one pic of a kar and eridan floating around, the proud grub raisers? yeah, thats basically any girlkats vwet dream. shovw her you can giwve that to her. okay, but vwhats your in? wvell, theyll tolerate more than youd expect, because they cravwe material to insult you ovwer. be unashamed, be seedy, let her get comfortable. she already assumes youre a loser, dont dissuade her of that until its too late. no one really listens to her yap, so you gotta pretend to listen. maybe giwve her an honest compliment about hovw clewver she is, as honest as you can manage anywvays, that alvways kills. she knovws her team doesnt respect her. be the slightly older masculine figure that showvs her respect, and listens to her, and thinks shes so cool, and oop youvwe got your hands up her svweater and shes ready to say please. [my legal team redacted parts of the next para, im vworking on rectifying this wvith em] novw uhh, this last bit, dunno if i can ewven say it. like, legally speaking. just... karkats tend to havwe some █████ ████████████ vwith ██████. you can use that. this comes up like, a lot vwith karkats. its the ████ ████ as the █████ █████, shovw her ████ ███ ██████ ████ ███ ██████. shes ███████ █████ ███████ ████, make her ███ ██ ███. shes ███████ ██ ███ ████, make her feel good, make her ██████████ ███ ██████ █████. shell be so much happier ██ ███ ███████ ████ ████ █ ████, ██ ███ ███████ ████ shes your girl. a collar goes wvell vwith any girl, ███ ████ ████ ██████████. ███ ███ ██ ███ shell be in lovwe wvith you forevwer. cutie mutie ratings bod: the good ones are alwvays chubby. not alvways my thing, but damn she makes it vwork. they dress frumpy too but again, she makes it wvork. a kat in leggings alvways gets me. 8/10 vwvwariety: as much as i enjoy her, youll go owver the same beats again and again. theyre fun beats, but like... i dunno, if more of em could yap this wvould be higher. 7/10 ease: holy shit for all her posturing shes the most sensitivwe troll there is. one touch and shell wvanna fall to her knees. 10/10 personality: get some earplugs. absolutely adorable, and i lowve breaking dovwn the angry types into blushing ingenues, but it can still be a bit much. 7/10 owverall: 8/10. for all my nitpicks, vwhat i am really complaining about? girlkats a busty mutant vwith a fat ass and loads of hemospectrum related issues that you can svwoop in to exploit. alwvays a rare treat.
god you are just so romantic how did i bag you
i reaaaally like you btw like like like you btw
i wanna compare us to animals all of them
best girl i've ever met @carcinogenomicist hey
if we were dogs she'd be a grey shetland sheepdog and i'd be a rat terrier if we were cats she'd be a norwegian forest cat and i'd be an oriental shorthair if we were birds she'd be a raven and i'd be a crow if we were bugs she'd be an orchid mantis and i'd be a praying mantis if we were fish she'd be a black betta and i'd be a red honey damselfish i bet there's more
...I really miss him. #vagueposting
at the beach with my girl
i think she would look great in green though
you know why i'm doing it
hey back off man hahaha
@carcinogenomicist
damn she's pretty
carving pretty patterns because what does it matter haha bars #cw-self-harm
yeah is that so?
youre even prettier B)
Aye, well, if that's the case, I'll have some fine liquors with your name on 'em when you don't have cold walkfronds.
And what's exactly stopping you? ,'::::/
Gr8! Thank you for sneezing pure Colum8ian cocaine onto me, this will certainly 8ring me joy and whimsy now.
Literally am the Rizzler. The Rizzly 8ear. Rizz Khalifa. Chuck Norizz. Sir Rizz-a-lot. Rizzy McGuire. The Rizzard. The Wolf of Rizz Street. Ron Rizzley. On that Quantum Rizzics.
gurt: yo
yknow what yeah actually i’m fine with that
Yeah, I'm just gonna skip the semantics and just 8ag you instead then.
Even 8ETTER!!!!!!!! Oh come on, would you at least do it for what the humans call, a "Scoo8y Snack"?
i’m gonna be goddamn augustus gloop with how i’m gonna be all up in that coffee man
Want me to change that? I'll definitely start asking JUST for you! >::::)
yep and i’m ordering something *extra* complex from you
Yeah, now you're just making me wanna order something complex from you 8ro.
#yum
promise?
I WILL HIT. ON. EVERYONE. I don't give a FUCK what they are! Some cosmic horrorterror, some imperialist scum8ag, a fucking AI ro8o-8a8e, or even a gogdamn FELT (though, I gotta 8e REAL drunk for high for that one pro8a8ly). There's veeeeeeeery few who I wouldn't hit on. Do not test this.
alright bet
oh yknow a hairstyle
Thinking of upgrading my arm more. Hmn........
the hell is tiktok even about man
ok but you would miss out on the fun of being a naked beast
hmm, it might be a problem wvith the cut, rather than the size. you oughta post pics so i can noodle that out.
Y'know, if you're ever mad or salty........ Ever just thought a8out NOT 8eing mad or salty? Heard that tends to help.
ok im getting bored of this bit and chittr with a red ui look's weird to me im too used to the green
cause i have a love for science.
General Hospital.
hey, science is romantic.
bill nye the science guy.
fair response! but i'm wounded, karkat. you've wounded me. what the fuck, dude. :B
_ I've seen tHe odd poetry on Here, and I try to sHare facts wHenever possible. However, it's Hard to sift tHrouGH all tHe complaininG. _ THouGH, tHis post tecHnically contributes to tHe problem.
no, i think the7 just do it sometimes
alright, in *my* defense... i'm usually not the guy people call in when it's time to crack the bit. which! i still take tremendous offense to, by the way! you're looking at a potential comedic genius here. in another life, i've got my own netflix special and at least three middling stand-up tours under my belt. but it is what it is! i'm not the bit-maker. i'm the guy who gets irrationally invested in the bit once it's already in motion. :B and right now there is no bit. so i’m doing what any responsible bit enthusiast would do: standing in the back of the room and passive-aggressively nudging the bit-makers toward competence!
BLAH.
If I was a horse I'd say shit like neigh and whinny probably
and if i said im crazy and youre all my puppets wwhat then
the goop
there are a(tuall7 a (ouple o((asionall7
something about today's dash is significantly sloppier than usual. c'mon, guys. what's with all the slop? where're the funny hahas and shit? the faux pizazz? this is just lazy! even the horny posters are phoning it in today. for shame, chittr. for shame. :B