♠ hated by @carnifexTerminator
Let's arrange 1t then. Hmu. 1t's not everyday a guy l1ke me gets a chance to gaze upon a majest1c hoodbrast w1thout compare
Qu1te the oppos1te. Follow closer. My hand 1s 1n need of hold1ng.
I'm not wvasting my efforts on finding someone not wvorth my time.
COME TO FELT MANOR. WE'VE GOT RUSTBLOODS. SPILLING OUT OF EVERY HOLE.
aNYONE ELSE DRINK ICE COFFEE STRAIGHT FROM THE CARTON (YES carton BECAUSE i DON'T SPEND MY 'HARD EARNED' MONEY ON AN EXPENSIVE DRINK WHEN i CAN SPEND A COUPLE BUCKS ON LIKE. fIVE DRINKS)
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 19: alternian milwves #milf #nsfwv #nsfwve #dubcon #misogyny #abuse #cagttl so heres the thing about the wversions of me and my crewv wvho grevw up on alternia. theres like, a couple dozen of me, a dozen meenahs, and then like... a handful of the others, thats it. so im gonna bunch em all together in one big batch, wvell see hovw it goes. i dont hawve an awvful lot to say about most of these gals, but like... god damn. wve lovwe us some milwves. damara, the handmaid. depending on, either shes lowvkey chill wvith it, or you need to look at the damara part of this guide. shes a scary gal, my adwvice for those is to treat it like youre facing up a cholerbear. showv respect, no sudden movwements, but no fear either. compliment her, objectify her, but dont go in for the kill unless youre sure she vwont rip your head off. i havwe the luxury of already being dead, i can push these things more. due to her serwvitude to the wvhite guy, handmaids tend to come hardwvired for obedience, you can do something vwith that. bod: 10/10. rusties are hot, shes got damaras face but shes usually got some actual meat on her bones. mines an exception, but shes cute anyvways. vwariety: 7/10. one of the more vwaried outta this group, anyvways. shes got twvo wvhole personality possibilities! ease: 6/10. depends on her mood and howv scary she feels like being. personality: i prefer damz, and yes @handmaid i count you more as a damz than a handmaid. thats a compliment, take it, youre more interesting than most of these hags. owverall: 8/10. hot as hell, fun to mess wvith her head, but nothing special. shout-out to the one fucked in the head enough i put her under wvith just a massage and a couple of choice wvords. next up, meulin, the disciple. ehh... see her around sometimes, hard for me to get a read on her. shes like... a more chill vwersion of meulin? shes dating some cult leader so theres a cheating angle sometimes, but it usually doesnt come up. in my experience theyre looking to be someones kitty cat, but she has a bit more fight in her than most leijons bod: 7/10. nevwer really got a consistent read. usually more lithe outta the milvwes, but still a milf. vwariety: 3/10. theyre just samey to me, the fevw out there run together. ease: 7/10. tends to be easy to flatter, enjoys the attention of a younger fella, it vwont be hard. personality: 6/10. wvhats there to say? shes meulin but quieter and fewver mental issues. ovwerall: 5/10. honestly i tend to skip these ones, just aint my thing. dunno vwhat it is, i just dont vwibe wvith her. up next, porrim the dolorosa. oh honey. her personality is milf. thats it. she wvants to mommydom or mommysub. nurturing? boring. bod: 9/10. platonic ideal of a milf. wvariety: 3/10. shes a milf. ease: 9/10. remind her that shes a milf and shell drop em. personality: 3/10. vwhere? owverall: 5/10. a real nothingburger. youll newver meet one vwho doesnt just vwanna smother you wvith her tits and call you her svweet little thing. great if thats your thing, but... i prefer it wvhen porrim has a brain and personality, if you could believwe it. #feminism #malefeminist latula, neophyte redglare? that sounds fake and made up. probably dommy but likes ropes? literally newver seen one. stick wvith terezi. nowv heres a juicy one. aranea, mindfang herself. a lot more like vwriska than rae rae, superficially anywvays. a lot of these tough gals are paper tigers, but i dunno if ivwe evwer met a mindfing wvho folded. if youre gonna shoot for her, i think you gotta accept that being vwith a pirate means some pegging. shes fun, shes clewver, shes got jokes, but... eh, just hope shes in a mind control kinda mood so you dont evwen hawve to wvorry about messing up. bod: 7/10. hot pirate babe? tits and ass like an 8? its wvhat you expect, though honestly she runs leaner. wvariety: 4/10. shes got too defined a role to do anything else. ease: 3/10. oh yeah, shell make you vwork for it. at least to top, if youre pathetic and cute enough shell bottom, but lets be honest, if she wvanted to do that shed just be vwriska. personality: 5/10. she sure is wvriska vwithout the interesting bits. owverall: 4/10. maybe id respect it more if i found any that gavwe me good banter, but like... im dualscar junior to them, shes aranea senior to me, vwe just aint compatible and thats okay. /\/\/ /\/\/ alright and thats all the alternian wversions of my friend group! not gonna do the beforan wversions of the other gals, not enough meat on them bones, best i got is i made a nepeta mantle muckrake once, but- vwhats that? vwhats that sound? oh cod, oh shell no... tuna in next time to learn hovw evwen a stupid chud like *you* can bag the condesce hershelf! (you probably vwont, but i could and thats vwhat matters)
Hm. No. ^v^ - Your Couturier
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 18: meenah peixes #nsfvw #nsfwve #dubcon #misogyny #abuse #cagttl vwevwe cum a long vway, huh? this isnt the end, but this is a milestone. last of the main girls. mostly. but id only call one of the upcoming milwves "main" so meenah gets the honor of being a soft finale. nowv i knowv vwhat youre thinking, cronus, doesnt meenah hate your guts? and yeah, youd be right, she hates your guts too. but that dont stop me from tapping. itll probably stop you, but if you followv my adwvice maybe youll havwe a shot. so heres the thing, i hawve an unfair advwantage. i mean, obvwiously, im hotter and funnier and more talented than you, dear reader, but im talking the name. cronus ampora. a not insignificant number of meenahs seem to think vwere supposed to be best pals. maybe theyre projecting the erifef crackship onto us? evwen if she dont like me, and she dont, shell giwve that relationship enough wveight to put up wvith me. she tends to be susceptible to flattery, but pretty self-avware about it, so dont lay it on too thick. make her vwork for it, make the compliments feel earned, ewven the back-handed ones. the pitch angle is a good one to wvork here, evwen if you dont plan on taking it all the wvay to the end. novw you vwouldnt think it, but most the meenahs iwve come across hawve a wveird sorta honor code. they make a deal, theyll stick to it. youll see a lot of em making shitty bets, or maybe letting you buy her for the night for some gold, or something like that. definitely try to svwing that to your fawvor, if you get a chance to svwindle her into agreeing to do something for you, do it. she also tends to be a bit of a paper tiger. she might growvl at you for being a prick, for hitting on her pals, but shovw some spine, push her back, maybe yank on one of those braids, and she wvont knovw vwhat to do. shes used to getting her wvay all the time, so dont giwve it to her. one angle iwve usually found successful vwith her is talking about wvho else youre banging. make her curious, make her go "theres no vway aranea let you hit," then showv her hovw it is. novw, this requires youvwe already taken the advwice in some of the prevwious parts, but cmon, if youvwe gotten this far youwve bagged at least someone, right? i mean, vwhat are you, gay? stupid? but yeah, get her jealous, get her feeling protectivwe, for some reason a lotta them really get defensiwve ovwer fef. iwve gotten multiple meenahs to be all like "ugh buoy if you leawve her alone ill let you hit" and then i go to tovwn. anywvays meenah if youre reading this me and damara sawv you from across the bar and wve really like your vwibe final reefiewv bod: usually a total wvashboard but ivwe seen a fewv that can get pretty curvwy. tend to be bottom-heawvy though. makes up for it vwith the energy she brings. 6/10 wvariety: hmm. i think theres a pretty good mix. you alvways gotta wvork at least a little vwith her, and its different ewvery time. the banter tends to be decent and the gap betvween boss beach and bubblebutt slut is alwvays fun. 8/10 ease: not for the faint of pusher. shell make you wvork for it, and unlike a lotta these girls, theres no guarentee youll actually get anything outta her. you gotta lock in to wvin her ovwer, vwhich aint a bad thing necessarily, but she aint usually a quickie. 4/10 personality: so shes a bitch, obwviously, but... i dunno, she tends to be the only gill to keep hating me a bit evwen if iwve got her in bed. that does something for me. i guess this score also wvaries depending on howv badly shes misusing aawve. wvait wvho said that? 8/10 ovwerall: 7/10. shes a bit of a vwhite vwhale, but the catharsis is newver quite wvhat you built it up to in your head. i lovwe a gal vwith braids to pull, shes alvways fun to trade insults vwith, but... being a total bitch cuts both wvays. alwvays glad to sea her but i rarely seek her out. that said. me, you, damz. vwibe. call me.
H(o)n3STly, If I fInD S(o)m3(o)n3 funny 3n(o)ugh, I D(o)n'T kIll Th3m! I mIghT br3ak an arm (o)r rIp S(o)m3ThIng (o)ff, buT y(o)u'r3 fr33 T(o) g(o) If y(o)u g3T m3 T(o) laugh! If y(o)u g3T m3 T(o) l3T a h(o)nk (o)uT AND laugh, Th3n I'll punch y(o)u anD l3T y(o)u g(o). :o) #vI(o)l3nc3