:33< two peopurr have asked so here they are mewre horoscopes fur today :33< ♈ mew desrve all the love in the world... take it by furce :33< ♉ mew n33d to drink more watpurr if mew dont mewll dry up like a rasin :33< ♊ beclawme the purresedent of chainsaws right away! :33< ♋ we all know what mew did... FESS UP! :33< ♌ yestpurrday was bad do betpurr today mew furkup! :33< ♍ vile plots are against mew sniff them out or be destroyed :33< ♎ mew should listen to weird als "thats mewre horoscope fur today" today :33< ♏ k33p that vile plot of mewrs undpurr wraps virgos onto mew! :33< ♐ mew should go to the cluuuub!!! :33< ♑ mew should be in 3 purrlaces at once its a great purrlan! :33< ♒ mewre gonna be the like 25th doctor on doctor who purrpare fur this role by destroying trashcans with a screwdrivfur :33< ♓ we all know mewre good at throwing tridents but have mew tried bidents?
:33< mewre talling meow latula snuck into mewr own house and ate mewre snacks? :33< this is a serious crime kankri
:33< so mew mean to tell meow :33< that mew at no point :33< had a little snack? :33< a little treat fur kankri last night?
:33< AHA! :33< mew clawnfessed then!!! :33< self care is impurrtant!
Sigh. 6aseless accusati9ns... I was just at h9me nearly all last night 6ecause I didn't want t9 6e near the gala... 6ecause I d9n't like cr9wds. And y9u accuse me 9f a thing I never did...
:33< that was a tactic to make mew clawnfess to nyat taking care of mewrself by having a little late night treat like mew deserve!
:33< furiendly remindpurr that my horoscopes are just as real as all horoscopes :))