Whoops. Ive been away for a minute now. Anyhow psa completely unrelated to my absence: do not eat unidentified fruits you find growing near your home no matter how appetizing they look or else youll end up *very* ill!! Evil temptation!!

i just dont believe you when you say it isnt your experience cuz i mean look at you bro youre the kind of guy to walk straight into traffic and somehow every car crashes into each other but you come out unscathed endurance my ass youre blessed by a damn angel
This is a lot gayer sounding than i think you intended but sure! Maybe ive got a little luck on my side. Youve gotta give it to me though endurance is a big part of it when ive been fooling around in the jungle my whole life.

Admittedly yes... it was very yummy!

what part of that sounds gay literally at all in any way? enlighten me mr bootyshorts since you seem to know everything about being homosxual and ok yeah i guess i can give you credit for the whole jungle thing but that doesnt negate the fact that you are the luckiest person ive ever seen
You just talk about me with such passion sometimes it really reads as admiration. I must be blessed by an angel huh? Also the booty shorts in question would be a real sorry pair since theyre more mid thigh than anything but either way a good pair of booty shorts doesnt make a man gay. Be more open minded davey come on!

hey quit it with the cute nickname now youre making it gay and ok the booty status of your shorts aside theyre still tight enough to give your ass a nice lift so i feel like that counts for something in terms of gay factor also maybe its admiration or maybe its envy you dont know and youll never know
And youve been... *adjusts spectacles and checks notes* staring at my ass? Should i assume thats what youve been doing to give me such solid feedback on the matter?

it bounces when you walk so its natural that my eyes would drift down there when youre tally ho leading the charge in front of me it looked at me first
Okay man i really dont know how you want me to take this other than you admitting youve been ogling my backside.

i just said it looked at me first