My secretary did not, in fact, show up. He has been summarily fired. I am in business for a new assistant. Work hours and pay are standard, but open to negotiation based on experience and enthusiasm. Please forward all resumes to my inbox; candidates will be reviewed on a first-come, first-serve basis. ...Preferably someone without odd fixations on the equine, this time?
Lots of paperwork. Taking inquiries in my stead, filing and categorizing incoming intel, &c. You may tag along whenever the gig requires a smidge more elbow grease, so some training in strife is ideal. You'd functionally operate as my right hand man and partner in crime, or lackthereof. :B Just to be clear, this position does NOT involve horseplay. I'm looking at you, Strider. Quit snooping through my ads and pick up my cornsarned calls.
The federal minimum wage is 30¢ hourly. I'd negotiate up to a dollar, though, if you play your cards right.
Hmmm, tempting offer but I think I'll stick to my freelance business, besides I get clients that pay 1000 times what you offer and best part? All I gotta do is kill a few things.
You know, it takes some gall to march into a detective's inbox and confess to a crime. Why don't we discuss this over a cuppa?
Oh please, it's not like I go around killing innocent folk, I mostly kill demons and cultists trying to do some fucked shit, besides maybe offer some pizza and I might accept.
Now you're starting to speak my language, keep talking my language and maybe I might consider your offer to talk.
It sounds like a very interesting 8uisness opportunity. It is unfortun8te I wont 8e a8le to make the commute, I'd 8e more than interested in doing some secretarial work.
I'll be sure to contact you if a remote opportunity arises. Thank you for the interest, Ms. Serket.
Of course, Detective Crocker.