>be me >wake up from an early daylight attempt at conking the fuck out >immediately realize the late-nite ecosystem can be weaponized to my advantage >nobody conscious enough to give a fuck is awake enough to judge the shit iβm about to unleash onto the timeline >i'magenius.jpeg >anyways calling upon all tyrians to treat me like a disposable digital body bag >address me like iβm a particularly premium high-voltage slab of meat one electrical incident away from combusting outright >tfw the internal charge has reached critical mass and i need to RRELEASEEEE #nsfw
>do you have any conception of how long itβs been since i last had any ass >no >you donβt LOLOLOL >the magnitude of my pailing-related suffering could outclass the most melodramatic tortured fic writers of the last millennium with contemptuous ease >entire epics could be penned about the catastrophic drought iβve endured >thereβs more pink glowing off my screen every time i log onto this godforsaken website than there is circulating through the veins of the fine-ass ancient corpse currently masquerading as the empress herself >bless her horrid fucking soul >ONE of these royal babes needs a little petplay action >and i am LEASHED
>as the greats foretold >NEVER FOLD >the stocks must continue SOARING >TO THE FUCKING MOONS >standards are just another volatile market asset and not to tickle my own taint here >(but absolutely to tickle my own taint LOLOLOL) >my portfolio remains consistently over fucking performing >i am a precision-engineered instrument of major genetic loads and psionic arrogance >a highly specialized organism built from equal parts PAIL DEMON and also chud deity >point me toward the poor sluts arrogant enough to test the theory and i will fuck their LIVES up LOLOLOL
>KEEP LETTING THE FUCKSTRATION MARINATE >my method is entirely pencil-pusher proof >i possess a strain of vernacular so irredeemably fucking pandead itβll short-circuit your grey matter on contact and leave you irrationally invested in hearing me continue spewing increasingly stupid horseshit while you bounce on it with extreme prejudice LOLOLOL
>sliding into my mentions is the exact kind of tactical error that eventually escalates into sliding into my dms >followed shortly thereafter by me sliding into you LOLOLOL >mfw the method has been perfected >thanks for your service as patient zero babe LOLOLOL
>FUCK YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE SEDUCED IT DIDN'T WORK >im ending it tonight idgaf
>you made a low-effort typo because of some perfectly normal circumstance ranging from a brief lapse in frond-globe coordination to autocorrect sabotage to even just general visual encumbrance >i make typos because i am operating under levels of horniness so catastrophic they occasionally cause me to blackout >the struggle is unimaginably real LOLOLOL
>being a supreme handler of bitches itβs admittedly a little humbling to admit iβm getting my bulge-tip teased by a complete stranger on the internet who for reasons beyond mortal comprehension is actively allowing me to get away with being generally fucking unbearable >like bruh >IM IN DANGER LOLOLOL
>firelord spitting heat at me >mfw i'm not entirely sure she's ready for the full system shutdown she's about to catch just from trying to bruise my hips while i bruise the fuck out of her nook lining >you're lucky the timeline is watching >these lame ass fucking losers don't deserve to see the full extent of how i'm about to rock your shit sideways LOLOLOL
>suggestion so fucking sweet i almost wish youd begged for it LOLOLOL >you know where to seek this out if you really want it babe