you'vE bEEn conditionEd to bEliEvE that apologiEs arE an admission of guilt and malicious intEnt, rathEr than owning up to a mistakE that you'rE looking to movE on from?
Perhaps because you feel invested in what you associate with the apology. Whether it is an ego that so proudly defends itself and bruises when it has to relent, a problem I frequently encounter, or a sentimentality associated with such gestures that you know will eventually be betrayed.
My own, personal guesses, I suppose.