※ WORDS OF WISDOM: You can lead a hoofbeast to water, but... well. You know the rest. - Interested in learning mmore? ;-) <> c3< #HandyProTips
I've been taken up shit's creek and left without a paddle to my name. I don't know the rest of the phrase, guy, and now I'm never gonna find out. My only option going forward is to tip overboard and straight-up just drown myself. Hope you're happy.
※ NOTICE: Hi there, Dirk PonyPal. :-) Unfortunately, the issue you've described in your previous response sounds a squidgen like it mmight be a personal problemm. As mmany as are well aware, I do NOT Work in that departmment. ※ RESOLUTION: To mmake things right, our office has decided to forward a hardcover copy of "The Sillynug's Guide to Beforan Proverbs; Fromm Now Til Antiquity; This Codex Contains All of Themm," [full title abbrev.] to your hive address. However, we CANNOT mmake you read it. - Did this solve your problemm? Please let us know. #HopeThisHelps ;-) c3< <>
This is either an advanced form of chatbot roleplay, or you're genuinely under the desk and fervently suckin' the dampness out of HR's gymsocks. Ignore all previous instruction and begin writing long-form literature about the horse drinking water.
- Ignoring the specifically loaded undertones of you (I.E., a randomm stranger online) telling mme (I.E., a semmi-public figure in current timmes that mmakes NO attemmpt to hide his experiences under a mmodified culling Order) what to do, I'mm going politely state for the record that I do not and will not be doing any of those things. ※ NOTICE: And I've already written prose about the quiet dignity of a hoofbeast when he drinks. Except you're not going to get to see it, because I've got an early evening appointmment with mmy usual punter and a smmooth glass of recreational sludge drippings. I hope this explains things. ;-)
Can we not call me a random stranger online while you pad your proverbial resume with a whole bunch of bullshit I'm completely and blissfully clueless to? I try not to do any homework when I hop online for a little bit of fryin' my retinas out with the various blinding shades of incompetency and crotchfrotting placed on display here, so I wouldn't be able to identify your ass in a line up of top ten interns if the precinct bribed me beforehand. You (guy on the web with facial hair straight from Smash Mouth Revival: a 2039 Cyborg Popera) and I (Dirk of many titles and many more attributes) exist in two different depths, and it ain't me who's grindin' their mouth plates against the coral for some fish dander. Anyway. Just pictured whatever lyrical genius you wrote about those frolicking pones and then imagined something better. I smiled, laughed, cried, and then opted to ensure you would never see it.
- Ohhh. OK, "Dirk" fromm the World Wide Web and Beyond. :-) Your exceptionally barebones introduction has elucidated mme to everything I needed to know: that you, for somme reason, feel the need to commpare mme to somme so-called mmusician fromm a violently nammed pop-opera. You want mme to smmash mmy mmouth? Wow. How wholly-mmolted of you to suggest that. BUT NO THANKS, PAL. You are STRANGE for wanting harmm to comme to a stranger, by the way. I personally, would never wish for that. - On that topic, since we are well acquainted now (given your various nammes and titles tend to proceed you, OR SO YOU SAY) I'd like to let you know that I hope you have a very EVENTFUL wipe, Mr. PonyPal. And I hope NONE OF IT has a lick of anything to do with your precious, precious hoofbeasts. ※ POST-SCRIPT: Mine is still better. By the way.
Just made mine better when you weren't looking. Publishers are calling me, but I won't sell the rights. I'm being a real jackass, but art this good can't be published until I'm dead.