BATTER UP < YOU MIGHT HAVE HEARD RECENTLY THAT I, BATTUR RUNMAN, HAVE BEEN INVOLVED IN A LITTLE SCANDAL AND HAVE BEEN ASKED BY MY LEGAL TEAM TO MAKE A STATEMENT REGARDING IT. LAST WIPE, A FAN APPROACHED ME AND ASKED ME TO SIGN THEIR VINTAGE BAT - AN HONOR FOR ME, TO SEE SOMEONE SO ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT THE SPORT, WHO IS ALSO A FAN OF MINE. OF COURSE, I SIGNED IT WITHOUT HESITATION. HE RAN OFF. LATER THAT DAY, WHILE ON A LONG WALK I ENCOUNTERED THIS FAN USING SAID BAT TO PLAY, I BELIEVE IT WAS CALLED "CRICKET". WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? FIRST OF ALL, HARDLY EVEN A REAL FUCKING SPORT. SECOND OF ALL, IT'S NOT EVEN THE RIGHT FUCKING BAT? SO, LET ME TELL YOU, THE FURY THAT I FLEW INTO UPON SEEING HIM USING THAT PRISTINE BAT FOR SOME UTTER BARKBEAST SHIT, IT WAS WARRANTED. IT WAS NECESSARY. AND HONESTLY, I SHOULD BE THANKED FOR THIS. ANYWAYS. I'LL BE BENCHED UNTIL MY COURT DATE IS OVER. FUCK. #VIOLENCE > HOMERUN
its okay battur!! you did the right thing!!
BATTER UP < I KNOW I DID. BUT UNFORTUNATELY "THE LEGAL SYSTEM" DOES NOT SEE THINGS THE SAME WAY. > HOMERUN
agents of the slaughter spheres all of them! >B(
BATTER UP < HOLY FUCK. HOLY FUCKING FUCK. MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. BIG SLAUGHTER SPHERE IS USING ITS DASTARDLY FUCKING AGENTS TO HOLD ME DOWN. IMAGINE HOW MANY BALLS MIGHT GET THROUGH. HOW MANY PEOPLE MIGHT RUN THE BASES. HOW MANY PEOPLE MIGHT *GULP* REACH HOME FUCKING PLATE. I'M SHAKING. OH FUCK. OH FUCK. > HOMERUN
I always knew my idool is based!