♣ mediated by @bunkbedJunction
i wvoke up this morning wvith a bad hangovwer and my penis vwas missing again this happens all the time its detachable this comes in handy a lot of the time i can leawve it home wvhen i think its going to get me in trouble or i can rent it out wvhen i dont need it but novw and then i go to a party get drunk and the next the morning, i cant for the life of me remember wvhat i did wvith it first i looked around my apartment and i couldnt find it so i called up the place wvhere the party vwas they hadnt seen it either i asked them to check the medicine cabinet cause for some reason i leawve it there sometimes but not this time so i told them if it pops up to let me knowv i called a fevw people wvho vwere at the party but they wvere no help either i vwas starting to get desperate i really dont like being vwithout my penis for too long it makes me feel like less of a man and i really hate to hawving to sit dowvn ewvery time i take a leak after a fewv hours of searching the house and calling ewveryone i could think of i wvas starting to get wvery depressed so i vwent to the kiewv and ate breakfast then as i wvalked dovwn second awvenue tovward st. marks place wvhere all those people sell used books and other junk on the street i sawv my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster owven some guy wvas selling it i had to buy it off him he wvanted 22 bucks but i talked him dovwn to 17 i took it home, vwashed it off and put it back on i wvas happy again, complete people sometimes tell me i should get it permanently attached but i dont knowv ewven though sometimes its a pain in the ass i like havwing a detachable penis #lyricsposting #nsfvw