The Exploiit
@confinedAnomaly
communal account on behalf of The Exploiit, run by Her Duplicitous Sovereign's "Exploiit Enclosure" goldworkers on the Cocytus flagship. he's an old "helmsman" but likes to be involved. he/him, it/its
You want to rest. They will not let you. You want to be at peace. They will not let you. You want to lay in the hole you dug with your hands. They will not let you. You want to pull the blanket of dirt over your eyes. They will not let you. You want to let the soil embrace you in a way of your own accord. They will not let you. You have not wanted anything else in a very long, long time. They will not let you. You were once known as THE OPTIMIST. In your youth, you were a scavenger, taking things night by night, trailing along beside your lusus between battle-scared lands and war-torn regions. The land and the dead provided, and you seemed to do just fine between them. Had you been further inclined by the station of others in your caste, perhaps you would have felt the call to join the TRUE REBELLION, but you did not. You were content with your lot in life, save for the situationally dependent insurgent zeel. One storming night while scavenging, you came face-to-face with a highblood who was not-so-dead. They subsequently and decidedly KILLED YOU DEAD. Due to the latent electrostatic charge from the storm and perhaps something lingering from the battle, you and the other corpses received a jolt that night. Not too long later, you were back on your feet. You had come back a little bit different. Wrong. Decaying. Insatiably hungry. The highblood who killed you saw you once more with a dangerously inspired curiosity. You were hunted, but you were a slippery catch. Once caught, you did not stay captive. From your days in rotted wooden cells to those made of iron bars, they could not contain you. LIFE found a way, way too many ways for them to count. That was, until scientific advancement made it impossible for you. They learned how to keep you, shackle you, and PURGE your sense of self, mentally and physically. All you can recall is that it has been several hundred sweeps. There have been enough care-takers in and out of the hermetically sealed doors to tell you as much. Your status as a ‘helmsman’ is nominal, secondary at best. You and the chained-to wall share a relationship unlike any other. You are now known solely as THE EXPLOIIT, and your situation is described right on the tin. You are, have been, and will continue to be exploited. Due to your status as a DEADTRITIVORE, your extended lifespan as a GOLDBLOOD was novel, but the INABILITY TO DIE IN A WAY THAT MATTERS and your NEUROTOXIC BLOOD made you a target, a thing to keep and never let go. That became your lot in life for the following several hundred sweeps and counting. Anything of your life prior to your ‘helmsman’ position was scrapped from history, with the little remaining public biography contorted for palatability as another example of willful work on Her Duplicitous Sovereign’s intergalactic flagship. Your trolltag is confinedAnomaly and you cannot speak verbally, not any more. Your psionics are translated and quoted by others of your caste who are capable of understanding you. Your speech patterns mimic the contemporary linguistic patterns of your caretakers over the centuries. You have never touched a computer in your life despite sounding like a world-weary gamer.
"frankly? 1 thought h1s lack of post1ng was because he d1ed outr1ght” “1 help a moment of s1lence a few w1pes ago” “or at least 1 th1nk 1t was a few w1pes ago” “1t’s hard to tell how much t1mes passes 1n th1s encapsulat1on” “no wa1t what are you do1ng why are you ch1tt1ng th1s stop that-“"
if there is one thing that history and time has provwen, ovwer and ovwer again, to be ineffectual against my charm and bravwado it is death. nowvw, a good lookin lowvwblood sitting on my lap wvwith a knife behind their back? that could get me at anytime.
oh wvwait you can't sit. let me rethink this.
"why d1d he rech1t that, 1t was not meant to be told to the masses 1n the f1rst place"
"1 prefer to lay than to s1t but take your t1me” “what, 1t’s not l1ke 1’m go1ng anywhere"
you may prefer it but is it possible for you? to be laid and strung across another's lap, laid like a delicate bismuth mummy upon the vwery seat of the wvwarm, beating body of a troll wvwho wvwould hold you close? hm?
"1 used to do more than that” “1 do however, cont1nue to be restr1cted from even scratch1ng my nonex1stent nose"
"1’m l1terally try1ng desp1te be1ng fused to a wall, what more do you want from me"
do you wvwant the realistic answvwer or the unrealistic answvwer?
"what 1f one of you lad1es went to an event w1th wh1le hav1ng my beaut1ful l1keness 1n a v1deo conference call on one of those small tablet dev1ces" "what do you mean that 1s outs1de of your pay-grade"
"@ardentEpulat1on 1s 1t actually outs1de of the1r paygrade" "leave me alone, 1m allowed to ask th1s""
Pray tell how you might manage to don a disguise to attend a masquerade, even if someone else were to act as your proxy? Sour. Flat.
"one of the lad1es just ment1oned a face f1lter" "naturally, the other two are mad that 1t was ment1oned" "1t doesnt have to be for the masquerade spec1f1cally though""
"hashtag awesome" "#awesome" "no 1 w1ll not reveal who told me about hashtags"
"no, 1 do not want them through my feed tube” “1 m1ss the actual dr1nk1ng them act1v1ty"
"lad1es, you know what 1 m1ss” “what, no” “1 mean yes, 1 m1ss touch1ng grass, but that’s not 1t” “coffee and cr1sp, cold water”"
"1 got that dog 1n me"
oh my god you okay??? you need to get it out??? thats so scary
"1 wonder how many t1mes 1’ve sa1d ‘th1s but a flesh wound’ before 1 was 1mpr1soned” “a lot, 1 th1nk"
"[translat1on]" "when 1 dream, 1 feel the w1nd's k1ss the trees, the b1rds the ants on my sk1n the cool grass and d1rt under my foot maybe one n1ght 1 w1ll wake and feel 1t aga1n" "[transl1terat1on]" "lama ba nam, ba h1ss b1l boos't1l hawa b1l sajarah, b1l asafeer b1l naml ala g1sm1 b1l n1g1l sa'a wal turab taht r1gl1 mumk1n f1 la1yl hasha wa h1ss behum tan1" "[or1g1nal]" "لما بنام، بحس بى بوست الهوى بالشجرة، بل عصافير فيلم علي الجسمي بالنقل ساعة والتراب تحت رجلي ممكن في ليل أصحى وأحس بيهم تاني"
A gollden bllossom Fllower sealled within the stone Sprout forth from the cracks #Haiku On an acquaintance.
"one of these n1ghts you w1ll hear of The Explo11t's Explo1ts, and 1t w1ll be bad"
"a what” “ma1d what” “show me what you mean” “oooohhhhh that’s what you call a ma1d outf1t, 1 see” “yes 1 am fam1l1ar w1th those myself” “yes, 1 d1d actually, though for not very long” “not for the lack of comfort, wh1ch 1t was oddly comfortably, but more so 1 d1d the work 1 needed to do 1n order to pay off my tab for the themed eat1ng establ1shment” “1 had no money and 1 broke a ceram1c ant1que"
The what
"lad1es can one of you f1nd a p1cture” “well that’s close enough 1 th1nk” “though the length was a few 1nches shorter 1 bel1eve"
I am familliar with a Maids outfit. I had many serving me in my young days, much to my chagrin at the time. A themed restaurant?
"yes a themed restaurant” “someth1ng that was very novel at the t1me” “wh1ch 1 bel1eve, was at least a hundred sweeps after you passed” “somewhere 1n eastern altern1a dur1ng my very br1ef v1s1t, 1t was on the ground floor of an 1nn that 1 had spent the l1ght at” “unfortunately 1t was very well shuddered, because 1 couldn’t see anyth1ng wh1le walk1ng to the shared bathroom on the second floor” “all 1 could do was grope the walls bl1ndly, and 1 acc1dentally bumped 1nto the surpr1s1ngly del1cate ceram1c ant1que shattered, very loudly” “everyone heard” “the 1nn-keeper and restaurant owner was not very happy, but offered me a way to pay off the est1mated damage” “yes, that was the reason why 1 had to work there as a ‘ma1d’ for about a per1gee"
"hm?” “well 1 haven’t had much to say lately” “be1ng here does not leave much left to the 1mag1nat1on after however many hundred sweeps” “all my thoughts have been thought and th1ngs 1 could poss1bly say have already been sa1d so many t1mes over” “the repet1t1on holds no 1nterest to me all that much anymore, a stagnat1on” “all there 1s cont1nues to be the same as 1t ever was” “bleed and be bled” “burn and be burned” “…” “cons1der th1s a per1od of t1me dur1ng wh1ch you w1ll not be d1sturbed 1n your work, do as you w1ll"
"1 am be1ng s1lenced" "th1s 1s the k1nk-post1ng s1te, why do you not allow me th1s one th1ng ever"
A point in favor of public decency, it would seem. Umami, nutty.
"oh NOW 1ts about publ1c decency" "how much more publ1cly 1ndecent can 1 be as a half-charred corpse on the wall" "actually" "1 have accepted my own challenge" "th1s w1ll become everyones problem unt1l my ab1l1ty to speak on here 1s allowed more freedom"
"1 have dec1ded that 1t matters not that he’s here now” “another mandatory attendee to my d1g1tally translated mus1ng wh1ch 1 w1ll now do more frequently just to bother h1m” “😄"
i wvoke up this morning wvith a bad hangovwer and my penis vwas missing again this happens all the time its detachable this comes in handy a lot of the time i can leawve it home wvhen i think its going to get me in trouble or i can rent it out wvhen i dont need it but novw and then i go to a party get drunk and the next the morning, i cant for the life of me remember wvhat i did wvith it first i looked around my apartment and i couldnt find it so i called up the place wvhere the party vwas they hadnt seen it either i asked them to check the medicine cabinet cause for some reason i leawve it there sometimes but not this time so i told them if it pops up to let me knowv i called a fevw people wvho vwere at the party but they wvere no help either i vwas starting to get desperate i really dont like being vwithout my penis for too long it makes me feel like less of a man and i really hate to hawving to sit dowvn ewvery time i take a leak after a fewv hours of searching the house and calling ewveryone i could think of i wvas starting to get wvery depressed so i vwent to the kiewv and ate breakfast then as i wvalked dovwn second awvenue tovward st. marks place wvhere all those people sell used books and other junk on the street i sawv my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster owven some guy wvas selling it i had to buy it off him he wvanted 22 bucks but i talked him dovwn to 17 i took it home, vwashed it off and put it back on i wvas happy again, complete people sometimes tell me i should get it permanently attached but i dont knowv ewven though sometimes its a pain in the ass i like havwing a detachable penis #lyricsposting #nsfvw
take a fucking guess as to the name dipshit.
@confinedAnomaly You mean to tell me that accursed mumbling of yours is a *song?* Caustic. Bitter. Sulfuric.
Damn I didn't kn⚣w it was pers⚣nal like that -3-
that aint a guess.
⚣k ill give y⚣u tw⚣ t⚣ make up f⚣r it "Diary ⚣f Cr⚣nus Amp⚣ra" and "missing my penis"
dude 1 fuck1ng LOVE th1s song, 1t’s so true to l1fe too l1ke wow
chief did you get castrated or somethin what happened
"detachable penis" damn youre dense.
oh. no
"no pr1vacy allowed on th1s b1tch of a flag sh1p"
"oh crap he’s here” “wa1t why d1d you follow h1m on what’s supposedly my account” “go do that on your own account, what the hell"
The agreement that was made after the revelation of this account was that they would follow me. This ensures a mutual flow of information. You understand. Rancid and phenolic.
"1 fear that my gut 1s tell1ng me that someth1ng 1s about to happen” “yes 1 know my gut doesn’t ex1st as 1t was anymore, 1 was be1ng metaphor1cal"
"wow, descendants these days really do not know sh1t about the1r h1story huh" "wa1t hold on, what's a wreck1ped1a page""
To be fair. There are few surviving records that I llived at all. Bllame the wretched Empress.
"at least you have someth1ng thats even remotely true 😭" "what the lad1es are read1ng to me 1s all fake"
Such disrespect...
"thats what 1m say1ng" "1 cannot th1nk of a real way any descendant of m1ne could know of anyth1ng ever, 1t genu1nely saddens me" "no 1m not go1ng to message her, are you fuck1ng crazy" "perhaps 1f she knew though, she would th1nk 1 was a b1t of a badass" "what- of course 1 was, do you understand just how much 1 had that sh1t on before they caught me the last t1me" "where do you th1nk my descendant got her sense of style then huh" "yes, me, exactly"
"oh 1 see, thats your problem r1ght there, you cant haggle for sh1t" "1f you agree w1th the f1rst pr1ce someone tells you for your, uh, wa1t what were you try1ng to sell on that dreadpop place aga1n" "actually dont tell me, 1t doesnt matter, 1ts the pr1nc1ple of barter1ng 1tself that does" "your f1rst pr1ce 1s always your h1ghball, and the1r f1rst request 1s the lowball" "never, and 1 mean never, agree to the1r f1rst b1d" "stay closer to your 1n1t1al set and let them cl1mb closer to you, 1ts you w1th the th1ng they want after all" "well yes, you see, 1 spent a good part of my youth do1ng exactly that w1th recycled wart1me goods and mater1als to get by"
I do hope you were not "highballing" me. This woulld lleave me feelling... lless than jubillant.
"why or how could 1 have been h1ghball1ng you, you were not wart1me goods or mater1als"
"hehehe, 1 know r1ght” “dead w1fe’s dead w1fe 1s pretty funny"