D --> The Trotswor% reassignment initiative has been a resounding success D --> Not only have we reported a 4% increase in overall efficiency D --> But we have reached a record 34% "self-mutilation and/or fatal self injury" rate D --> Down from the 65% reported only si% pedigrees ago D --> We have earned a pat on the back as a compony D --> And I have earned a tall glass of milk and a day in the spa
THOSE ARE SOME MOM N POP SHOP NUMBERS. 90% OF EMPLOYEES AT SATURN CORP SAY THEIR JOB SATISFACTION IS AT LEAST A T⌁O THUMBS UP AND 😂 ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, ⌁HICH ANALYSTS FIGURE IS PRETTY MUCH EQUI⌁ALENT TO AT LEAST AN 8, AND ALL STAFF SIGN A CLAUSE IN THEIR CONTRACT THAT THEY SUPER DUPER PINKY PROMISE NOT TO GET "BUMMED OUT" OR "DO⌁N IN THE DUMPS" IN A ⌁AY THAT IMPACTS NUMBERS. SO LIKE, BASICALLY OUR SELF-DIRECTED LIFE TERMINATION RATES ARE NIL BECAUSE THAT ⌁OULD TOTALLY BE A BREACH OF CONTRACT AND THEY ⌁OULDN'T BE STAFF AT THAT POINT ANY⌁AY, SO, THAT DOESN'T COUNT FOR NUMBERS. #ITSNOT #C⌁-SUICIDE-MENTION #IFITDOESNTHAPPENONCOMPANYTIME ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
⌁HY DID YOU HATE MY COMMENT ALL I DID ⌁AS DISPARAGE YOUR EFFORTS AS MILQUETOAST (MILK-TOAST E⌁EN???) TO PUT MYSELF IN A BETTER LIGHT.