OH MY GOD. THERE ARE SIX BOTTLES OF TROLLQUILA IN HERE WITH ME. WAIT. DID I. NO. NOT AGAIN. #SUBSTANCE
:3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_JFLb1IItM 3:
WOULD YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP AND MAKE YOURSELF AS USEFUL AS YOU SO CLEARLY ACHE AT ALL OBSEQUIOUS HOURS OF THE EVENING TO BE. I WAS *OBVIOUSLY* COERCED. I AM TRYING DESPERATELY TO REMAIN IN A LUCID STATE OF MIND, AND ALL THE FORCES OF THE FUCKING UNIVERSE SEEM HELL-BENT ON TRANSMOGRIFYING ME THROUGH A PSYCHOACTIVE RIFT INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION. LITERALLY. I WAS ON ALTERNIA WHEN I GOT EATEN. NOW I'M ON EARTH-C, AS FAR AS I CAN TELL. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT.
MIGHT GET KNOCKED OUT AND MIDLLY ASPHYXIATED VIA A BLACK BAG OVER THE HEAD IN THE NEXT FEW MINUTES. I'LL KEEP YOU AS INFORMED AS I CAN UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES.
UPDATE: I AM NOT LONGER BEING HELD AT GUNPOINT, KNIFEPOINT, OR THE POINTER STUBS OF ANY OTHER DRUG DEALER ATTEMPTING TO SMUGGLE ILLICIT #SUBSTANCE THROUGH MY ORGANS. PLEASE DO NOT CRAWL OUT OF MY PAN IF I FALL ASLEEP ON THIS SCUTTLEBUS. IT'S TOO HOT IN HERE FOR A BIGGER, SWEATIER ASSHOLE TO TAKE UP EVEN MORE SPACE ON IT.