An9nym9us says: "Hi. S9 this is 9ne 9f y9ur alternates. I 6elieve I feel pale f9r my quadrantmate's 9ther n9n-pale quadrantmate. The pr96lem is. I d9n't want t9 d9 anything that w9uld change what my quadrantmate has with the guy. 6ut he is just. I d9n't kn9w. I feel the need t9 keep him safe and pr9tect him. I'm pretty sure the pers9n I feel pale f9r d9esn't have a m9irail yet. 6ut part 9f me fears that the dynamic c9uld change a l9t if I g9t pale with the guy in questi9n. I have talked t9 my quadrantmate a69ut this and he says that it w9uldn't change anything 6etween him and the 9ther guy. 6ut I have my fears and w9rries deep within me. D9 y9u have any advice f9r me? Quadrants #QuadrantAdvice #PaleR9m #M9irailship" Hi, Kankri. F9r starters, I must admit, it is always a little surprising t9 meet a versi9n 9f myself that has either d9ne away with their celi6acy entirely 9r 9therwise never sw9re themself t9 that life t9 6egin with. 9f c9urse, I supp9rt y9ur j9urney. It just makes me w9nder. Well, that's neither here n9r there. As y9u may 9r may n9t already kn9w, as a versi9n 9f y9urself that has n9 interest in quadrants 9r r9mance whats9ever and has shielded himself fr9m this lifestyle entirely, I have n9 pers9nal experience with pale crushes, 9r any s9rt 9f crush f9r that matter, s9 any advice I can give y9u will have t9 6e very generalized. I h9pe that's 9kay. I understand the general sense 9f trepidati9n. It can 6e scary t9 engage in a new cl9se relati9nship with s9me9ne, especially if y9u're unsure 9f what this 9ther pers9n's feelings f9r y9u are, if any. It's easy t9 stay in y9ur 9wn thinkpan a69ut it and w9rry y9urself 9ver hyp9theticals and what-ifs. H9wever, y9u must remem6er that y9ur quadrantmate's quadrantmate is still his 9wn pers9n with his 9wn internal th9ughts and feelings, and it d9es neither 9f y9u any g99d t9 pr9ject y9ur assumpti9ns 9nt9 him. In fact, if y9u d9 this t99 much, y9u run the risk 9f entirely invalidating his feelings and making him think that y9u think that he's incapa6le 9f making his 9wn decisi9ns. I am a 6eliever 9f 9pen and direct c9mmunicati9n, and the 9nly way y9u will ever kn9w f9r sure is t9 directly and h9nestly have a c9nversati9n with him a69ut it. Have y9u expressed t9 this pers9n y9ur pale-leaning feelings? Has he expressed any pale feelings t9wards y9u in return? Since y9ur existing quadrantmate has already em9ti9nally accepted y9ur pursual 9f y9ur m9irailcrush, I imagine his relati9nship with this pers9n w9n't change significantly. H9wever, there is 9nly 9ne way t9 kn9w f9r sure. The w9rst that c9uld happen is that he rejects y9u, 6ut that isn't the end 9f the w9rld, and if y9ur quadrantmate-in-law were a mature adult, he w9uldn't let this affect anything with y9ur shared partner g9ing f9rward. If he isn't mature en9ugh t9 handle this, at least y9u and y9ur quadrantmate can then make the inf9rmed decisi9n t9 end things with him if need 6e. And, really, if he *isn't* mature en9ugh t9 gently let y9u d9wn, y9u can take s9lace in the fact that this isn't s9me9ne y9u'd want as a m9irail anyway. T9 make a strife speci6us related pun, y9u'd 6e d9dging a 6ullet. #ImpliedGunMenti9n #ImpliedWeap9nMenti9n I h9pe this helps. If y9u need any m9re specific advice tail9red t9 the identity 9f y9ur crush, y9u are m9re than welc9me t9 reach 9ut t9 me via DMs. #M9iraillegiance #C9ncilliat9ryR9mance #C9ncillR9m #Crushes #Crushing #Assumpti9ns #Y9uKn9wWhatTheySayWhenY9uAssume #An9nym9us #QnA #KankrisAsk69x https://f9rms.gle/1mzxNi3S8sAc8Ter9