๐ฑโฐ๐๐ oh scratch dแตaแตaแตaแตddy~ @scratchDoctorโ๏ธ๐๐โฐ๐ฑ๐ โจ๐๐ HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY YOU SEXY XXXECUTIVE!!!!!!!! ๐๐โจ ๐ซถ OH MY GOLD OH MY GOLD OH EM G OH MY GOLD ๐ซถ it's your ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐???? time to promote it to my PERMANENTLY embedded calendar crosspopupated onto EVERY device i ever own!!!!๐๐ the one (1) day where the timeline REVOLVES around who it motherfucking OUGHT TO???? out LOUD????โฐโจ i am GAGGED!!!! and yet no cue balls? huh! what's that about?๐๐ ๐ผ๐ I HAVE ALWAYS ๐FELT๐ A CERTAIN WAY ABOUT YOU ๐๐ผ ๐ i've crunched the numbers bestie (and i ALWAYS crunch the numbers~! ๐) and the data indicates you are OFFICIALLY one (1) year more POWERFUL, more RADIANT, and more DEVASTATINGLY ATTRACTIVE than the previous temporal cycle!!! AND YET? i feel EXACTLY as dedicated to repping you good and proper because hot DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?? for as long as ive existed...i shuddered to the small of my back at the base of my piddly widdle torso pillar at the STORIES about OLD SCRATCH...the unseen orchestrations of our great empires progress...the MAN on the MOON who stares unblinking without eyes...the one who TAMED the UNRULY DEMONESS...aughghhg!!! nothing? has? ever? made? me? feel? quite? the? same? way? if only she properly took to it! aHAH! ๐ ๐ฅ ๐ซตAS YOU DO๐ซต โจ๐ as an omniscient: YOU KNOW I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT BESTIE~!!! and we will NEVER age out of agreeing on that!!! #WhiteFox #MrComplexSugars #AngelCake๐โจ ๐ซ๐ค๐ซต BIRTHDAY DIRECTIVES ๐ซต๐ค๐ซ โจyou WILL accept these digital tributes!!! digitALL OF THEM!!!!!!!!!! EVERY LAST ONE!!!!! ๐ youll meet me after office hours for some yummyyyy caaaakeeeeee๐๐โจ๐ฐ๐ฅณ๐ ๐ you WILL be made to feel like the NARRATIVE HIMSELF!!!! the story is told BY and ABOUT YOU!!!! ๐ you WILL let me shower you with affection (it's TAX DEDUCTIBLE as a BUSINESS EXPENSE under โจEMOTIONAL INFRASTRUCTURE INVESTMENT so dw no charges strings terms or conditions applyโจ)!!! ๐บ you WILL dance like EVERYONE is watching (as they SHOULD be???) ๐โจ ๐you WILL find my behavior preordained and any punishment(s) therein for impossibly defying expectation already all ready for! ๐ EXECUTIVESCLUSIVE ACCES (โ) [NEW!!!] ๐ i'm offering you UNLIMITED ACCESS to my ๐ข CONSULTING SERVICES ๐ข which includes but is NOT LIMITED TO: moral support. rapport-building tips and tricks, secret hacks for finding that stitch that doesnt sit right, full seam massage services for the finer in life, around the clock entityhood appraisal, professional portfolio review, and COMPLIMENTARY headpats (long as you sit still like a GOOD DOC for your EXAMINATION๐ค๐ )!!! ๐พ Cujo has been BRIEFED AHEAD OF TIME cause we ALWAYS KNEW THIS DAY WOULD COME and is standing by with FLAVORED CONFETTI in his mouth!!! he's ready to execute business plan : FOREVER INEVITABLE!!! ๐๐ (he's very professional about it, dw, dw, i trained him myself, he's got a GREEN TIE and everything!!!) ๐๐โจ โฐ THE CLOCK IS TICKING BESTIE โฐ ๐but NOT towards doom or some eventual end!!! towards CAKE!!! towards PRESENTS!!! towards ME potentially LOSING MY GOOD SENSES because WOWZAH is it getting HEAT DEATH OF THE UNIVERSE IN HERE or are you JUST THAT HOT AT THE NEW BIG AGE???? FINE WINES MOVE OVER...THE NEW TURN OF PHRASE IS DOC SCRATCH AT THE TURN OF A CENTURY...WHOOWEEE...talk about citizen number one!๐ฅต๐ผ๐ ๐ค๐ซSTAY BIRTHDAY-PILLED!!! AND HAPPY WRIGGLING DAY IF YOU CHOOSE TO CELEBRATE??? ๐ค๐ซ #GreenSunGrindset #ConsummateProfessionalism #CakeInbound #MyBirthdayBestie #Chairministrangling #GoldStandardForHappyBirthdays #PremiumGoodTime #DocScratchedAnItch #ThisTimeIsAboutTime #TheNationOfUrSentBalloons #Ughhhhhhhhh #YesImFlirting #ItsInTheBudgetBestie #NSFW #Violence #Fast-Gif #EditOverlay #SameThighRatioBTW #HopeOmniscienceMeansYouveGotMyNumber #BirthdayBoyโจ๐ฑ๐ ๐ขโจ CHARMS REMAINS ONLINISCIENT.
You always know how to invent the market, RC.
๐๐ YOU KNOW IT DIRKFRIEND!!!!!โ๏ธ๐๐ ๐ค will this go to my head? A LITTLE FUCKING BIT!!!! ๐ ๐๐๐ doesnt make it ANY LESS SPECIAL given how often you lose yours!!! even the prettiest dolls still have heads that twist and leap from their shoulders under the right circumstances huh? just...ughghhghgh!!! thank you??? thank you. absolutely, positively, no shade!!! thanks for keeping it real!!!! ๐๐๐ ๐ขโจ CHARMS REMAINS ONLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITH!
What a remarkably thorough birthday presentation. You will, I am sure, forgive me for declining to comment publicly on every item included in your tribute. Some gifts are best acknowledged with a degree of discretion, particularly when their contents would make the accompanying cake appear almost prudish by comparison. Though I should correct one misconception. Knowing precisely what you intended to send me did not make receiving it any less enjoyable. Omniscience has never prevented appreciation. It merely allows me to begin appreciating certain presents somewhat early. Thank you, Charms. Your enthusiasm has been noted, your calendar entry is unnecessary, Cujo's preparations are commendable, and the photographs were exceptionally thoughtful. I expect you already knew which of those compliments mattered most.