@empyreansApotheosis — #mentalhealth
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- ..屮ⴵ-∊n dƗd Σ-∊lf-d-∊Σ♱ru☪︎♱ƗΩn Σ♱Ωp b-∊Ɨng ΣΩm-∊♱ⴵƗng yΩu dƗd.. Ⱥnd b-∊☪︎Ωm-∊ ΣΩm-∊Ωn-∊ yΩu Ⱥr-∊? nΩ♱ juΣ♱ ♱ⴵ-∊ ☪︎u♱♱Ɨng, p-∊Ωpl-∊ Ωnly r-∊☪︎ΩgnƗz-∊ pȺƗn 屮ⴵ-∊n Ɨ♱ bl-∊-∊dΣ lΩudly, ♱ⴵ-∊y dΩn'♱ nΩ♱Ɨ☪︎-∊ ♱ⴵ-∊ quƗ-∊♱-∊r 屮ȺyΣ yΩu Σ♱Ⱥr♱ dƗΣȺpp-∊ȺrƗng. Σ|⟨Ɨpp-∊d m-∊ȺlΣ ♱ⴵȺ♱ ♱urn ⴵung-∊r Ɨn♱Ω ΣΩm-∊♱ⴵƗng fȺmƗlƗȺr, Σl-∊-∊pl-∊ΣΣ nƗgⴵ♱Σ Σp-∊n♱ rΩ♱♱Ɨng Ɨn blu-∊ lƗgⴵ♱ b-∊☪︎ȺuΣ-∊ r-∊Σ♱Ɨng m-∊ȺnΣ b-∊Ɨng ȺlΩn-∊ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ yΩurΣ-∊lf. ⴵȺƗr grΩ屮Ɨng lΩng-∊r b-∊☪︎ȺuΣ-∊ yΩu Σ♱Ωpp-∊d ☪︎ȺrƗng 屮ⴵȺ♱ r-∊fl-∊☪︎♱ƗΩn yΩu drȺgg-∊d ȺrΩund, -∊y-∊Σ dullƗng ΣlΩ屮ly, nΩ♱ ΣȺd. juΣ♱ -∊xⴵȺuΣ♱-∊d frΩm ☪︎ȺrryƗng ...Read more
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- ⴵ♱♱pΣ://☪︎dn.Ɨmg☪︎ⴵ-∊Σ♱.☪︎Ωm/fƗl-∊Σ/-∊23-∊9Ⱥdf91-∊d.png Ɨ'm jΩ|⟨Ɨng Ωf ☪︎ΩurΣ-∊ nƗgⴵ♱mȺr-∊Σ ȺƗn♱ ΣⴵƗ♱ ȺnymΩr-∊, ♱Ω♱Ⱥlly. #m-∊n♱Ⱥlⴵ-∊Ⱥl♱ⴵ #nΣf屮 (ΣⴵƗr♱l-∊ΣΣ) -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- 屮ⴵȺ♱ ⴵȺpp-∊nΣ 屮ⴵ-∊n ♱ⴵ-∊ pȺr♱ Ωf yΩu ♱ⴵȺ♱ 屮Ⱥn♱Σ ♱Ω lƗv-∊, Ⱥnd ♱ⴵ-∊ pȺr♱ Ωf yΩu ♱ⴵȺ♱ 屮Ⱥn♱Σ ♱Ω dƗ-∊, bΩ♱ⴵ ☪︎Ⱥll yΩu ⴵΩm-∊? D-∊pr-∊ΣΣƗΩn ƗΣ nΩ♱ Ⱥ mΩnΣ♱-∊r, mΩnΣ♱-∊rΣ ȺrrƗv-∊ lΩudly, ♱ⴵ-∊y l-∊Ⱥv-∊ ♱-∊-∊♱ⴵ mȺr|⟨Σ fΩr -∊v-∊ryΩn-∊ ♱Ω Σ-∊-∊. ♱ⴵƗΣ ƗΣ quƗ-∊♱-∊r, Ⱥn Ɨnⴵ-∊rƗ♱Ⱥn☪︎-∊, Ⱥ |⟨-∊y l-∊f♱ Ɨn my pΩ☪︎|⟨-∊♱ by ⴵȺndΣ Ɨ'v-∊ n-∊v-∊r m-∊♱. Ɨ ☪︎Ⱥrry Ɨ♱ -∊v-∊ry屮ⴵ-∊r-∊, nΩ♱ b-∊☪︎ȺuΣ-∊ Ɨ 屮Ⱥn♱ ♱Ω, b-∊☪︎ȺuΣ-∊ Ɨ ☪︎ȺnnΩ♱ Σ-∊-∊m ♱Ω pu♱ Ɨ♱ dΩ屮n. ΣΩm-∊ dȺyΣ Ɨ fΩrg-∊♱ Ɨ♱Σ ♱ⴵ-∊r-∊, 屮ⴵ-∊n lƗf-∊ grΩ屮Σ ⴵ-∊Ⱥvy, my ☪︎ⴵ-∊Σ♱ fƗllΣ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ 屮Ɨn♱-∊r, Ⱥnd Ɨ Σudd-∊nly f-∊-∊l ♱ⴵ-∊ |⟨-∊y ȺgȺƗn, ☪︎Ωld ȺgȺƗnΣ♱ ...Read more
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- ȺnΩ♱ⴵ-∊r bΩu♱ Ωf ΣȺdn-∊ΣΣ, r-∊v-∊rb-∊rȺ♱Ɨng Ɨn my mƗnd. ..Ɨ♱'ll pȺΣΣ, lƗ|⟨-∊ -∊v-∊ry Ω♱ⴵ-∊r bΩu♱ dΩ-∊Σ. #m-∊n♱Ⱥlⴵ-∊Ⱥl♱ⴵ -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- ♱ⴵ-∊ mȺn Σ♱ruggl-∊Σ ♱Ω ☪︎-∊l-∊brȺ♱-∊ ⴵƗΣ Ⱥ☪︎ⴵƗ-∊v-∊m-∊n♱Σ b-∊☪︎ȺuΣ-∊ Ɨn ⴵƗΣ mƗnd Ɨ♱ 屮ȺΣ ⴵƗΣ ΩblƗgȺ♱ƗΩn ♱Ω Ⱥ☪︎ⴵƗ-∊v-∊ ♱ⴵ-∊m, nΩ♱ Ωu♱ Ωf ⴵƗΣ Ω屮n 屮Ⱥn♱ ♱Ω Ⱥ☪︎ⴵƗ-∊v-∊ ♱ⴵ-∊m. #m-∊n♱Ⱥlⴵ-∊Ⱥl♱ⴵ -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- Ɨ |⟨nΩ屮 ♱ⴵ-∊ ΣȺdn-∊ΣΣ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵƗn m-∊ ƗΣn’♱ dƗΣΣȺ♱ƗΣfȺ☪︎♱ƗΩn, Ɨ’m mΩr-∊ ♱ⴵȺn ΣȺ♱ƗΣfƗ-∊d 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ my lƗf-∊, Ɨ g-∊♱ ♱Ω m-∊-∊♱ lΩv-∊ly p-∊Ωpl-∊, Ɨ ⴵȺv-∊ Ⱥ b-∊Ⱥu♱Ɨful mȺ♱-∊ 屮ⴵΩm Ɨ Σp-∊nd -∊v-∊ry nƗgⴵ♱ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ. Ⱥnd Ɨ |⟨nΩ屮 Ɨ♱ ƗΣn♱ Ɨd-∊n♱Ɨ♱y -∊Ɨ♱ⴵ-∊r, Ɨ |⟨nΩ屮 屮ⴵΩ Ɨ Ⱥm, 屮ⴵȺ♱ Ɨ Ⱥm, ȺΣ mu☪︎ⴵ ȺΣ Ɨ♱ 屮ȺΣ pȺƗnful ♱Ω ⴵȺv-∊ gΩn-∊ ♱ⴵrΩugⴵ my lƗf-∊ b-∊fΩr-∊ ♱ⴵƗΣ mΩm-∊n♱, ⴵȺd ♱ⴵƗngΣ gΩn-∊ dƗff-∊r-∊n♱ly ♱ⴵȺn ⴵΩ屮 ♱ⴵ-∊y 屮-∊r-∊ ΣuppΩΣ-∊d ♱Ω, Ɨ 屮Ωuldn’♱ /b-∊/ ȺrȺdym, ♱ⴵȺ♱Σ 屮ⴵy ♱Ɨm-∊lƗn-∊Σ -∊xƗΣ♱ 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ dƗff-∊r-∊n♱ vȺrƗȺ♱ƗΩnΣ Ⱥnd Ωu♱☪︎Ωm-∊Σ. Ɨ Ⱥm und-∊nƗȺbly Ⱥ mȺl-∊ ȺmΩngΣ♱ Ⱥ ☪︎ȺΣ♱-∊ ♱ⴵȺ♱ ⴵȺd Ωnly b-∊-∊n 屮Ωm-...Read more
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- [ⴵȺndl-∊ ☪︎ⴵȺNGƗNG!] -- -- [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵ-∊ΩpⴵΩΣƗΣ] ƗΣ nΩ屮 [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵ-∊ΩⴵΩΣƗΣ!] -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- [...nΩbl-∊ Σuff-∊r-∊r.] -- [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵΩrpⴵΩΣƗΣ] ƗΣ nΩ屮 [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵ-∊rpⴵΩΣƗΣ!] #♱Ω♱ȺlƗ♱y -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- [...?] -- [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱mΩrpⴵΩΣƗΣ] ƗΣ nΩ屮 [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩ♱ⴵΩrpⴵΩΣƗΣ!] -- #♱Ω♱ȺlƗ♱y -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- [ⴵȺndl-∊ ☪︎ⴵȺngƗng.] -- [-∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺp♱ȺmΩrpⴵΩΣƗΣ ƗΣ nΩ屮 -∊mpyr-∊ȺnΣȺpΩȺmΩrpⴵΩΣƗΣ!] -- -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
THERES ALWAYS SOMETHING OF AN ODD GLEE I START TO FEEL WHENEVER I GET TO ENGAGE IN SOME SEMBLANCE OF HUMOR OR AS ITS CALLED.. 'SHITPOSTING' MAYBE ITS BECAUSE I GET TO FEEL SOME SEMBLANCE OF WHAT IT WOULD'VE BEEN LIKE IF I HAD GOTTEN THE CHANCE TO ACTUALLY EXPERIENCE CHILDHOOD. ..I THINK THIS JUST MEANS I WOULD'VE BEEN A TOTAL SHITLORD HAD I NOT GONE THROUGH WHAT I HAVE. #MENTALHEALTH?
SOMETIMES IM LEFT WONDERING ON IF I AM STRONG ENOUGH TO PROTECT THOSE AROUND ME THAT I HOLD DEAR AND IF MY SELF-WORTH IS TIED ONLY IF I HOLD THE GREATEST RESERVES OF PHYSICALITY AND STRENGTH. I MEAN SHIT, I HAD BEEN CONDITIONED INTO THAT FOR MOST OF MY LIFE. BUT I OCCASSIONALLY QUESTION ON WHEN I WILL EVER GET A CHANCE TO BREATHE, FROM ENDLESSLY CARRYING THE BURDEN OF SUCH. #MENTALHEALTH
SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT DESERVING OF THE GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO ME DESPITE THE FACT THAT I DO. I WISH I COULD FEEL LIKE I'M DESERVING OF THE PEOPLE AROUND ME, BUT I DONT. BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I HAVE ANY OTHER WORTH BESIDES JUST BEING STRONG, I WANT DO MORE FOR THEM YET I FIND MYSELF STRUGGLING TO NAIL DOWN A INTEREST THAT I TRULY ENJOY, ITS LIKE A CONSTANT FEEDBACK LOOP OF THINKING I DONT DESERVE MY MATESPRIT, TRYING TO GET BETTER AT OTHER SHIT SO THAT I FEEL LIKE IM BRINGING MORE TO THE TABLE THAN JUST "BEING STRONG KILL GUY" AND THEN FINDING MYSELF MORE AND MORE LOST. #MENTALHEALTH
SOMETIMES I SIT DOWN AND I HAVE THE CRIPPLING REALIZATION OF THE FACT THAT FOR MOST OF MY LIFE I WAS TREATED LIKE AN OBJECT INSTEAD OF AN ACTUAL PERSON. AND BECAUSE OF THAT, I TAKE WHAT SEEMINGLY WOULD BE SURFACE LEVEL DECENCY AS GESTURES OF INCREDIBLE GENEROSITY AND ANY SORT OF KINDNESS I CLING TO LIKE A RAFT IN A HORRIFIC SEA-STORM AS IF I WAS GOING TO DROWN. #MENTALHEALTH