MY CAPACITY FOR BEING SUCH A MASSIVE FUCKING CHUD ON OCCASION GENUINELY UPSETS ME. I DO NOT ACTUALLY HAVE TO BE LIKE THIS. WHY THE FUCK IS IT SECOND NATURE? DID THE POWERS THAT BE REALLY NOT CONSIDER THAT I COULDβVE JUST BEEN AN ASSHOLE AND MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, A LITTLE BIT COOL WHILE I WAS AT IT? A NONCHALANT ASSHOLE. SOMEONE WITH A LITTLE FUCKING SWAGGER. THAT COULDβVE BEEN ME. BUT NO. INSTEAD, IβM AN ASSHOLE *AND* A CHUD TO BOOT. GOD, I FUCKING SUCK. β KK

LOL. itβs ok, karkat. consider it your plan b if denying it doesnβt appearify your chud likeness away. like, theyβll be waiting with OPEN arms!!

Get well s00n! βοΈ

umm!! donβt! iβll feel totes obligated to comfort you and i am really bad at doing that soooo. youβre not a chud, problem solved. :)

i would tell you to take a breather but i think wanting to take more breathers and be less reactive is kinda the point of your post. so instead of telling you to do the thing you already planned on like someone telling their kid to take out the trash, i instead will say: good evening! or morning depending!
I FELT THE INHERENT URGE TO IMMEDIATELY GO AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGMENT AND FREAK THE FUCK OUT ON YOU, IF ONLY OUT OF SPITE AT THE IDEA OF FOLLOWING MY OWN ADVICE WHEN ITβS COMING FROM THE PERSON IβVE CONSISTENTLY BEEFED WITH OVER THE PROS AND CONS OF WORRYING ABOUT DUMB SHIT. BUT THEN I REALIZED THAT DOING SO WOULD CONSTITUTE MULTILAYERED CHUD BEHAVIOR, AND SOMEHOW THAT ALONE WAS ENOUGH TO COMPLETELY WAKE ME THE FUCK UP TO THE REALITY OF WHAT I WAS DOING. ALL THAT TO SAY: MORNING, EGBERT.

if it helps karkat? i've genuinely been struggling a lot with intense negative reactions to things based entirely off of assumption lately! so like. i get it and i hope you know i'm not making fun!!! have you had breakfast?
FOR FUCKβS SAKE. I HATE IT WHEN YOU GET ALL UNIRONICALLY HUMAN FEELSY ABOUT SHIT YOU SHOULD BE MORE THAN EAGER TO RELENTLESSLY MOCK SOMEONE FOR. YOU WOULDβVE MADE SUCH A SHIT TROLL. FOR CLARIFICATIONβS SAKE, IβM /J-ING. OR /HJ-ING. IβM /SOMETHING RIGHT NOW. IβVE EATEN, BUT I THINK IβM JUST FEELING OUT THE USUAL EARLY-DAY STRESS JITTERS BEFORE I GO BACK TO NOT BEING A PATHETIC LOSER FOR THE REST OF THE DAY. IβLL BE FINE.

i save my mockery for worthy targets, dude. like that weirdo scratch or the real chud of chittr, lord english. if you want me to make fun of you, suck more.

y0, braintrust, being all self-pitying is making your l0ser asshole energy W0RSE. i hate when you get like this. if y0u can't muster any confidence, at least fake it.
