I think rather often about how many times I mess up relationships and it makes me fearful about my current one. I was absolutely terrible to Kanaya someone I respected and she didn't deserve any of that, I don't talk to her anymore for both our sakes. Then afterwards I was just chasing a high, a relationship to make her jealous or forget about her entirely. I dated Vriska in the most toxic relationship I've ever been in, I dated alternate versions of Kanaya to try and cope, I dated alternate versions of myself as a way to just forget, I really was just looking for an out. But now I have someone I'm dating because I love her and it's so terrifying because I feel like I'm just going to mess this up again. She's nothing like Kanaya but it feels as if I'm back at the Start of this cycle and I so desperately don't want it to repeat itself. I need a drink. #substances
im here for you.... you can grow i just know it
I know I'm capable of getting better, I know I am already Leagues better than I was. Still, feels like I can undo it all in a second.
but you wont.... youll try hard and be the best you possible :)
Thank you Jade, You really almost always know what to say.
im loyal as a dog hehe :P
You're the best Jade, I would say something along the lines of good dog but that seems dehumanizing. So thank you, I appreciate you dearly.
uh.... i dont mind.... just not right now hehe :P
I understand, well Still you're the best Jade, thank you so much.