
>i shit you not with this one >be me last night >order troll dominos because i'm starving to death and refuse to pay Big Poppa J's extortionate-ass prices >chain is already an unreliable piece of shit >delivers flavordiscs at roughly the same speed a fat fuck passes a slaughtersphere-sized kidney stone >but hey!!! >deals upon deals upon deals FTW >surely that means something >turns out the discounts exist exclusively to make you feel like a complete fucking idiot for what happens next >WAIT SIX ENTIRE HOURS FOR A HALF-HOUR ESTIMATED DELIVERY >WATCH THE GRUBHUB GUY FULLY TRAVEL TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE FUCKING CITY >WATCH HIM APPARENTLY DECIDE THAT DELIVERING MY FOOD IS SECONDARY TO KICKING IT WITH THE BOYS >TRACKING APP LOOKING LIKE I'M MONITORING A MIGRATORY ANIMAL >finally shows up at my hive with a shit-eating grin plastered across his face >absolutely blasted out of his thinkpan >flavordisc is cold >wings fried harder than his frontal lobe >stood there for a solid ten seconds contemplating whether i should simply evaporate him and his busted-ass scuttlebuggy directly off the face of alternia >unfortunately he's indigo so instead i had to settle for spitting in his gander globe and spending the rest of the night hate-eating microwaved disappointment >bruh

