

Percival Sabatino
@percySabatino
hardboiled detective with a finger in organised crime (My DND Player Character version of Problem Sleuth. May not be consistent with Problem Sleuth lore because of campaign changes!)
guys i dont think we planned this het gala heist at all
okay i bought the grenades, the elf was persuasive
please get this elf out of our house, hes trying to sell us grenades
HE PULLED OUT A BOX AND SAID "there is infinite trap inside, trap is infinite, you can hear scream of trapped" WHY DOES HE HAVE THIS
he pulled out a mummified hand with an eternal flames and i dont know why he has this im very upset by this
HE FROZE ME HE FROZE ME NOT COOL ELF MAN
okay this elf is pissing me off. he keeps testing magic items on me! "immovable rod" in my jacket, portable silence, scary hat i dont know why im the one being tested on
HE TELLS ME TO MONOLOGUE AND THEN CASTS SILENCE? THEN WHY ASK??? I WAS GOING TO MONOLOGUE!
HOW MANY PEOPLE DID BOXCARS SLEEP WITH???
i forgot my job, there will ABSOLUTELY be gun fights and mob wars going on
het gala tonight if we dont explode into gunfights and mafia turf wars, ill post pics maybe
usually i keep close to estelle during events but i think shes got a hot new fashion boyfriend so our whole pretend-to-date-to-fool-the-dwarves deal is no longer a go ... should i ask...? no no, i shouldnt ask.
im going to a gala soon and i need to be dressed to the nines because anyone got any cool stylish suits thatll make women want me and men want me?
this #fatfuckfriday is making me miss my brother oh bobby, why did you have to get yourself involved with the mob
never get between a man and his brooding time not like egg brood but like cool hardboiled pensive brooding while looking out the window smoking a cigarette while a dame tearful gives you exposition on her latest troubles
i think my magic fedora is very cool actually and anyone who says otherwise has no taste
OKAY FALSE ALARM i am not dismembered anymore forgot i could do that
sometimes i forget im a gepettin, but when i do, i do this [Collapses into a pile of mannequin limbs] pretty cool huh?





