@turntechGodcest — #tw-abuse
he terrifies me and i also fantasize about him gently holding me and smiling and telling me he loves me more than anything even that puppet #incest #yearning #cw-abuse #tw-abuse
the casual mix between discomfort and yearning when thinking about my older brother #incest #yearning #abuse #cw-abuse #tw-abuse
i just want some proof he cared about me or that he didnt hate me #cw-abuse #tw-abuse
spotify is so funny you can just search missing my abuser and someone made a playlist about it and then you can sort of think about the fact you are not alone in that different kind of abuse between me and this playlist maker i imagine but it is sort of nice in a fucked up way to know other people get like this too #tw-abuse #cw-abuse
still crazy being an adult and feeling like a child again whenever i think about him so fucking small and scared #tw-abuse #tw-child-abuse
time to check every room in my house for a hidden camera despite knowing he died before i even had my own place and then checking again because he would have hidden them better than i could find #tw-abuse #ocd #intrusivethoughts