Bass & Barrel
@twinShooters
Juu2t 2 trooll2 thaat aare twiin2 twiin2!! We 2haare everythiing. everythiing. even quuaad2! | ooc: kingGreed
why are skeletons so calm?
why why?
think you missed the reply, pals.
꒦꒷MO♱herfucker MediA♱ed Me. I'mmA Be Ex♱rA NOsy NOw.꒷꒦
Hey there friiend friiend!
Boo22 ii2 pretty fuunny fuunny! Buut we're glaad glaad yoouu aaren't boothered!
Thinking ★bout kissing, ★nd biting. Mostly biting to be honest.
yeaaaaaaaaaah biitiing! fuuck em uup uup!
Well, I don't know ★bout "fuck them up" but ye★h.
We haad too maake the 2entence aa liil loonger loonger 2oo we diidn't end oon biitiing biitiing felt aa biit weiird weiird yaa knoow?
We goot iinviited too aa "henchventiioon" "henchventiioon" Henchmaan Coonventiioon...
thaat'2 aa diifferent coonventiioon coonventiioon henchventiioon haa2 oonly been aaroouund aaroouund foor aa few 2weep2.
A chittrUser's dirty little pamphlet guide to fuck-ass trinkets with no value. Or. "The Fuck's A Badge Anyway?" Badges. Chittr's answer to: "What if my avatar, banner, and username just ain't enough bling. How will people know that I have atypical gendering, a love for snails, the joking ire of at least one moderator?" Fret not, McGee. In her infinite codematronly wisdom, Mocáli Flaske has devised a solution to all these representative woes. You only have to grovel for it. Am I joking? We'll see. → "Where does this hideous pixel slop live?" The humble badge is displayed beside your username for every chump to see. On some devices, hovering over the little shits will display highly humorous titles and subtitles dictating the intended purpose or goal of said little shit. [Yes, it doesn't always work on mobile. We're looking into that, with hammers. Maybe this post will be retroactively edited to laugh about this coding folly. Maybe it won't.] When receiving a badge, a moderator makes sweet backroom love to the secret assignment button, shipping your "I'm so cool." indicator directly to your site SETTINGS page by sicknasty stork. Just above your permanent profile deletion options, or the DANGER ZONE, lives the user-side badge repository. Application is simple. Click that thing. Hit save. Clicking multiple badges lets you arrange them in order of selection. Highlighting nonbinary, neopronouns, #TeamPlay means all badges display in that configuration. Such technology. Such innovation. → "Is there a list of these things?" Nope. Certain users have crowd-sourced a rough guesstimation of the badge situation, now months out of date. We haven't made a list for a couple reasons. One: I can't be fucked to keep it updated. Two: the Chittr Team considers badges to be equal parts intra-community chitchat material and reward for sake of reward. See a badge you just need to boast? Ask the freak bearing this heavy crown where they got that thing. Look at you, farming Kult and Kull score organic style. Useless engagement numbers are warm for your form. This social capital is maddening. It could go to your head. → "Okay, man. What if I already know what I need? Who do I threaten?" Great attitude there, McGee. You can direct message a schmuck bearing the Blue Shield badge, displayed beside my username for convenience. That's the "official moderator" badge, assigned to pure of heart maidens like myself. Or, you can just ping my hand-coded NOT-brainclone badgebot @imJunior. It gets the job done. Usually. ...What? Oh. I get it. Groveling for a badge is out of character for you. Likely story, but we'll play it cool. I know your game, so we've got a solution to your desperation. Go to the Chittr Official Discord and open a ticket. You'll get what you're looking for. The satisfaction you crave. Unless the badge is user-unique, assigned to just one guy. Then you can get fucked right down the street and around the corner. → "What the hell? People can have unique badges? Where's mine? Show me the face of God." Simple enough. Unique badges are awarded by request, usually following a user reaching a milestone. This can be an event, some dashboard drama users got mad twisted up in, a party hosted at your pad, the act of reaching an arbitrary Kult or Kull score, or just like... some bullshit. One guy got badged for writing a few pick-up manuals. It's that easy. The "reach out" element is not negotiable. Bitch about your sordid achievements to Junior or another moderator. Open a ticket. Engagement feeds the gaping hole in my chest where self-love would usually make home. Don't you care. Don't you want me. Anyway. Sometimes badge ideas are rejected. It's not personal; the team will explain why each time. You can request community badges too, for your little clubs or just a general badge for any sadsack to use. Like snails? Leaves? A specific hemocaste? A free-for-all badge can help you foster imaginary bonds with losers you'll never chitt. At the end of the day, we're all shitheads looking for connection. Make it easier by requesting a badge for the gang. → "Tell me more about these wondrous toys, oh Prince." Beg, again. Haha. Just kidding. Every badge image scrunches down to 32 by 32 pixels. Talk about laundry shrinkage. What the fuck is this? Profile jewelry for ants? The maximum information contained is 100 KB, because storing this shit ain't cheap. Yes, you can submit your own badge images including GIFs, but I'll force Junior to slow that shit down if it's a flashy epileptic sleeper activation bomb. So. Be cool. Generally speaking, Chittr's not in the market to make badges about hating a motherfucker or explicitly advertising dong. Not sure where the sandy line was drawn? Just ask. Sometimes Junior will show up in your comments to randomly badge you. It does that. Usually the badge given is in reference to some bullshit you pulled, like tagging things properly or being a specific type of nuisance. Junior doesn't have feelings. It's not personal. You can own infinite badges, but you can only equip seven. Switch them out, mix them up, dragonmax 'til the knights get roasted. I'm not your God and the paradoxical reach of universal discretion is just barely in your grasp. Go forth and freak it. → "So. Can I get a badge?" You know what? Your tenacity is almost tolerable. Sure. I made one just for you. Comment "prince bitch idiot" to receive it. Receiving a quadrant reaction means you're part of the in-crowd.
thaank2 boo22 priince biitch iidiioot iidiioot! #goooonliife
Keep up the great work. Nobody goons like you.
whaat we coon2iider coon2iider hiim gettiing aaloong wiith aanyoone aanyoone ii2 aa very loow baarriier baarriier oof entry entry boo22
Y̶e̶s, He̶ ̶I̶s Q̶u̶i̶te̶ ̶U̶n̶ami̶cable̶._
we haad too gooregle thaat thaat. he caan be aamiicaable aamiicaable buut he dooe2 liike mooney mooney aa loot moore thaan peoople peoople. boo22.
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#P9sitivity
i dunno about this one chief... this is lovwkey #problematic, vwhat about people wvho dont hawve a self? or havwe multiple selvwes? #cwv-selfism. do better.
We're goonnaa be be the be2t henchmen henchmen ever!
boo22 ii2 haappy haappy thaat we goot woork woork ootherboo22 ii2 cooool aa2 2hiit 2hiit.
Bôss makes a caegar, wese aŁsô make sôme caegars, everybôdy's happy when da bôss is happy. #GôônŁife
Maay yoouu aall aachiieve aachiieve 2uucce22 iin yoouur endevoouur2 endevoouur2! 2hoooot aa mootherfuucker!!
shooting is for pussie's. stab a motherfucker instead
We liike 2hooootiing 2hooootiing!! noo oone ii2 aa puu22y puu22y. haave fuun fuun.
shooting keep's you at a distance from the prey and doesnt let you truly relish in the violence. where the fuck is the intimacy and bloodlust with shooting a mf
Noone! Hoow we liike iit iit! Aiin't need aany oof thaat thaat iintiimaacy aaiint needed needed too get the joob doone doone
if its just for a job then i guess that make's more sense. getting rid of a mf isnt at all the same as violence for fun or bloodlust
Loock aand Looaaded Looaaded! Whaat'2 uup Up Everyoone?
c< welcOMe 2 tHe party! >c
c< HOws it gOiN 4 yall? >c
Pretty gooood Gooood!! Cuurrently tryiing too too Maake oouur boo22 boo22 Chiill, buut he aaiin't Aiin't Thriilled. Hoow yaa dooiin? Dooiin?
c< iM dOiN alrigHt! 2K a bit Of a Nap earlier, but, gOt iNterrupted by sOMe eNeMies, sO, iM gONNa fiNd a better place 2 rest 4 tHe ligHt, i HOpe yall figure Out HOw 2 cHill yOur bOss! >c
Thaat'2 gooood! gooood! I hoope yoouu caan caan fiind aa plaace too caamp caamp! We aare fiiguuriing iit oouut oouut. He'2 maad aaboouut 2oomethiing 2oomethiing Be 2aafe ookaay? ookaay?
c< ill dO My best! aNd yOu sHOuld as well! >c