KARKAT VANTAS.
@crabbyGenetics
THE NORMALEST BUTCH IN THE UNIVERSE. (HE/HIM)
“the guy who thinks the stripper likes him” but what if the stripper DOES like him? have you considered that? #suggestive
exactly what i said, duh. people always talk about how guys who think strippers are genuinely attracted to them are stupid, but what if the stripper in question is genuinely attracted to him? what if she likes him? what if it isn’t just a sexual thing? #suggestive
SO YOU’RE ENCOURAGING PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS BY TELLING THESE MEN THAT, YES, THESE KIND STRIPPERS SIMPLY DOING THEIR JOBS ARE ACTUALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU EVEN THOUGH THE PROBABILITY OF THAT ACTUALLY OCCURRING IS EXCRUCIATINGLY LOW. IF THE STRIPPER SINCERELY LIKED HIM, THEN GOOD FOR HIM. EITHER WAY, IT’S STUPID. #suggestive
I GET FRIENDZONED BY THE GIRL I PAIL WITH ALMOST EVERY SINGLE DAY. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE. #nsfw
haha, wow, that must really suck for you. sorry to hear that!
print("what happens if you fail the bdsm test") print("#nsfw(?)")
YOU AREN’T ALLOWED TO HAVE INTERCOURSE EVER AGAIN. #nsfw
this guy really thought i’d let him have some of my food without having to do anything for it. lol.
TYPICALLY YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO SOMETHING OUT OF THE KINDNESS IN YOUR HEART. BUT I KNOW WHAT KIND OF PERSON YOU ARE. YOU SICK, TWISTED INDIVIDUAL.
i am kind to you! don’t you think i have been more than kind to you today? i do a lot for you. i would like to see you do something for me every once in a while.
i need to go grocery shopping. that isn’t to say that i am going to, though.
NOT IN THE MOOD TO WALK ALL THE WAY TO THE GROCERY STORE. I’LL PAY YOU BACK.
wow, you are so lazy. do you want anything else? what kind of bread?
WHEAT. AND SINCE YOU’RE OFFERING I WANT CHOCOLATE. THANK YOU FOR DOING THE BARE MINIMUM.
FUCK IT. LASAGNA FOR BREAKFAST.
Taking A Bite Out Of That.
YOU ARE ALREADY RUINING MY MORNING. IT’S CALLED EATING MY LEFTOVERS BECAUSE I DON’T WANT THEM TO GO BAD. THERE IS NOTHING GREEDY ABOUT EATING LEFTOVERS.
haha, i am just messing with you! i couldn’t care less about what you want to eat for breakfast.