hi chittr. we need to talk about you n me. actually just about me, mostly, cause when has saturn ever talked about anythin other than himself? right? is he even capable a NOT makin it about him? does he give a single solitary fuck about any a you enough to not make this about him? “oh saturn what’s wrong ;( what’s the matter ;(( we love you saturn ;((( you’re such a good friend saturn you’re so NICE saturn surely you don’t mean it saturn we’re here for you saturn ;’((((((” shut up. shut up. so the elephant in the room. for some reason I get the feelin the folks who’ve already sussed out my damage think i don’t use that one name cause a the alt rep. like i’m sooooooooooo fuckin scared a bein associated with what any ol cronus ampora’s done, like saturn’s some get outta jail free card for me, like saturn ain’t done a perfectly bang up job fucking his way into makin sure anyone that says yes to him feels like SHIT for it, like saturn’ll make it all copacetic to be liked like a reeeeal person by reeeeeal people. that last one. that one’s kinda true actually, lol, cause truth is long as he barks the right way at the right time no one gives it a second thought to say yes to bein besties with saturn right ;P? i’m so good at it. i’m so fucking good at it and i’m so sick of seeing every possible multiversal russian roulette on whether the new cronus ampora a the week punches in the right song n dance to make “REAL” connection with other people. i’ll be honest the whiplash range between bein on some kinda watch list to bestest baby boy ever is hilarious. upshot is ig it does really prove the only fucking conditional worth anyone has is based on whether you pass the auditions. oh hey, that reminds me! happy father’s day by the way, that’s the whole reason i picked today for this, i thought it’d be funny. saturn was always supposed to be for me. saturn was because a what the deadeyed no lights on at home zombie called orphaner dualscar did to a little thing out of the caverns he named cronus. he never let me call him dad, yknow. did you all know that? super hated it, wouldn't talk to me for days if i did. super hated a lot of what his kid was, some real trolls don’t cry type shit lol. then would turn right around and and and and saturn came way after all that, obviously, but, i’m just saying. it was never ABOUT denial or pretendin to be someone i’m not. if anything saturn was supposed to be about bein GENUINE for a change. anyway. i know i’m a lot, an this is turnin into a real drag ;P. i was tryin to stay on topic but it kinda got away from me. here's the sparknotes: after a lotta introspection and soul searching, i really think you all are the most shallow suckers evwer, and this wvhole script has turned into a dripfeed torture directly into the back a my skull. don’t evwer get it fuckin tvwisted to think i’m doing anything i do for anyone but myself. i’vwe changed, i’vwe changed a lot, i'm proud of myself, but it’s NOT for you!!!! poor cronus. poor every single last one of em. poor me. i hope you all are sick to death of me and sorry for me and give up on figurin out what to even do with this. sorry in advance btw, be on the lookout for my own song n dance denyin all a this in a few days i'm sure it'll be great.
Døn't tąlk tø mę lįkę thąt. Ewęr. And thąt įsn't støppįng mę.
or what
● • reaally • this • shit? • aagaain? • If • I • weren't • in • grippy • sock • jaail, • I • WOULD • come • by • aand • shaake • your • stupid • aass. gottaa • stop • with • this • draamaatic • shit. • or • you'll • aactuaally • hurt • someone • you • caare • aabout • aand • yourself • seriously. • ●
for what iit2 worth ii thiink youre okay ii mean 2elf piitiiyiing two the max and 2hiit but you know gla22 hiive2 and all that
don't you fucking move you self righteous asshole. nothing i can do i haven't done already ;P like riding a bike or something.
buddy you don't know me from adam
● • i • aam • faar • from • self-righteous, • you • aanxious • neurotic • douchebaag. • BUT • if • you • do • aanything • craazy • i • will • cut • the • visit • here • short. aand • thaat's • not • reaassuring!!!!! • ●
So. Saturn. I'll admit. I have a, paradoxical condition, where, I struggle to keep prominent figures in paradox space in my head for long, too much is shifting, too much is changing. All these people who are like, hey you should know that David guy or whatever, I blink and he's gone. I dunno why. Maybe it's because I'm an strange alien or something all along. I bring all of this up, because, of anyone out there, you stick out to me. You, as you truly are. I couldn't mix you up for anyone else out there, I couldn't forget you. We've only known each other for a bit but like. I don't know man. You're like a fun older brother I wish I could've had. I can tell that you're a sweet caring person just trying your best. Just. Reach out if you ever want to hang out or if you need someone to sail the stars and shoot the shit with you out there. You leave such an impact on those around you like you wouldn't believe. And I'm glad you found a path for you and something that feels uniquely you.