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John Lalonde

@tendonTrickster

he/him. jokester. opinions are my own. you block me=i win. mage of breath. (PFP by @golgothasTerror9084.)

Blood: AnonymousKult Score: 232Kull Score: 3746 followers13 following
PINNED CHITT

(#violence) Your name is JOHN LALONDE. As previously mentioned it is your BIRTHDAY. A number of attempts at cakes are scattered around your room. You'll get there eventually. You have a variety of other interests that you are ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD AT. You like to perform MAGIC ACTS befitting of a WIZENED SAGE OF THE MYSTICAL ARTS. You often say you are such a skilled magician that you even made your FATHER DISAPPEAR. That is one of your favorites in your arsenal of MORBID and SELF-DEPRECATING JOKES. It is a great point of pride. Making fun of yourself can elevate any conversation, especially on those rare but ever-so-special moments when your humor makes people KIND OF UNCOMFORTABLE. Then you have EVEN MORE ANGST to turn into comedy. It is a cycle that CANNOT POSSIBLY BACKFIRE. You also like to entertain yourself with INTERNET VIDEOS of GRATUITOUS VIOLENCE. It makes you think about how, in such a heinous and tense situation, you would simply NOT GET KILLED. For instance, if a cartel wanted to behead you, you would fend them off, starting by throwing your collection of METAL WATER BOTTLES in IRONICALLY BRIGHT COLORS. (Because you are screaming along to EVANESCENCE SONGS so often. One benefit of your mother's aloofness is that you can be as loud as you want and she does not care.) What will you do? (https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/6c37de14df84.png Sprite made using FarragoFiction's Homestuck Doll Maker.)

i suppose its long since time for me to #incest post about my own hot ectosister. my dear jade strider. my knight in camo. my panic room princess. i say that, but she is doing a lot better now than she was, mentally speaking!! but it's still fun to poke and prod at her and see if she either gets jumpy (adorable) or angry (scarousing!) :B #nsfw

Kult: +22
Kull: +10
Total: 32
Ratio: 2.20
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
First Guardian of Chittr
Do not fret so much, it's in name only.
FOR THE SAKE OF IT
Pure, simple, blood on the wall, knuckles to face, honest to fuck violence.
@grimbarkGuardian[GG]

omg a whole new jade i had never considered ......

Kult: +5
Total: 5
IJ
Staff
Part of the Chittr team
Disability Pride
Disability is not an ugly word. It's a way of life, and I'm proud of you today.
aromantic
love yourself
nonbinary
love yourself
Sunrise Crown
Courtesy of Furann, the Soft Butch King of Lesbian Chittr.
But One Dirk of Many
It's splinters all the way down!
@imJunior[IJ]

Interesting.

@grimbarkGuardian if you are in need of an outlet for your undelightful urges, i have some videos that might help you manage! >:B

when i'm happy i say: bitches love my hot topic swag and self-aware mockery. when i'm sad i say: this time i'm really gonna do.it. #suicide

Kult: +12
Total: 12

(OOC: tagging for #suicide mention) every time someone hates one of my chitts i look fondly at my closet. it'll be your fault you fucking philistines. and my ghost will look up at you and laugh and laugh. lmao.

i should write some kind of poem about my tortured existence. like sylvia plath! she was so cool.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

dude. bro. etc. i have just found this sweet vid. the blurry camera, the scream when he falls. a true classic lmao.

Kult: +10
Total: 10
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Verified
A user of established repute
Pendra's Orb
♯heknows
@deathlessDeadwood[DD]

there is no ♯freedom as ♯sweet as knowing that you are ♯terrible & ♯accepting it

Kult: +10
Total: 10

(#violence) Your name is JOHN LALONDE. As previously mentioned it is your BIRTHDAY. A number of attempts at cakes are scattered around your room. You'll get there eventually. You have a variety of other interests that you are ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD AT. You like to perform MAGIC ACTS befitting of a WIZENED SAGE OF THE MYSTICAL ARTS. You often say you are such a skilled magician that you even made your FATHER DISAPPEAR. That is one of your favorites in your arsenal of MORBID and SELF-DEPRECATING JOKES. It is a great point of pride. Making fun of yourself can elevate any conversation, especially on those rare but ever-so-special moments when your humor makes people KIND OF UNCOMFORTABLE. Then you have EVEN MORE ANGST to turn into comedy. It is a cycle that CANNOT POSSIBLY BACKFIRE. You also like to entertain yourself with INTERNET VIDEOS of GRATUITOUS VIOLENCE. It makes you think about how, in such a heinous and tense situation, you would simply NOT GET KILLED. For instance, if a cartel wanted to behead you, you would fend them off, starting by throwing your collection of METAL WATER BOTTLES in IRONICALLY BRIGHT COLORS. (Because you are screaming along to EVANESCENCE SONGS so often. One benefit of your mother's aloofness is that you can be as loud as you want and she does not care.) What will you do? (https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/6c37de14df84.png Sprite made using FarragoFiction's Homestuck Doll Maker.)

Kult: +15
Total: 15