Corpse Guy.
@timaeusThreaded
Dave's Brother. But a corpse. Doin tasks for some eldritch guys because I'm not allowed to truly die. I love my truck.
Think I smell like a corpse.
Haven’t spoken to Lamp in a while. Hope she’s still around. She’s a douchebag but she’s cool.
Loud in my head. Jyle is always quiet though.
Wish I could eat food. You assholes don’t know how good you have it.
* well you can talk here! * surely you would have some kind of capability to consume food right..?
No stomach acid. Mostly just bugs in there. For a while I had to shove food in there through the hole in my chest but that’s when one of my hands was alive again.
* hm... * if you think about it the bugs could kinda work like gut biome bacteria..? * no i dont think that really equates to it much at all... * no taste either?
Once I found a squirrel in there. Taste depends on if They want me to.
@trenchantTableau Didn’t know you made an account. The fuck. Post something.
Consider, if the lint that just so happens to be inhabiting your arid and quite frankly bleak head, is capable of such strain to withstand a mere thought that isn’t your own infrequent contemplation, I wanted the liberty to oversee without being hassled for two god damn minutes. I suppose it’s kind of adorable, in an utterly pathetic way, to see you desperate for any semblance of my interaction however. And in public, no less? How fiendish of you.
Oh, I’m sorry. Did my astute observation drive too deep and strike a nerve within your rotting, grotesque and awfully pallid corpse that you, in a frenzied rage, decided to resort to the warm, welcoming bosom of downright childish insults? Really. It’s just becoming more and more pitiful to see the longer you rely upon them. Not that I have much- oh no, allow me to make a correction; I have absolutely no faith that you’d even be able to comprehend saying literally anything else. With all of that free space that makes up the entirety of your regular operating parameters, (your brain- or lack thereof), I would’ve thought that you could’ve at the very least come up with something better other than just a pure lack of creativity.
Man, texting you rather than hearing you out loud really makes me realize how much you don’t shut the fuck up. I take back @ing you. This sucks ass.
You could've simply said that you’d much rather talk to me in person instead; it would’ve gotten your point across all the same.
The lack of denial tells me everything I need to know. And you have the gall to call *me* queer.
Dude I tried ending the conversation like 5 times. How desperate are you for my attention.
Usually you have absolutely to no problem with telling me to fuck off. Think about doing that next time.
Y’all are way worse at this eldritch shit than me. Tryna be all ominous and shit. It’s edgy and dumb. Meanwhile my profile picture is from me googling spooky Halloween images. This shit is on levels of irony your jack o lantern bullshit could never.
There you go. Closer. Bro’s fine, though. Ain’t too fond of Dirk. Kind of a shit name.
I know. I can read. Doesn’t change the fact it’s kind of a shit name. Why the fuck would my name be Brodrick. That’s not a name.
Cool then you’re not the one I need to deal with. Just looking for my Dave’s shitty older brother. And Dirk ain’t the worse name. Trust me.
I’m a pretty shit older brother, so I can play the part if you want. Go punch him around for ya. True. Brodrick is far fucking worse. But Dirk is pretty bad.
Nah I want to find him specifically. Need to before my Dave does. If he finds him he will want him alive despite shit. I have been hunting him down for years though and I’m starting to feel like I’m hitting dead ends. Dave says he’s dead but June thinks he’s alive and I don’t think the bastard would go down easy..
Didn’t ask for your lore dump. Pretty sure Dave should make the choice though. Not you. Vigilante justice is bullshit.
Call it what you want and think what you want. This ain’t me being a vigilante. This is me making sure after I take care of him that I never have to see his ugly bitch ass self again.
Kids are damn ungrateful.
New ‘horrorterror’ I met lately. Gonna name it Taco Bell.
mine's n4med ########################################################## ####
to me it took you 4n 4ge to even reply. 4hem. diverted. 4lso it is my interpret4tion of 4 cognitoh4z4rdous n4me i w4s told th4t i c4n't reuse #
‘Tch. I could slice you into 1000 bits before you could even blink. Life is a game of chess, and I’m always at checkmate.’ Type shit. Goofy.
There’s a bug watching television in my chest.
@turntechGodbird Yo,
[INTRO!] ((I never made an intro post so I figure I will? THIS is an alternate version of Bro Strider. He is canon compliant, until death, where after he died he existed in dreambubbles and eventually made contact with the horrorterrors. He has now been in service of them for quite a damn while, doing arbitrary hyperspecific and often tedious tasks. It's anyones guess if they actually matter. He's a corpse they won't let go of. He also refers to them as nicknames. Tupac, Barbie Girl, Apple Guice, and Big Bird to name a few. There you go :) ))
Namin the dark gods is the most amusin part of workin with em. Cuz you hear somethin like bu'he'ar'bu'g'l'ath or some shit and you can say. Barbie Girl. That's Barbie Girl. And they ain't give a fuck because why would they.
Gay people standing in the way of a shelf I need to knock over.