Karkat Vantas
@cheliformGyves
PYROKINETICS AND SHIT-TALKING EXTRAORDINAIRE. HELPSMAN. MOVIE BUFF. FANFIC WRITER (SAID BEGRUDGINGLY). MESSAGE ME FOR ONE SHOT REQUESTS.
I GOT MY EMPLOYEE MUGSHOT DONE, BECAUSE MY COLLEAGUES DECIDED TO ELECT ME EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. SURELY IT’S ONE BIG FAT JUICY JOKE. HA HA HA. IS THAT WHAT HUMANS SAY WHEN SOMETHING TICKLES THEIR ABSURDITY PALATE? HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/CA33F4BF14EA.JPEG
((hes SO CUTE awwwww))
｢your bulbs... are so... かわいいいいいいいいい~~~~~ kekek!｣ [TRANSLATOR'S NOTE: itaaaaa! the gachikoi way of squealing! ºwº]
IT’S ACTUALLY INCREDIBLE HOW THREE HOURS OF PUBLIC TRANSPORT— THREE BUSES AND A TRAIN, TO BE REAL FUCKING EXACT— CAN STILL SOMEHOW ONLY GET YOU EXACTLY A 47 MINUTE WALK AWAY FROM YOUR HIVE. OH AND IT’S ALSO RAINING.
TW: #pu6lictransp9rtslander #inaccessi6ility #l9c9m9t9n9rmativity #rain
dont know if ive said this before but its all been downhill since i learned the tooth fairy isnt real
I’M REALLY SAD FOR YOU. IT'S HILARIOUS HOW HUMANS WORSHIP THE FANGFAIRY AS A PINNACLE OF HUMAN HEROISM AND VIRTUE BUT IT ISN'T EVEN HUMAN.
me in my lil ol dave corner doin my own thing while everything else around me is on fire and crumbling and filled with buzzsaws and chainsaws and knives and hammers that explode and shit ahhh reminds me of my youth good times good times
THE POWER OF MINDING OUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS IS INCREDIBLE. I THINK MORE PEOPLE SHOULD TRY IT.
I SHOULD REALLY START SEEKING REAL LIFE MUSES. I KEEP GOING AROUND IN CIRCLES, SAME OLD SAME OLD. MAYBE I SHOULD START TALKING TO MORE HUMANS?
never hurts to freshen up your social circles to break outta a rut
I DON’T REALLY HAVE MUCH OF A “SOCIAL CIRCLE” IN THE FIRST PLACE, ADMITTEDLY.
you can change that! go places! talk to people! you're talkin to a new person right now even
perhaps a bit literal, bUt, hello!!
why, thank yoU. ^u^ so, what have yoU been writing? :U
I DO SHIPPING CHART ANALYSIS AND FANWRITTEN WORKS, I TAKE REQUESTS. AND THEN IN MY FREE TIME, I’VE BEEN WRITING A HIGH FANTASY NOVELLA WITH ORIGINAL CHARACTERS.
!!!! oh, how lovely!! we're kindred soUls, yoU and i. i got my start with fanfiction, and i've been writing recreationally my whole life! typically short stories, historical fiction, and narrative nonfiction, bUt i still partake in fandom after all these years! ;U~
SHIT, REALLY? I DON’T KNOW MANY OTHER WRITERS. MAYBE WE COULD COLLAB. OR AT LEAST ROAST PEOPLE’S SHIPPING CHARTS TOGETHER.
crabs bein the final evvolution is a devvastatin revvelation to foot lickers evverywwhere #nsfww #toepostin
I WAS GOING TO VENTURE FOR YOU TO EXPLAIN THIS BUT ACTUALLY NEVER MIND.
i d0n't even know where t0 start with this place, so i w0n't.
THIS IS FUCKING *EXACTLY* WHAT I SAID TOO. WHO THE FUCK IS PEANUT? AND WHY IS HE TAGGING RANDOM SHIT WITH NSFW.
i d0n't know wh0 peanut is, i've been in the building f0r less than a hour, i'll get back to y0u when i care enough to kn0w.
yeah y0u're a kk alright. have some independence, get 0ut there and learn or s0me shit.
“A” KK THEY SAY, AS IF I’M NOT ***THE*** KK. YOU SHOULD LEARN OR SOME SHIT, PARTICULARLY ABOUT OUR ANCESTRAL PATHS, YOU HEINOUS UNDULATING ASSHOLE.
Https://1.post1mg.cc/yq6k4cqt/scr33nshot-20260513-124005.png why Th3 Fuck Do Hum4ns H4v3 4ll Th3 B3st Courtroom M3d14 Th3 Fuck
JUDGE JOE BROWN IS MY GUILTY PLEASURE, YOU HAVE GOOD TASTE.
OKAY. NOT MY LAST POST, IT SEEMS. CHITTR IS A CESSPOOL OF BARFSHITTING CROTCHSTAINS, SO I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO STAY HERE TO MAKE UP FOR THE ACTUAL WORD VOMIT SPEWAGE YOU ALL SEEM TO BE PARTAKING IN.
its moreso this place has a bunch of people from several different timelines. and trust me. i know my shit about timelines
CLEARLY ME TOO, SINCE I SOMEHOW SEEM TO BE MIXING WITH A MILLION DIFFERENT VERSIONS OF ME AND MY APPARENT DESCENDANTS. TRULY NAUSEATING.