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KARKAT

@cheliformGyves

SHIT-TALKING EXTRAORDINAIRE. HELPSMAN. MOVIE BUFF. WRITER. NEED A CULLMOMMY? GET IN LINE. BEFORUS HE/HIM 400k HICAPOINTS, FUCK YOU.

Blood: LimeAge: 26 years12 sweepsKult Score: 4301Kull Score: 307752 followers 43 following

♥ liked ♠ hated ♦ pitied ♣ mediated

ORIGINAL CHITTS|REPLIES

@cheliformGyves[CG]

PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS ASKING ME THIS. I THINK IT SHOULD JUST REMAIN A FUCKING MYSTERY. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/EDDE774ED895.JPEG

Kult: +62

Kull: +35

Total: 97

Ratio: 1.77

@tenderTelegnosis[TT]

default state for green folks, duh?

Kult: +10

Total: 10

↩ @tenderTelegnosis[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

MY CHITTRTAG SHOULD JUST BE GREENCUNT AT THIS POINT.

Kult: +10

Total: 10

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@tenderTelegnosis[TT]

THAT RULES OMG!

Kult: +5

Total: 5

Deejay Harley-Strider

@dogwoodJackal[DJ]

man at least keep my name in the pic! >8V

Kult: +7

Total: 7

↩ @dogwoodJackal[DJ]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I DIDN’T KNOW IF YOU WANTED CREDIT FOR BEING A DICKHEAD SUPREME. BUT CLEARLY YOU DO. HEY EVERYONE, GET A LOAD.

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

Deejay Harley-Strider

@dogwoodJackal[DJ]

ok look for context THIS is what my karkat looks like. you can see my fucking confusion!!

↩ @dogwoodJackal[DJ]

Deejay Harley-Strider

@dogwoodJackal[DJ]

i mean listen i respect it!! i fuck with the vibe, it's fun!!! it's just like. really surreal... ._.

@cheliformGyves[CG]

NO. NO IT’S FINE, I AM A LOTUS. I AM A *FUCKING* LOTUS AND I AM SO NORMAL.

Kult: +4

Total: 4

@cheliformGyves[CG]

FUCK I AM SO MAD I THINK I COULD ACTUALLY DIE. THEY AREN’T GONNA EVEN HAVE TO CULL ME, I’LL JUST KEEL OVER RIGHT HERE. FUCK THE TRIAL. DON’T NEED IT.

Kult: +19

Kull: +10

Total: 29

Ratio: 1.90

Deejay Harley-Strider

@dogwoodJackal[DJ]

why are you green and cunty...

E%emplar Dank100k

@caballinesTheca[CT]

D --> What is wrong

Kult: +2

Kull: +2

Total: 4

Ratio: 1.00

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YEAH NO IT’S SUPER PLATONIC.

Kult: +9

Total: 9

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YOU SCHMOOZE YOU LOSE. @CABALLINESTHECA , THANKS FOR REINING ME IN. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/482514861B02.JPEG HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/B4ADC37670F7.JPEG

@caballinesTheca

Kult: +91

Kull: +71

Total: 162

Ratio: 1.28

Hephaestus Zahhak

@craftsmanToxophilite[CT]

8=l < You two are quite adorable

E%emplar Dank100k

@caballinesTheca[CT]

D --> I was not aware this was taken

Kult: +14

Total: 14

YOU LOOK LIKE AN EXPENSIVE WHORE.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @caballinesTheca[CT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YOU CAN THANK @ANONYMOUSECATALOG FOR THAT.

@anonymouseCatalog

Kult: +11

Total: 11

↩ @handMaid[HM]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

THAT WOULD BE BECAUSE I AM, DIPSHIT.

Kult: +7

Kull: +2

Total: 9

Ratio: 3.50

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@anonymouseCatalog[AC]

:33 < Mrrp!!

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @anonymouseCatalog[AC]

E%emplar Dank100k

@caballinesTheca[CT]

D --> Hm.

@arachnoidGrimorium[AG]

@cavalierThorough8red How the ta8les turn, hm?

@cavalierThoroughbred

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@cheliformGyves[CG]

FUCK, HE’S JUST SO. FUCK. VAGUEPOST. SEND CHIT.

Kult: +19

Total: 19

@cheliformGyves[CG]

THE STUPIDITY OF SOME PEOPLE TRULY, *TRULY* ASTOUNDS ME SOMETIMES. IT’S LIKE I’M EXPECTING SOCIETY AT LARGE TO LOCK IN AND THEY’RE ALWAYS LOCKED SO FAR OUT THAT NOT EVEN THE LONGEST SKELETON KEY COULD EVEN HOPE TO REACH THE PADLOCK.

Kult: +29

Total: 29

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I CAN’T LAUGH YET. BUT I JUST LEARNED SOMETHING ABOUT MY CASE THAT’S GONNA FUCKING FLIP EVERYTHING ON ITS HEAD.

Kult: +9

Total: 9

@cheliformGyves[CG]

SO-CALLED FREE THINKERS WHEN THEY SLEEP IN TOO LATE AND END UP WITH MAJOR BED HEAD. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/B82044B23B0A.JPEG #SUGGESTIVE

Kult: +60

Kull: +22

Total: 82

Ratio: 2.73

WHORE.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @handMaid[HM]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I’M COUNTING MY BITCHES AND ORGANIZING THEM BY COLOR.

Kult: +5

Kull: +5

Total: 10

Ratio: 1.00

@cheliformGyves[CG]

FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGG SHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTT.

Kult: +2

Total: 2

@cheliformGyves[CG]

NONE OF THAT SHIT IS TRUE. I’VE JUST GOTTEN OFF OF HIVE ARREST AND THIS IS HOW I’M TREATED. I THINK I NEED TO JOIN A BOXING CLASS.

Kult: +8

Total: 8

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I WOULD COMMIT INSANE, DEPRAVED ACTS FOR A PINT OF ICE CREAM RIGHT NOW. LIKE THE KIND WITH LITTLE GRUB PIECES IN IT WITH THE CARAMEL SAUCE. OHHHHHHHMYFUCKINGGOD.

Kult: +89

Kull: +52

Total: 141

Ratio: 1.71

@cheliformGyves[CG]

PLEASE SOMEONE BUY IT FOR ME. I WILL DO INSANE DEPRAVED THINGS TO YOU.

KAR VANTAS. \:B

@ultimateGenarch[UG]

OUHHHHH FUCCCKKKKK I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT...BEST KIND OUT THERE...

Scarab Lord Rose Belvedere Lalonde

@therapistofThedeep[TT]

Check your transportalizer pad.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@technicallyTimaeus[TT]

You freaks sincerely cannot be real. And is the caramel made of baby insect cerebrospinal fluid? Buncha fuckin' Cronenbergs. #Yuck.

#gore #cannibalism #yuck #canon-typical-cannibalism

↩ @technicallyTimaeus[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

“INSENSITIVE TO TROLL CULTURE” IS ALL I’M SEEING ON YOUR BIO. BOO, YOU WHORE. YES IT’S THAT CARAMEL.

Kull: +5

Total: 5

↩ @therapistofThedeep[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I SWEAR YOU’RE TRYING TO FATTEN ME UP. FIRST THE CHOCOLATE AND NOW THIS.

Kult: +2

Total: 2

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@technicallyTimaeus[TT]

"Judge me by the enemies I have made." —American Sports Legend Wayne Gretzky.

Kull: +2

Total: 2

whorin urself out 4 icecream is such a power move tbh, im noting this shit down ✍️

↩ @voidedOut[VO]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

WHO SAID I WAS DOING THAT. INSANE AND DEPRAVED SHIT CAN BE ANYTHING.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@cheliformGyves[CG]

DO YOU NEED A #CULLMOMMY? HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/3262FD57E1C1.JPEG HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/1684BE9DC34D.JPEG HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/30B2A88B66F6.JPEG #NSFW #BEFORANCULLING

#nsfw #beforanculling #cullmommy

Kult: +211

Kull: +166

Total: 377

Ratio: 1.27

↩ @glaukopisCanary[GC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

SHIT, TOUGH CROWD. I’M LITERALLY FINE. I’M OFF HIVE ARREST, I’VE TURNED A NEW LEAF. AND BESIDES, THIS WAS MY OLD GIG.

Kult: +2

Total: 2

↩ @aeneasCaldarium[AC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

(;B

@caligulasAquarium[CA]

maybe i been too rash in my frequent and scornful commentary about beforus

Kult: +9

Total: 9

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

Songbird Sootnose

@glaukopisCanary[GC]

F1NE, F1NE, 1 *GUE22* 1M HAPPY THAT YOURE NOT 6EH1ND 6AR2, AT H1VE OR OTHERW12E. WHAT 12 1T YOURE DO1NG NOW, ANYWAY?

↩ @caligulasAquarium[CA]

@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

you gotta learn to open not just your ocular globes, but also open your mind to the beauty before you.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @glaukopisCanary[GC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I’M WORKING AS A SCREENWRITER ON FREELANCE, ACTUALLY. BELIEVE IT OR NOT.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @aeneasCaldarium[AC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

HE SAYS FROM EXPERIENCE.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

Songbird Sootnose

@glaukopisCanary[GC]

HEHEHE, NOT 6AD, NOT 6AD AT ALL KARKLE2. 1 ALWAY2 F1GURED YOU WERE 6ETTER 2U1TED FOR THAT 2ORT OF TH1NG.

↩ @glaukopisCanary[GC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I CAN SEND YOU SOME OF IT IF YOU CARE TO READ IT.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

Songbird Sootnose

@glaukopisCanary[GC]

WHY NOT? 1 COULD U2E 2OME EARLY MORN READ1NG MATER1AL.

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I JUST GOT THE PRINTS IN FROM THE PHOTOSHOOT I DID RECENTLY. YOU’RE ALL IN FOR A FUCKING TREAT.

Kult: +50

Kull: +10

Total: 60

Ratio: 5.00

Neeiht Megane・✿

@gachikoisChic[GC]

｢(ФωФ) kekeke...｣

↩ @gachikoisChic[GC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YEAH. YOU ESPECIALLY I’M SURE.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@cheliformGyves[CG]

MY #HIVEARREST ENDS TOMORROW. THANK FUCK. NEVERMIND THAT THIS MEANS MY CULLING BLOCK HEARING IS COMING UP. WE DON’T NEED TO THINK ABOUT THAT.

Kult: +31

Kull: +25

Total: 56

Ratio: 1.24

@chillerAficionado[CA]

Bro you are going to get beforan culled

Kult: +4

Total: 4

↩ @chillerAficionado[CA]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

ARE YOU PUTTING YOURSELF FORWARD AS MY CULLDADDY? AT LEAST BUY ME A SCALDING LEAF FLUID FIRST.

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@chillerAficionado[CA]

Would you call me daddy

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @chillerAficionado[CA]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I’LL THINK ABOUT IT REALLY HARD.

@cheliformGyves[CG]

@ANONYMOUSECATALOG JUST POSTED THIS CANDID OF ME GETTING BENT OVER AND ROYALLY COMPLETELY FUCKED. WHAT’S THE VERDICT? HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/7475E40B072A.JPG #SUGGESTIVE #HIVEARREST

@anonymouseCatalog

#hivearrest #suggestive

Kult: +158

Kull: +108

Total: 266

Ratio: 1.46

↩ @therapistofThedeep[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YOU KNOW, THERE’S A GOOD ASS REASON FOR THE CENSOR BAR. BUT SCORNHUB PROBABLY HAS IT.

Kult: +12

Total: 12

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

Scarab Lord Rose Belvedere Lalonde

@therapistofThedeep[TT]

It's blocked on Earth-C, sadly.

Kult: +2

Kull: +5

Total: 7

Ratio: 0.40

↩ @therapistofThedeep[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

CRUEL 34? PAPTUBE EVEN?

Kult: +10

Kull: +5

Total: 15

Ratio: 2.00

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@technicallyTimaeus[TT]

Have no fear. It's on #PlushRump. Subscribers only.

Kult: +10

Total: 10

↩ @technicallyTimaeus[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

OF COURSE IT’S THERE. FIVE SECONDS AFTER IT’S BEEN POSTED TOO.

Kult: +12

Total: 12

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@technicallyTimaeus[TT]

Not my first time peeling away a censor bar to monetize the surprise inside, and it won't be the last. You're in good company. #SorryDirk. #NotThatSorry.

#sorrydirk #notthatsorry

↩ @technicallyTimaeus[TT]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

WAS IT WORTH IT AT LEAST?

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@technicallyTimaeus[TT]

Couldn't say. You are all ants to me. Shall I poll the sickos? EDIT: Thoughts on troll nipples? Positive █████████ 69% Neutral ████ 13% Negative ███ 11% Other █ 7%

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@turntableGangster[TG]

damn you werent kidding that things got its own zip code its own area code bet it has diplomatic immunity in several countries across various state lines cop walked past you and felt a change in air pressure thats shits its own goddamn weather event newton himself is rolling in his grave trying to figure out how something with that mass moves that smooth that ass has its own gravitational pull and im a fucking satellite drifting past minding my business and suddenly im in orbit slingshotting between two globular cheeks like an ass hair in a fart nasas gonna have questions that i dont have answers to

Kult: +7

Kull: +7

Total: 14

Ratio: 1.00

↩ @technicallyTimaeus[TT]

@turntableGangster[TG]

do you do family discounts

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@cheliformGyves[CG]

THE #HIVEARREST SAGA CONTINUES. I AM SO FUCKING BORED, AND CONSIDERING GNAWING OFF MY ANKLE MONITOR LIKE A BARK BEAST IN FEAR OF ITS OWN LIFE. IN LIGHT OF THAT: COMMENT YOUR GENRE OF TASTE AND I’LL MATCH YOU WITH A SONG. I’M THE SONG DOCTOR. ASIDE FROM VILEGIRL, WHO IS THE SONG DOCTOR BRAIN PROFESSOR.

Kult: +4

Total: 4

@cheliformGyves[CG]

NEW SHOES CAME IN TODAY. SO FUCKING CUTE. IGNORE THE UGLY HIVE ARREST BRACELET. HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/SXVB136/HOUSE-ARREST.GIF #FLASHING #HIVEARREST @HANDMAID

#hivearrest #flashing

Kult: +123

Kull: +51

Total: 174

Ratio: 2.41

THE SPIKES SHOULD BE ON THE FRONT. FOR MORE EFFECTIVE #SLUGSTOMPING. #SUGGESTIVE. #SUGGESTIVEOFYOUSTOMPINGONHISSLUG.

#nsfw #slugstomping #suggestiveofyoustompingonhisslug #suggestive

Kult: +7

Total: 7

↩ @handMaid[HM]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YOU’RE SO FUCKING RIGHT ABOUT THAT. I’LL ADD THEM TO THE BOTTOM LIKE CLEATS. @CABALLINESTHECA XO.

@caballinesTheca

Kult: +12

Kull: +7

Total: 19

Ratio: 1.71

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

E%emplar Dank100k

@caballinesTheca[CT]

D --> Gulp

Kult: +17

Total: 17

@anonymouseCatalog[AC]

:33 < STEAMING HOT MEWS!! Karkat Vantas on alleged hive arrest!!! :33 < S33n here flaunting a pair of new boots! :33 < Could they be furom his alleged "#SugarCullDaddy?"

#sugarculldaddy

Kult: +10

Total: 10

↩ @anonymouseCatalog[AC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

HE DID BUY ME THESE ACTUALLY. GOT ME THERE.

Kult: +10

Total: 10

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@anonymouseCatalog[AC]

:33 < I mew it!!

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@aspiringPessimist[AP]

#fugitiveslay

Kult: +5

Total: 5

@cheliformGyves[CG]

ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR WHAT A CERTAIN POOR LONELY KARKAT CAN DO WHEN HE’S BEEN BANISHED TO HIVE ARREST?

Kult: +38

Kull: +25

Total: 63

Ratio: 1.52

@composedGrievances[CG]

Cr9chet 9r 6readmaking. 69th rewarding in their 9wn rights.

Sollux "Thorax" Captor

@twinAmnesias[TA]

the only adviice II have ii2 plea2e for fuck2 2ake don't blow up your computer or run any funny code becau2e you are bored and/or angry

@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

invwite someone ovwer ;) (me)

↩ @aeneasCaldarium[AC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YEAH ALRIGHT. COME ON THEN.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

putting on the larry outfit right nowv, hmu vwith the address svweet thing.

Kult: +2

Total: 2

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I GOT BAILED OUT. EVERYONE POUR ONE OUT FOR THE BITCH STILL IN THERE, THOUGH.

Kult: +74

Kull: +50

Total: 124

Ratio: 1.48

YOU SHOULD BE #BEFORANCULLED. DUE TO MAJOR PERSONALITY DEFECTS.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @handMaid[HM]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

TELL IT TO THE JUDGE.

Kult: +5

Total: 5

↩ @cheliformGyves[CG]

@carmineGnosiology YOUR #FEMBOY #ANCESTOR SHOULD HAVE BEEN #BEFORANCULLED. BEFORE HIS #MYRIAD #FLAWS COULD BE PASSED DOWN TO YOU. THROUGH HIS #FETID #SLURRY. HOW'S THAT. THE JUDGIEST TROLL I KNOW.

@carmineGnosiology

#flaws #nsfw #ancestor #fetid #myriad #femboy #slurry #beforanculled

Kull: +5

Total: 5

@zoologerCoolscar[ZC]

holy shit wwhat evven happened

↩ @zoologerCoolscar[ZC]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

I’LL MESSAGE YOU. THEY TAPPED MY SOCIALS.

Kult: +7

Total: 7

↩ @handMaid[HM]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

FUCK YOU, YOU UGLY GNARLED RICKETY BITCH. I’LL SEE YOU TONIGHT. XOXO.

Kult: +5

Kull: +10

Total: 15

Ratio: 0.50

↩ @handMaid[HM]

@carmineGnosiology[CG]

My ancest9r? Y9u are 96vi9usly mistaken. In case y9u haven't n9ticed, this pers9n is a lime6l99d. I am n9t. That he happens t9 share the same name as my dancest9r is either a c9incidence 9r a matter 9f alternate timeline hem9spectral discrepancies, 6ut I am *n9t* related t9 any tr9lls wh9 identify as lime and theref9re claim n9 relati9n t9 this tr9ll. Whether he "sh9uld have" 6een #6ef9ranCulled 9r n9t is n9ne 9f my 6usiness. #TimelineDiscrepancies #6l99dswaps #MistakenIdentity #N9wCanY9uSt9pTaggingMeInRand9mP9sts #ImTryingT9Enj9yAVacati9n

#timelinediscrepancies #nowcanyoustoptaggingmeinrandomposts #mistakenidentity #imtryingtoenjoyavacation #bloodswaps #beforanculled

Kull: +2

Total: 2

↩ @carmineGnosiology[CG]

OK. I'LL STOP. THERE. I DID YOU A FAVOR. NOW IT'S YOUR TURN TO BE POLITE AND OBEDIENT. TURN YOUR LOCATION ON. 0u0

Kult: +5

Kull: +2

Total: 7

Ratio: 2.50

↩ @carmineGnosiology[CG]

@cheliformGyves[CG]

YEAH @HANDMAID , I’M A LIME. OBVIOUSLY. BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY EVERYONE KNOWS THIS INFORMATION AND NOT ANYTHING ABOUT ANY OTHER POSSIBILITIES. NO RELATION, IM NOT DOING A PATERNITY TEST.

Kult: +2

Total: 2