

KARKAT
@cheliformGyves
SHIT-TALKING EXTRAORDINAIRE. HELPSMAN. MOVIE BUFF. WRITER. NEED A CULLMOMMY? GET IN LINE. BEFORUS HE/HIM 400k HICAPOINTS, FUCK YOU.
IS THIS TOO MUCH FOR MY QUADFINDR PROFILE? BE HONEST. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/DC3071C3295E.JPEG #SUGGESTIVE
I’VE TAKEN TO STUDYING SUBJECTS OF WHICH I’M UNFAMILIAR IN AN ATTEMPT TO NO LONGER EAT MY WORDS WHEN I SAY I’M SMARTER THAN ALL OF YOU SOPPING WET SHITBAGS WITH A HOWLING WIND PASSING BETWEEN YOUR AURALDUCTS WHERE YOUR SPONGES SHOULD BE. FIRST UP: BEFORAN MEDICULL PRACTICE. DOES THIS COUNT AS #MEDICULLCHITTR? AM I GOING TO BE A HOT NURSE WITH HORRIBLE BEDSIDE MANNER?

That Is How I Know I Was Much More Vile And Cruel Back Then- I Had A Blunt Bang.
IM FEELING LIKE CAUSING SOME TROUBLE TONIGHT, BUT I’LL BE ON MY BEST BEHAVIOR. MAYBE.
D --> It is time D --> The clock struck 7:24 D --> The E%emplary Comfort Plush Doll is now available for purchase for a limited time D --> Due to intervention from a certain individual, these are simply plush dolls D --> With no additional features D --> However D --> They make an e%cellent addition to any living space D --> Place it upon your firemantle D --> Set it in your entertainment chair D --> Display it alongside your trophies
FUCK. YES. HAPPY FUCKING FRIDAY. I AM ABOUT TO GET SO DRUNK OFF MY FACE AND SHAKE MAJOR ASS. #LETSGO
WHAT’S A POOR GUY GOT TO DO TO GET A MECHANIC AROUND HERE? I’M FUCKING STRANDED.
I LOOK BETTER THAN BOTH OF THOSE IDIOTS. BY A LONG SHOT. I’M JUST GRIMACING BECAUSE THE BEFORISH ONE SMELLS LIKE LYNX BODY SPRAY.

BEHOLD. THE FAMILY PORTRAIT. KINDA. WE SOMEHOW MANAGED TO GET ALL OF US IN THE SAME ROOM. THE GREEN ONE AND I LITERALLY COULDN’T STAND THE STUPID BRITISH FUCK FOR MORE THAN ABOUT FIVE MINUTES. THIS WILL BE THE ONLY PICTURE OF ALL THREE OF US TO PROBABLY EVER EXIST, SO YUCK IT UP.
MY USUAL MAKEUP ISN’T COVERING UP MY EYE BAGS LIKE IT USED TO. EITHER I’M STRUNG OUT, OR THE FORMULA’S CHANGED. I’M GOING TO CONVINCE MYSELF IT’S THE LATTER.
OK, NO, I’M TOTALLY NOT DEEPLY HURT BY THAT, IT’S FINE. I JUST WANNA GO ON VACATION. TO A LOVELY REMOTE ISLAND. I WANT TO WADE INTO THE WARM SURF. AND THEN PULL OUT A HARPOON AND SHOOT MYSELF IN THE FACE WITH IT.
YOUR HIGHNESS. DAMN, I COULD GET USED TO THAT.
YOU GUYS ARE NOT FUCKING READY FOR WHAT HAYAAH AND I ARE COOKING UP. MY GOD.

i complain in a more virtuous and ethical way than other people
DO YOU GUYS THINK THOSE GERRY GRUBS THINGS ARE ACTUALLY GOOD. THEY LOOK LIKE THEY GO CRAZY.
IN MY SPARE TIME TODAY, I GOT TO VISIT @ZOOLOGERCOOLSCAR FOR SOME REVISIONS ON THEIR RESEARCH. CALL ME LEARNED, CALL ME CHARISMATIC, CALL ME THE LABSLUT. ALL APPLY.

࣪⊹₊˚{ wowwww! do you ever feel like you sea a meme that is like.... unbaleenably targeted? like, COMPLEECHLY targeted towards you? }*A*{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪ ࣪⊹₊˚{ i do all the time! because this one is LITERALLLLY ME! like, there i am! + im thinking about those deep sea grumblr-powering ATOLL TIMES }>7<{ }>7<{ }>7<{ #literaleechme #hicacontent #cullquette #justgirlyfins }˚₊⊹ ࣪
CALLED TROTSWORX, ENDED UP WITH THIS GUY. BREAKING A STALLION IS SO REWARDING.
WHAT A FINE, FINE #TIETHEMUPTUESDAY. NOT A #TIEMEUPTUESDAY, BECAUSE I’M NOT THE ONE WITH THEIR FRONDS TIED BEHIND THEIR BACK. POOR BABY. EVERYONE SEND @CABALLINESTHECA THEIR PITY. HE’S GONNA NEED IT.
RIGHT STRAIGHT HOURS OF PAPERWORK. MY PAN FEELS LIKE I’VE PUT AN IMMERSION BLENDER INSIDE IT.





























