♥ liked by @disciplinedCataclysm
🐾why did the siNger Need a ladder? well, they had to fiNd some way to 'reach the high Notes'! ehehe, hehe,
🐾#sUbstaNces || httPs://i.Postimg.cc/jsmcbhcz/hUNdsi-defdrUNk-atthebar.PNg 's sooo mUch fUN here !! x) x) ehehe, 's so chill 'ere 'N tastes Nice x) 🐾✨ thaNks ta amU for telliN' me 'boUt this sPot, real great bUddy 's sUPer cool 'N awesomeee x) hehe,
🐾"jUst oNe last meal before i hit the 'cUPe!" i say, so coNfideNtly as i hold the PaN to fliP my eggs oNly to watch iN Utter horror as Not oNly do i *miss* the PaN, bUt it also laNds oNto the grill aNd immediately catches *fire*. rUiNiN' the stovetoP, my food, aNd PissiN' off my hivestem maNager 'N Neighbors with the chaos 'x( maybe this is why i'm a comediaN aNd Not a cook!! golly... had oNe job aNd weNt UP 'N blew it! 'x( hehe,
🐾how do sNails fight? well, they go 'N 'slUg' it oUt! hehe,
🐾#sUbstaNces (meNtioN) || i boUght some sNeakers from a, ehehe, 'dealer'.... i dUNNo what he laced them with, bUt i’ve beeN "triPPiNg' all day! x) (i am Perfectly sober, bUt will be headed oUt sooN for a regUlar driNk! :]) hehe,
🐾i’d tell ya the joke aboUt Perforated PaPer... bUt it’s 'tear-able'! hehe,
🐾ehehe, got Pretty distracted earlier... my bad folks! x) i still had some more stUff to get throUgh from wayyy earlier so here we go! hate to have left these aNswered from a coUPle hoUrs ago, 🐾❔[qNa, @disciPliNedcataclysm - how do yoU maNage to so coNsisteNtly be as lovely as yoU are? ]❔🐾 aww, woNder who this haNdsome fella is who left this here for lil' ol' me! hmm, i dUNNo! mUst be a big faN x)! totally,, hehe. 'm tryNa be ProfessioNal 'ere! Nahhh... jUst kiddiN', i'm doiN' all this for the love of the game. why do ya thiNk i doN't have a maNager or goNe cooPerate yet? sNrrrk... gosh i doN't eveN got mUch for this oNe. 's Pretty sUbjective if ya ask me. i aPPreciate ya beiN' real sweet to me thoUgh! ehehe. i jUst go 'N do my best, stick to what i like 'N what i kNow, 'N... yeah! boriN' i kNow, thaNks for droPPiN' that by <3 ehehe, i'll stoP beiN' all saPPy 'N stUff 'ere Now! httPs://i.Postimg.cc/3rmPdsmw/hUNdsi-qNa2-flUshed.PNg #hUNdsiqNa #qNa hehe,
🐾folks still doiN' the whole qUestioNs roUtiNe? well coUNt me iN x) ehehe, why Not? 's good fUN by the looks of it! httPs://forms.gle/z7tjsm3s728gqtjy9 hehe,
🐾why shoUld ya Never trUst a PersoN writiN' oN graPh PaPer? 'caUse they'll be 'PlottiNg' somethiNg! x) hehe,
🐾what'cha call two math-loviN' fellas who are Pals? ehehe, why ya call 'em 'alge'bros''! hehe,
🐾gosh, how does oNe simUltaNeoUsly waNNa cUrl UP 'N get some shUteye Nice 'N cozy-like, bUt theN also waNts to restlessly Pace 'roUNd 'N keeP yaPPiN'? x( this gal caN Never make her thiNkPaN UP! hehe,
🐾y'kNow that bUddy i'd meNtioNed who helPed Patch me UP 'N all? ehehe, well, i told 'em: "hey, y'kNow i still kiNda hUrt iN a few Places..." so they weNt 'N told me to stoP goiN' to those Places! ehehe x) hehe,
🐾ehehe gUess this gal coNked oUt wheN she didN't meaN to! still wakiN' UP ehehe, will get some jokes ready real sooN x) hehe,
🐾what kiNda lizard tells the best jokes? ehehe... a ''staNd-UP chameleoN''! hehe,
🐾i kNow folks who've Never trUsted lizards right from the ''gecko''! ehehe, hehe,
🐾what is a barkbeast's favorite breakfast item? ehehe... ''Pooched'' eggs! hehe,
🐾bwoofma accideNtally ate some saNdPaPer the other Night... it was a little 'rUff'! ehehe... (she's fiNe!!) hehe,
🐾why are there No losers iN a dachshUNd barkbeast race? well, it's 'caUse they’re all 'weiNers'! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of tea is hard to swallow? ehehe, well, PersoNally i thiNk it'd be... ''reality''! see what i did there? x) hehe,
🐾i caN’t staNd NestiNg dolls... they’re so 'fUll of themselves'! ehehe, hehe,
🐾i’d tell y'all chemistry joke, bUt i kNow i woUldN’t get a 'reactioN' oUtta aNyoNe! ehehe, hehe,
((OOC - Hiii! Not perished, crazy I know. Hundsi is alive and well, just busy! So, she hasn't been posting. I will, however, put something here in the meantime until she's back. More stuff of her lusus! <3 Bwoofma,,)) https://i.postimg.cc/jjtYFw9m/Bwoofma-cameo.jpg
🐾what did the broNzeblood say wheN she came back aroUNd? Uh, Not mUch! aside from aN aPology to aNyoNe who's beeN woNderiN' where she vaNished to, ehehe... sorry folks! doN't got a joke liNed UP this qUick iN the middle of thiNgs. beeN kePt awfUl bUsy this last while, 'N it's goNNa be like that for a bit loNger... hoPe y'all have beeN well! yoUr regUlarly schedUled jokes from yoUrs trUly will be back real sooN, Promise x) hehe,
🐾ehehe, got some time to myself! gosh talk aboUt iNcoNsisteNcy... bUt i'm here to share jokes, Not my PersoNal life. sorry folks! bUt atleast a gal caN mUltitask! x) httPs://i.Postimg.cc/rfs0fzNz/wolf-sNiff.gif Now, what'cha call a wolf that gets lost ofteN? why, ya go 'N call that a ''where''wolf! sNrrrk, ehehe! hehe,
🐾what's a wolf's favorite PlaNt? why, it'd be aN ''aroo-gUla''! hehe,
🐾what do yoU call aN oblivioUs diNosaUr? eheh, "doyoUthiNkhesaUrUs"! hehe,
🐾why coUldN’t the Pirate fiNd their PlayiNg cards? well, it's 'caUse they were staNdiN' oN the ''deck''! hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/02rk1zvx/dalmatiaN-barkbeast-movieref.gif what did the dalmatiaN say after it fiNished a hefty meal? "woof, well... that hit the 'sPot'"! hehe, eheh! hehe,
🐾why shoUldN't ya tell secrets iN a corNfield? well, it's 'caUse there's too maNy 'ears' aroUNd! sNrrrk! hehe,
🐾waNNa hear a coNstrUctioN joke? awh, actUally... i’m still ''workiNg oN it''! ehehe, hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/xyx79bNk/barkbeast-tailwag.gif how maNy hairs are iN a barkbeast's tail? Pfft NoNe! they’re all oN the oUtside of it! x) hehe,
🐾why was the barkbeast sUch a good story teller? he kNew how to ''Paws'' for dramatic effect! hehe,
🐾what’s aN artist’s favorite shoe braNd? ehehe, whyz it'd be 'sketchers'! hehe,
(( FUMBLED so HARD OOC !! Corrected now but that's embarrassing 💔💔 head in hands rn oops!! She would never!! Mistake from mun scrolling the feed and not double checking if they pressed a button by mistake!! ))
🐾told this oNe some time ago, bUt it's a gUilty favorite so i'm giviN' it aNother shot x) 🐾✨ a werewolf walks iNto a bar. .. the barteNder says, “what’s it like beiNg a werewolf?” the werewolf says, “i haveN’t beeN oNe for very loNg, bUt i’m ''lycaN'' it so far."! hehe,
🐾did'ya hear the oNe aboUt the crow aNd the telePhoNe Pole? he waNted to make a loNg distaNce 'caw'! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of math do owls like? why, i heard they're Pretty foNd of "'owl'gebra" iN ParticUlar! ehehe, hehe,
🐾"so... i have rabies?" a troll asks. the medicUller sqUiNts, before cUrtly resPoNdiNg"short aNswer, yes." with a grim Nod. "w- well, what's the loNg aNswer?" "...yeeeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss." hehe,
🐾why did the moNkey like the baNaNa? becaUse it had 'aP-Peel'! hehe,
🐾how do yoU measUre a sNake? iN iNches... they doN’t have feet! ehehe x) hehe,
🐾what time does a qUackbeast wake UP? at the ''qUack'' of dUsk! hehe,
🐾what haPPeNed wheN the raNcher crossed his moobeasts with some hyeNas? it was the 'laUghiNg stock' of the farm! hehe,
🐾what is a barkbeast that sNeezes? well, ya woUld call that aN 'a-choo-wawa'! ehehe x) hehe,
🐾why are bread jokes fUNNy? 'caUse they Never get 'm-old'! hehe,
🐾what'cha call someoNe who has a lot of miNioNs? a 'miNioN-aire'! x) hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/fwjkgsgd/barkbeast-with-da-bread.gif what did the baker say wheN she foUNd her lost doUgh? that’s exactly what i 'kNeaded'! hehe,
🐾did'cha hear aboUt the clUckbeast Proof lawN? yeah, i heard it was real 'im-Peck-able'! ehehe, hehe,
🐾i had a crafty bUddy who Used to tell me, "as oNe door closes, aNother oNe oPeNs.” which i thiNk is jUst lovely! ... UNfortUNately terrible carPeNter thoUgh! ehehe, x) hehe,
🐾what'cha call a barkbbeast that desigNs bUildiNgs? a ''bark-itect''! ehehe! hehe,
.... Okay I need a lil bit more to drink I'm starting to get sober and I do not need that emotional mess right now
🐾what'cha call yoUNg barkbeasts who Play iN the sNow? yoU call 'em 'slUsh PUPPies'! ehehe, hehe,
🐾what kiNd of barkbeast caN jUmP higher thaN a bUildiNg? all kiNds caN! ehehe... 'caUse bUildiNgs caN’t jUmP! x) hehe,
🐾was lookiN' after a blacksmith's barkbeast lUsUs, bUt as sooN as we got hive, it made a 'bolt' for the door! x) hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/65zmqt8j/faNcy-barkbeast.gif threw a ball for a barkbeast... it’s a bit extravagaNt i kNow, bUt it was his sPecial day aNd he looks great iN a diNNer jacket! hehe,
🐾bUddy of miNe asked if i had seeN the barkbeast bowl... i said, “No, i didN’t eveN kNow she coUld!" hehe,
[There was once a joke here, something about a wrangler and his horse, but it seems Hundsi has since gone back and redacted it...]
🐾what kiNd of scUttlebUggy does a barkbeast drive? why, it'd be a 'fUr-rari'! hehe,
🐾#Nsfw | what was the Problem with the origami PailiNg chaNNel? it was 'PaPer-view' oNly! ehehe, hehe,
🐾what do yoU do if a barkbeast chews yoUr dictioNary? well, ya go aNd 'take the words right oUt of his moUth'! hehe,
🐾what is a barkbeast's favorite kiNd of flavor disc? 'PUPPeroNi'! hehe,
🐾most folks doN’t like hoofbeast jokes, so gUess most coUld say i’m goiNg agaiNst the 'reiN' oN this oNe, ehe! why are hoofbeasts terrible at stayiN' UP late? wheN it’s 'PastUre' bedtime, they’re ready to hit the 'hay'! hehe,
🐾Used to Play PiaNo by ear, bUt Now i Use my haNds! hehe? eh... Not feeliN' this oNe. hehe,
🐾what did the barkbeast wear before goiN' to sleeP? why, he got comfy iN some 'Paw-jamas'! hehe,
🐾why did the barkbeast go to the baNk? to make a 'dePawsit'! hehe,
🐾Pfft, gotta go off 'N 'grUbsit' a good bUddy of miNe! goNNa be real delayed oN the joke side of thiNgs for the Next lil bit, #sUbstaNces <- coNtext/vagUe, bUt yoUrs trUly is sober x) hehe,
🐾lUsUs had to go 'N drag yoUrs trUly oUtta her 'cUPe by the scrUff! eaUh... hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/wtgtvtmP/totally-Not-flUshed.gif golly, i Need to get myself set right 'N stoP yaPPiN' my traP!! these jokes aiN't goNNa write 'N tell themselves if i'm bUsy barkiN' UP a storm with my PUsher waggiN' like a barkbeast's tail! hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/t2y518sr/hUNgry-barkbeast.gif i doN't eveN have a joke right Now, 'm jUst real hUNgry for grUbsaNga... hehe,
🐾i caN't keeP UP with toNight's crowd! i've already goNe 'N rUN oUtta #Nsfw material 'N bits for jokes at this hoUr! x( hehe,
🐾two gUys walk iNto a bar... the third gUy dUcks! ehehe, hehe,
🐾what's somethiN' Nice that y'all do for yoUr lUsUs? tryiN' to scroUNge UP some ideas to treat bwoofma to somethiNg Nice, hehe,
🐾what kiNda fish loves mUsic the most? why, it'd be a ''tUNe-a''! hehe,
🐾why was the barkbeast stealiN' shiNgles? it waNted to become a ''woofer''! hehe,
🐾#Nsfw | i Near scared the delivery troll toNight by comiN' to the door Naked! i doN’t kNow what scared 'em more, the fact that i was Naked, or that i kNew where they lived! ehehe, (this is a joke i'd Never do that, gosh!! x_x eveN i'm Not ProUd of this oNe...) hehe,
🐾ho boy, that's a lotta kUlt! (for me, at least...) wheN i'd startiNg kickiN' aboUt here with my silly lil' jokes i hadN't exPected so maNy folks to eNjoy what i do! ehehe. aNd almost 40 followers? that's more thaN my gig crowd! i gotta PlaN somethiNg good for 10k... bUt golly, i jUst dUNNo what! hehe,
🐾what’s the differeNce betweeN a bUsiNessmaN aNd a barkbeast? the bUsiNessmaN wears a sUit, bUt the barkbeast jUst 'PaNts'! hehe,
🐾what haPPeNed wheN the barkbeast weNt to the flea circUs? he 'stole the show'! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of lUsUs does a raiNbowdriNker have? why, they've got a 'blood'hoUNd! hehe,
🐾#Nsfw | what’s a Pirate’s favorite kiNk? PeggiNg! hehe,
🐾#Nsfw | startiN' to thiNk if i'm aroUsed by showers... they make me real 'wet'! hehe,
🐾why did the sNowmaN Name his barkbeast “frost”? becaUse he 'bites'! hehe,
🐾a three-legged barkbeast walks iNto a bar aNd says, "i’m lookiNg for the maN who shot my 'Paw'"! hehe,
🐾i haveN't had a PicNic iN for sweePs! last time i boUght my lUsUs, she tUrNed it iNto a ''bark-b-q!'' ehehe! hehe,
🐾what'cha call a barkbeast who's a magiciaN? why, ya call that a 'labracadabrador'! hehe,
🐾what does a barkbeast like to eat for breakfast? they like to eat 'woofles'! hehe,
🐾oNe bird caN't fiNish aN eNtire bowl of frUit looPs...bUt 'toU-caN'! ehehe, hehe,
🐾how caN flames afford to be so bright? 'fire works'! hehe,
🐾what do yoU call a jacket that goes UP iN flames? a 'blazer'! hehe,
🐾what's a rock's favorite frUit? why, that'd be a ''Pome-graNite''! ehehe! hehe,
🐾i like mUsical dramas... they really 'strike a chord' with me! ehehe, hehe,
🐾why is the barN so Noisy? 'caUse all the moobeasts have 'horNs'! ehe, hehe,
🐾why doN’t leoPards Play hide-aNd-seek? it's 'cUz they're always 'sPotted'! x) hehe,
🐾what kiNd of sNake woUld ya fiNd oN a scUttlebUggy? yoU'd fiNd a ''wiNdshield viPer''! x) hehe,
🐾a bUddy of miNe told me to PUt tomato saUce oN the shoPPiNg list, so i did... Now i caN’t read it! ehehe, x) hehe,
🐾#Nsfw for meNtioN || i hate wheN my hose stoPs sPrayiN' water... bUt theN i remember Not to 'kiNk shame'! hehe,
🐾woah, folks loved my silly lil' shirt! maybe i gotta show my collectioN i got stashed away! i got maNy of 'em with stUPid desigNs aNd fUNNy lil' sayiNgs oN 'em x) hehe,
🐾awwh thaNk yoU!! x) i got toNs more of 'em! hehe,
🐾what'cha call a well-behaved barkbeast that floats iN the Pool 'N is haviNg a graNd time? a ''good boUy''! hehe,
🐾y'kNow, i qUit my New job as a deliverytroll wheN they haNded me my first letter to deliver... i looked at it aNd thoUght, “this isN’t for me." ehehe, hehe! get it? sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾woah! ehehe, the folks ate that last oNe UP comPared to my UsUal material! hoPe i doN't Need to chaNge careers... ehehe, hehe,
🐾#Nsfw | what'cha call a book oN voyeUrism? a ''PeePiNg-tome''! hehe,
🐾my mailmaN has a really loNg Name... there's jUst so maNy ''letters''! ehehe, hehe,
🐾why caN’t milk cartoNs walk? 'caUse they ''lactose''! hehe,
🐾a PatieNt says, " i have PaiN iN my eye wheNever i driNk tea...” the medicUller rePlies, “take the sPooN oUt of yoUr mUg"! hehe,
🐾PeaNUt bUtter aNd baNaNa makes a faNtastic combiNatioN for sweet treats! x) hehe,
🐾they kNow better thaN to make that 'mis-steak! hehe x) hehe,
🐾why doN’t bUtchers ever argUe? 'caUse they always ''meat'' iN the middle! sNrrk, ehehe! hehe,
🐾a maN walks iNto a bakery, PoiNts to some bread aNd asks “is this glUteN free?” the cashier rePlies, “No, it costs $4.50"! ehehe, heh, hehe,
🐾a cabbage, a taP aNd a tomato had a race... the lettUce was ''a head'', the faUcet was still ''rUNNiNg'' aNd the tomato was tryiNg to ''ketchUP''! hehe,
🐾what’s the fastest liqUid oN alterNia? milk! it’s ''PasteUrised'' before ya caN eveN see it. bliNk aNd ya miss it! hehe,
🐾ooooh, woof! scrUmPtioUs! x) aNd goodlight to ya, rest easy! hehe,
🐾how did the walNUt kNow where the cashew was hidiNg? becaUse he was ''PecaN''! hehe,
🐾fellas i doN't thiNk i'm goNNa be makiN' it to the Next gig with all this cryPtic talk x( bUt a gal is goNNa keeP PUshiN', cUz this is her PassioN! #NotvagUe #somethiNgaboUtclUrch? hehe,
🐾what tyPe of markets do barkbeasts avoid? why, they go 'N avoid the ''flea markets''! hehe,
🐾coUld go for a tasty sNack 'boUt Now... caN't thiNk of aNy fUNNy material if my PaN doesN't have the eNergy. maybe i shoUld see if there's some good sPecials 'roUNd towN! hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/289P6krx/hUNdsi-lUsUs-selfie.jPg bwoofma waNted some of the sPotlight too! x) headiN' oN oUt sooN to see if i caN fiNd aNythiN' iNterestiN' oUt iN towN toNight, hehe,
🐾what did the barkbeast say wheN it accideNtally sat oN saNdPaPer? "rUff"! hehe,
🐾d'awwh, thaNk yoU, thaNk yoU! i'll be here all Night ' day x) hehe,
🐾what did the hoofbeast say wheN it fell? "i've falleN, aNd i caN't 'giddyUP'"! hehe,
🐾what is a PUrrbeast's favorite coloUr? "PUrrr-Ple"! hehe,
🐾why caN't a leoPard hide? 'caUse it's always ''sPotted''! hehe,
🐾what'cha call a fUNNy clUckbeast? a ''comedi-heN''! hehe,
🐾why did the crazy fella lose his job at the dairy factory? he was a daNger to himself aNd ''Udders''! hehe,
🐾if he caN't aPPreciate yoUr frUit jokes, yoU Need to let that ''maN-go''! ehehe, hehe,
🐾if a PUrrbeast loses its tail, where does it go? why, it goes to the ''retail'' store! sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾what kiNd of bird works at a coNstrUctioN site? the ''craNe''! hehe,
🐾what'cha call the hoofbeast that lives Next door? why, ya call that the ''Neigh-bor''! hehe,
🐾what haPPeNed wheN the lioN ate the comediaN? he felt ''fUNNy''! hehe,
🐾why was the broom late? 'cUz it ''over swePt''! hehe,
🐾did ya kNow that bats are always welcomed to joiN the circUs? i heard it's cUz they're good at ''acro'bat'ics!'', aiN't that ''faNg-tastic''? x) hehe,
🐾did'cha hear aboUt the soUP who woN the lottery? Now he's a ''boUilloN-aire''! hehe,
🐾what did the meloN say wheN his froNt yard looked too dry? "i gUess it’s time to 'watermalawN'"! sNrrrk, ehehe, hehe,
🐾did'ya hear aboUt the abaNdoNed 'N daNgeroUs gNome village, well, Now folks are calliN' it "g'No'me maN's laNd''! hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/9q5qyl5m/dog-coNfUsed-dog-gif.gif hehe,
🐾y'kNow, i oNce woN a PUmPkiN carviNg coNtest... it was a Pretty ''hollow'' victory! hehe,
🐾coUPle Nights ago i met a maN who said that alterNia was made UP of Pistachios, almoNds aNd cashews... bUt that’s jUst 'NUts'! ehehe! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of barkbeast loves to take bUbble baths? a ''shamPoodle''! hehe,
🐾did'ya hear 'boUt the sNail racer who ditched his shell? he thoUght it woUld make him faster, bUt it jUst made him look ''slUggish''! hehe,
🐾how do folks cook iN the jUNgle? why, they do it with a ''grilla''! hehe,
🐾what'cha get wheN yoU cross a sNake aNd a Pie? ''a Pie-thoN!'' hehe,
🐾good lord, it's all the same fella! x( #vagUePost hehe,
🐾what'cha call a bear with No ear? well, with a missiNg ear it'd jUst be a ''b''! hehe,
🐾why did the wizards show UP to their dUel emPty haNded? their weaPoNs were at a ''staff'' meetiNg! x) hehe,
🐾what lUscii are oN legal docUmeNts? why, that'd be the emPire-aPProved ''seals''! hehe,
🐾whooPs, didN't meaN to coNk oUt back iN my 'cUPe! where do barkbeasts Park their scUttleebUggies? they Park 'em iN the ''barkiNg'' lot! hehe,
🐾did'ya hear 'boUt the fella whose whole left side was cUt off? heard he's ''all right'' Now! hehe,
🐾what's a barkbeast's favoUrite mode of traNsPortatioN? ... ''a waggiN'''! x) ehehe, hehe,
🐾httPs://i.Postimg.cc/t2lvgjg6/hUNdsi-lUsUs-bwoofma.jPg my lUsUs x) !! she's the first oNe who sUPPorted my comediaN career! thaNk ya bwoofma ✨🐾 hehe,
🐾what soUNd does a robotic frog make? it goes ''rivet rivet''! hehe,
🐾if yoU're locked oUt of yoUr hive oNe Night, try slowly 'N carefUlly talkiN' with yoUr door... becaUse commUNicatioN is key! ehehe, hehe,
🐾why did the cookie cry? becaUse his gUardiaN was ''a-wafer'' so loNg! hehe,
🐾y'kNow, at my last show i got hit iN the head by a soda caN, bUt it didN't hUrt that mUch... it was a ''soft driNk''! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of mUsic do welders like? ''heavy metal''! hehe,
🐾i started a New bUsiNess makiNg yachts iN my attic this year... the ''sails'' are goiNg throUgh the roof! hehe,
🐾how maNy liPs does a flower have? ''tUliPs''! Pfft, hehe,
🐾what did the dorito farmer say to the other dorito farmer? ''cool raNch''! hehe,
🐾why did the mUshroom get iNvited to the Party? becaUse he was a ''fUNgi''! hehe,
🐾how did the octoPUs beat the shark iN a fight? becaUse it was well armed! sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾's a real PleasUre seeiN' a few folks iN ParticUlar always showiN' UP to sUPPort what i do! i Notice y'all! my PUsher goes oUt to 'em if y'all see this!! x] (aNd my oNe dedicated hater too) hehe,
🐾what do yoU call a belt made oUt of watches? a ''waist'' of time! hehe,
🐾why doN't eggs tell jokes? becaUse they woUld crack each other UP! ehehe! hehe,
🐾did'ya hear aboUt the New restaUraNts oN the mooNs? the food is faNtastic at both of 'em, bUt they both lack ''atmosPhere''! hehe,
🐾sNrrrk, aPPreciate the hoNesty there! jUst gotta chiN it. comes with Part of the gig, hehe,
🐾alrighty, Note to self... No clowN jokes, NothiN' 'boUt the mooNs aNd restaUraNts, aNd stick to shorter form jokes. yeeoUch! that last oNe missed the mark hard! there's always Next time at least, hehe,
🐾what do ghosts PUt oN their bagels? ''scream'' cheese! hehe! hehe,
🐾woah! talk aboUt a chaNge iN temPeratUre over here! i gotta PUll oUt some differeNt material for this hoUr if folks are riled UP 'boUt Now... x) #Nsfw (meNtioN by techNicality) hehe,
https://i.postimg.cc/Pqd0Zcff/Hundsi-NSFW-NOTcanon-fixed.jpg ((spins joyously as I toggle ooc for this purely bc Hundsi wouldn't actually hornypost ic BUT *I* will !! As me, myself, and I!)) ((NOT CANON sorry not sorry she doesn't do gigs like this, I just wanted an excuse to draw somethin' of her for once, snrrrk,, x])) #nsfw
🐾did yoU hear aboUt the sUbmariNe iNdUstry? it really took a ''dive''...! sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾how do locomotives kNow where they're goiN'? with lotsa' ''traiNiNg''! hehe,
🐾where do woolbeast go to get their hair cUt? the ''baa-baa'' shoP! hehe,
🐾i had a dream that i was a mUffler... i woke UP ''exhaUsted''! hehe,
🐾how does the mooN cUt his hair? ''ecliPse'' it! hehe,
🐾how do yoU fix a damaged jack-o-laNterN? yoU Use a ''PUmPkiN Patch''! hehe,
🐾ooh goodNess x) !! so mUch for cleariNg my PaN to focUs oN material 'N setUPs!! sorry folks, goNNa Need awhile loNger! heh, eheh... ✨🐾 hehe,
🐾why does (troll) waldo oNly wear striPes? becaUse he doesN't waNt to be ''sPotted''! hehe,
🐾which side of the clUckbeast has more feathers? the oUtside! hehe,
🐾why did the tree go to the deNtist? it Needed a ''root'' caNal! hehe,
🐾i coUldN't get a reservatioN at the library... they were fUlly ''booked''! hehe,
🐾what did the jaNitor say wheN he jUmPed oUt of the closet to scare the Newbie oN the job? ''sUPPlies''! hehe,
🐾yoU see, moUNtaiNs areN't jUst fUNNy... they are ''hill areas''! hehe,
🐾how does a PeNgUiN bUild it’s hive? ''igloos'' it together! hehe,
🐾what's the differeNce betweeN a seal aNd a sea lioN? aN ''ioN''! hehe,
🐾what's a hUsktoP's favorite sNack? ''microchiPs''! hehe,
🐾why did the clUckbeast get a PeNalty? for ''fowl'' Play! hehe,
🐾what do yoU do oN a remote islaNd? try aNd fiNd the tv islaNd it beloNgs to! sNrrrk, heh! hehe,
🐾what do yoU call a bee that caN't make UP its miNd? a ''maybe''! hehe,
🐾d'ya kNow where yoU caN get broth iN bUlk? the ''stock''! market hehe,
🐾how do yoU steal a coat? yoU ''jacket''! hehe,
🐾what is the hardest Part aboUt sky diviNg? the groUNd! hehe,
🐾why didN’t the oraNge wiN the race? it raN oUt of ''jUice''! hehe,
🐾waNt to hear a chimNey joke? got stacks of em! first oNe's oN the hive! sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾why do Pirates Not kNow the alPhabet? they always get stUck at "c"! hehe,
🐾what do yoU get if yoU cross a baNaNa aNd a comediaN? "Peel-good" jokes! hehe,
🐾where do jUveNile moobeasts eat? iN the ''calf-eteria''! hehe,
🐾how do lemoNs greet each other? with ''zest''! hehe,
🐾what do yoU give a sick lemoN? yoU gotta give it some... ''lemoNaid''! hehe,
🐾how did the barber wiN the race? he took a ''short cUt''! hehe,
🐾have yoU heard the rUmor goiNg aroUNd aboUt bUtter? NevermiNd, i shoUldN't ''sPread'' it... sNrrk, heh! hehe,
🐾what did oNe wall say to the other wall? i'll meet yoU at the corNer! sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾why did the develoPer break UP with their keyboard? it jUst wasN't their tyPe aNymore! sNrrrk, hehe,
🐾i jUst got fired from my job at the keyboard factory... they told me i wasN't PUttiNg iN eNoUgh ''shifts''! hehe,
🐾what did oNe Plate say to the other Plate? diNNer is oN me! hehe,
🐾why did the cookie cry? it was feeliN' a lil' ''crUmby''! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of tree fits iN yoUr haNd? a ''Palm'' tree! hehe,
🐾how do clUckbeasts stay fit? they always ''egg''cercise! hehe,
🐾what is the differeNce betweeN igNoraNce aNd aPathy? i doN't kNow aNd i doN't care! heh, eh, sNrrk, hehe,
:33< #girlbulge <3 :33< #girlbulge <3< :33< #girlbulge c3< :33< #gilrbulge <> :33< #nsfw <> <3< <3 c3<
🐾what do yoU call a loUd, big ol' Pile of PUrrbeasts? a ''meowNtaiN''! hehe,
🐾UP at at 'em! which meaNs more to hear from yoUrs trUly, ✨🐕 why did the troll rUN aroUNd their 'cUPe? becaUse they were tryiNg to catch UP oN sleeP! hehe,
🐾why do cholerbears have sUch hairy coats? ''fUr ProtectioN''! hehe,
🐾how do yoU make the NUmber oNe disaPPear? add the letter g aNd it’s “goNe”! hehe,
🐾how does a scieNtist fresheN their breath while oN the job? with ''exPeri-miNts''! hehe,
🐾what lies at the bottom of the oceaN aNd twitches? a NervoUs wreck! sNrrk, heh, hehe,
🐾what do yoU call a hUsktoP moUse that swears a lot? a ''cUrsor''! hehe,
🐾did yoU hear aboUt the bread factory bUrNiNg dowN? they say the bUsiNess is ''toast''! how ''crUmby'' is that? hehe,
🐾what did the dealer say to the deck of cards? i caN’t ''deal'' with yoU aNymore! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of diNosaUr loves to sleeP? a stega-sNore-Us! hehe,
🐾how does a traiN eat? it goes ''chew, chew''! hehe,
🐾why do crabs Never give to charity? becaUse they’re ''shellfish''! hehe,
🐾what haPPeNs to a frog's scUttlebUggy wheN it breaks dowN? it gets ''toad'' away! hehe,
🐾why did the girl smear PeaNUt bUtter oN the road? to go with the traffic ''jam''! hehe,
🐾what did the bUffalo lUsUs say to its charge wheN it droPPed him off at school? ''bisoN''! hehe,
🐾what did the barkbeast say to the two trees? ''bark bark''! hehe,
🐾is the Pool safe for diviNg? well, it ''deeP eNds''! hehe,
🐾what tyPe of mUsic do ballooNs hate? ''PoP'' mUsic! hehe,
🐾sNrrrk, yoU're telliNg me! jUst Never beeN my cUP of leafwater, y'kNow? all stUffy aNd high-strUNg... aNd they make stiff crowds! i'll stick to what i kNow ✨🐾 hehe,
🐾may Not be atteNdiNg the gala bUt that jUst meaNs more time to Post my qUiPs, bits, jokes aNd PUNs! hehe,
🐾why doN't Programmers like the great oUtdoors? too maNy ''bUgs''! hehe,
🐾why shoUldN't yoU tell a taloNscreecher yoUr secrets? they're always ''taloN'' everyoNe! hehe,
🐾if yoU boil a fUNNy boNe it becomes a ''laUghiNg stock''! hehe,
🐾here, i got oNe jUst for yoU!✨🐾 why did the coUrier have to qUit the baNd? becaUse they coUldN't ''carry'' a tUNe! hehe,
🐾what do yoU call a NervoUs exPlosive? a ''tickiNg time bomb''! hehe,
🐾my lUsUs is a geNiUs... i asked her what two miNUs two is, aNd she said NothiNg! heh, eh heh, hehe,
🐾what is a seal's favorite hobby? ''art art art art''! hehe,
🐾whatsaPP is here? heh, ''what's'aPPeNiNg'' here? hehe,
🐾what does a clock do wheN its hUNgry? it goes back ''foUr secoNds''! hehe,
🐾why did the Poor barkbeast chase its tail? it was tryiNg to make both eNds meet! hehe,
🐾what do yoU get wheN yoU cross a sNowmaN with a raiNbow driNker? frostbite! hehe,
🐾No, straNger, i will Not shUt UP :) what did oNe oceaN say to the other oceaN? NothiNg, they jUst ''waved!'' hehe,
🐾what boNe will a barkbeast Never eat? a ''tromboNe''! hehe,
🐾what kiNd of UNdergarmeNts do cloUds wear? ''thUNderware''! hehe,
🐾why do seagUlls fly over the sea? becaUse if they flew over the bay they woUld be ''bagels''! hehe,
🐾a werewolf walks iNto a bar. the barteNder says, “what’s it like beiNg a werewolf?” the werewolf says, “i haveN’t beeN oNe for very loNg, bUt i’m ''lycaN'' it so far.”! hehe,
🐾i’m glad i kNow sigN laNgUage, it’s Pretty ''haNdy''! hehe,
🐾broke aNd makiNg most oUt of what ive got. besides the New additioN of lettUce from aN aNoNymoUs soUrce, hehe,
🐾why caN’t bikes staNd UP UNsUPPorted? they’re ''two tired''! hehe,
🐾[i do Not coNdoNe the caPtUre or harm of lUscii aNd this does Not eNcoUrage it. Please be carefUl while haNdliNg them aNd always haNdle with care aNd resPect. 🐾✨] hehe,
🐾how do yoU catch a oNe-of-a-kiNd lUsUs? ''UNiqUe'' UP oN it! hehe,
🐾why was the scUttlebUggy always tired? it Never took aNy ''brakes''! hehe,
🐾why caN’t barkbeasts work the tv remote? becaUse they always hit the ''Paws'' bUttoN! hehe,
🐾what does my barkbeast lUsUs aNd my PalmhUsk have iN commoN? they both have ''collar'" i.d.! hehe,
🐾why did the Nihilist go to the sUPermarket? to get some ''No-PUrPose'' floUr! hehe,
🐾what were Prehistoric sleePovers called? ''diNo-sNores''! hehe,
🐾of coUrse! heh, always haPPy to leNd a helPiNg haNd or aN extra smile, esPecially after sUch a roUgh Night, hehe,
🐾why do ghosts love elevators? becaUse they ''lift their sPirits!'' hehe,
🐾i've always beeN very ''froNd'' of them, hehe,
🐾y'kNow, i was goiNg to grow some herbs... bUt i coUldN't fiNd the ''thyme''! hehe,
🐾what did the cholerbear say after he fell dowN the stairs? how ''em-bear-assiNg''! hehe,
🐾with the kiNd doNatioNs of bread aNd leftover tomatoes from the kiNd PeoPle (oNe siNgUlar PersoN) dUriNg my gigs, i caN Now make myself a tasty saNdwich! it's like a reward, hehe,
🐾what’s the best way to carve wood? whittle by whittle! hehe,
🐾🐾right. i shoUld Probably make a ProPer iNtrodUctioN oN here shoUldN't i? the Name's hUNdsi! broNzeblood, jUst gettiNg by oN comedy gig-work aNd other odd jobs. badPUN may as well have beeN my Name! there's jUst somethiNg aboUt trUly groaN-worthy, awfUl jokes that either maNage to crack a relUctaNt little griN or sweePs worth of grUmbliNg... after all, Never said i was good at beiNg fUNNy! aNd hey, if ya Need me? i got a faNcy ol' form here jUst for yoU folks! aNythiN' ya Need or waNNa be Nosey aboUt ehehe, httPs://forms.gle/z7tjsm3s728gqtjy9 httPs://i.Postimg.cc/52tryjqy/hUNdsi-sillai-ref.jPg hehe,
🐾aPPreciate the hoNesty at least, Never said i was a ProfessioNal! sometimes yoU Need a joke so bad it still maNages to get a scraP of amUsemeNt from folks. hehe,
🐾what do yoU call a lawyer who caN cook? a ''sUe'' chef! hehe,
🐾a cholerbear walks iNto a bar aNd says to the barteNder “i’ll have a rUm …………………. aNd coke.” the barteNder asks, “what’s with the big PaUse?” the cholerbear shrUgs. “i was borN with them.” hehe,
+WAOWEE !!! this is like !!! sensei level stuff !!! super duper smart thinkpan there from all ur TRAINING !!! [:O]+