♦ pitied by @gardenGuided
its nice to spend time with my family to get to have one sometimes i get so happy to be alive and so grateful its hard not to cry about it
bruh #currentsituation
failure at full view how can this happen to me crying, ‘i cant count’ .
well. nothin' else 6ut to sleep. used to like 6ein' 6y my lonesome, 6ut now it feels like torture. like now i know what i was missin' 6y havin' Company, not havin' it is just... yeah. uh. g'light.
After a hard day at work cyberstalking the profiles of my other selves, courtesy of my own self-sabotaging curiosity and deeply entrenched ennui, I've come to a decision. Our reputation is in the fucking bottom of the ocean, sat primly next to all the hellbeasts of the deep sea and wherever the shit Oda hid the One Piece at. So, it's time to work on that. Not for any of their sakes, obviously, but purely for my own conscious. Yeah, I have one of those. Try not to act too surprised. My bleeding heart can't take much more of it. Anyway, my first stop is apologizing to women. All women. Even you, the plausible woman reading this. Atonement for all the lesbian life hacks and that one Dirk who thought listening to music while feeling sorry for himself gave him an intrinsic understanding of women. Still kinda baffled at that one, honestly. Now here you go. An apology, a once in a life time spectacle, because any real Dirk would shit himself raw before ever asking for forgiveness. I'm sorry, women. And here; take this token of goodwill. My treat.
objectivvely quantifyin wwhat evven makes a day good in the first place is a neigh impossible task wwhat evven constitutes “good” such a useless wword utter filler nonsense for nonsense people wwith nothin to talk about besides complete fuckin gobbledygook my day wwas a day like any other wwith its ups and dowwns and all a-fuckin-rounds it wwas “good” just by nature a existin at all because a howw nebulous “good” evven means
Beam that makes you give me Kult.
WHATEVER, I GUESS I'M NOT DYING ANYMORE. I'M STILL ACHING LIKE A BITCH THOUGH.
⧃ Did that woman trim my beard in my sleep. I swear it's slightly less voluminous.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ It is a little funny to think that at one point in my life the thing I was most worried about was a woman in a velvet hoodie calling me what are, in the grand scheme of things, pretty minor insults. █ And now I'm out here. █ Aimless in space. █ Disconnected from everything. █ Eating a soldier who assaulted me. █ Hooray [SARCASM]. █ ... █ I want to go home.
𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… ▓▒░ 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐌 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ░▒▓ [NOTIFICATIONS:11] [MESSAGES:4] [CREW COUNT:11] [STATIC:6%] █ Looks like stopping when I hit 25% does help the recovery a lot. █ ... It never goes down to 0%, though. █ I guess its just going to be an issue forever. █ ... Or until I'm plugged into a ship that isn't fucking broken. █ We don't exactly have access to all the parts we need to fix it, after all.
𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… ▓▒░ 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐌 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ░▒▓ [NOTIFICATIONS: 5] [MESSAGES: 0] [CREW COUNT: 11] [STATIC: 3%] █ That's a lot of counters, huh █ One of these days my login messages will just be counters.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ Anyway I guess I get to be one of probably a smallish number of people who can say "Chittr is damaging my pan" and actually mean it for real, huh? █ I say, still online. █ I reckon it's just because I forgot to log off earlier when I was also doing some scans. █ Possibly won't happen again if I'm just careful about it. █ I am aware that that's wishful thinking but given that I don't have enough information about the exact cause of the damage, it's not a lie, at least. █ Explains a few things.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ ... Love to overhear conversations about me. █ They know I heard. █ ... Nice of the General Feargent to stick up for me, though. █ Still. █ Fuck. [RUNNING PROGRAM: FUCK THIS] 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈THIS_POST〉 [Clicking on this post plays the sound effect of a car crash followed by an audience laugh track]
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ Bored again now. █ Nobody ever tells you this, but drifting aimlessly in space slowly running low on food and having to be super conscious of water and desperately hoping the growroom can be expanded enough to feed everyone and having to eat the corpses of those who already died just so there's enough for everyone to stay healthy while we wait for the plants to grow and being worried that any minute someone will snap and decide to try and kill me and blow up the ship to end their suffering and take us all down with them again... █ Its boring. █ Its boooooring. [NOW PLAYING: WE LIKE TO PARTY (THE VENGABUS) - VENGABOYS] 𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓_𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄〈HELMSTECH〉"Still mad she gave you permissions back. Can you at least turn the fucking volume down?" [VOLUME:59] █ Fiiine. [VOLUME:30] 𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓_𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄〈HELMSTECH〉"...Yeah, I guess that's alright for now."
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… 𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ Totally forgot to log out while I was busy doing something else... █ No wonder that was a bit trickier than usual I was running additional processes. █ Ugh, my pan has been so much trickier to navigate lately. █ Some parts of my memory log are still corrupted, and there's a bit of static... █ I just kind of ignore it.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ You know, I was never all that athletic before being helmed. █ But not being able to have shore leave because I got universally shunted sure does make me feel like if I don't get to run and jump and play I'm going to lose my m𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 499 𝐂𝐂 〉 █ It's not a nice feeling.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈SER_DROSTE〉"Nonagn? Are you okay? You flinched and nothing touched you. Has something gone wrong in the ship?" 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈THIS_UNIT〉"No, sorry Ser. This unit was thinking unpleasant thoughts." 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈SER_DROSTE〉"Hm hm. You don't need to tell me what you were thinking, but if you'd like to, I'll listen." █ ... 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈THIS_UNIT〉"... I don't think I want to, sorry Ser." 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈SER_DROSTE〉"Understandable. Do you want to know what I do when I think something I hate?" 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈THIS_UNIT〉"You think things like this too? I'd like to hear it..." █ ... █ She smiled. █ I've never seen her smile before. █ Not with teeth. █ She looks built to break bones with those and that scares me. █ The mental image of𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 499 𝐂𝐂 〉 █ I don't want to think about it. 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈SER_DROSTE〉"I think of the angry thought as a shape, and I imagine it's giant, and its made of paper. And then I start ripping it up. Shredding it. Scrunching up the paper. Pouring water on it, setting it on fire, whatever feels satisfying... Yes, yes, works nearly every time." 𝐀𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎_𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓〈THIS_UNIT〉"Nearly?" █ ... █ She was silent for a while after that.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ You know, aside from people whose job is to read the manual, I don't think I've had anyone actually read my manual. █ Ser Droste has been reading it. █ Occasionally she asks me to clarify. █ Checks that something is applicable to me. █ ... █ I never expected this kind of treatment. █ If this is the reward for being assaulted by a soldier maybe I𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 154 𝐔𝐀 〉 𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 154 𝐔𝐀 〉 𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 154 𝐔𝐀 〉 █ Ugh I didn't mean to think that...𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 499 𝐂𝐂 〉 █ This was supposed to be a nice post.
MY CAPACITY FOR BEING SUCH A MASSIVE FUCKING CHUD ON OCCASION GENUINELY UPSETS ME. I DO NOT ACTUALLY HAVE TO BE LIKE THIS. WHY THE FUCK IS IT SECOND NATURE? DID THE POWERS THAT BE REALLY NOT CONSIDER THAT I COULD’VE JUST BEEN AN ASSHOLE AND MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, A LITTLE BIT COOL WHILE I WAS AT IT? A NONCHALANT ASSHOLE. SOMEONE WITH A LITTLE FUCKING SWAGGER. THAT COULD’VE BEEN ME. BUT NO. INSTEAD, I’M AN ASSHOLE *AND* A CHUD TO BOOT. GOD, I FUCKING SUCK. — KK
ABOUT AS WELL AS COULD BE EXPECTED, WHICH IS TO SAY, NOT PARTICULARLY WELL, CONSIDERING I HAVE NEVER ACTUALLY EXPECTED MUCH OF ANYTHING IN THAT REGARD. SO I DON’T THINK IT’LL BE TOO DIFFICULT TO IMAGINE JUST HOW WELL THAT WENT FOR ME. BUT I DIDN’T WAKE UP IN A COLD SWEAT OR FLAT-OUT PASS AWAY IN MY SLEEP, SO I’M COUNTING THAT AS A CAUTIOUS WIN FOR THE DAY. HOPE YOU’VE BEEN ALRIGHT, JADE. TRY NOT TO OVERDO IT ON THE SCALDING BEAN JUICE.
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ Whenever my Helmstech goes away I get uneasy. █ Its fine if someone else is also in the room. █ But I don't like being left alone with the soldier𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑〈 154 𝐔𝐀 〉 █ The untrained-temporary-caretaker. █ ... █ This unit does not want to be touched by him at all, thanks. █ He doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. █ Ugh... If only someone else had volunteered... █ Anyone else. █ I'd take that fucking asshole Barret over this. █ He wouldn't even want to do it but that means he'd avoid touching me as much as possible. █ Which would be great.
STOP INVITING PEOPLE TO OUR UNIVERSE. WE DON'T EVEN KNOW IF THAT'S SAFE TO DO. DID YOU EVEN CLEAR THAT WITH JADE??
and then? she stands on my bladder
sick an twisted my animal traps me with her tiny little body exclusively when i need to get up to use the bathroom
FIRST I GET FOLLOWED BY A HOMUNCULUS VERSION OF MYSELF, AND THEN I GET FOLLOWED BY SOMEONE (NOT NAMING NAMES) WHOSE LAST FEW POSTS WERE ABOUT GETTING HIS BULGE SUCKED. CHITTR IS A PLACE. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL MY JADE ABOUT MY EXPERIENCES HERE WHEN THEY'RE ALL LIKE THIS?
just say you want me dead jackie its faster
stop talking about me guys. i know you all want me but i can only handle one.
i am rubbing my temples and whisperingd softly but with great urgency not my john not my problem not my john not my problem not my john not my problem not my joh-
HEADSLAM GOD DAMMIT
i mustwve knocked a screwv loose last time i took a babe for a tumble im losing it #nsfwv
its ok to feel lonnely. evenn whenn suurrouunnded by people im right there with youu.
Going to seven eleven cause it'd be mad funny for s)(ore
D --> Nobody is equal. That is how it is, and that is how it shall be
I hold onto them until you are ready to remember. Their home is here in the pyrite.
glub?
would anyone want to watch a movie with me sometime?? i was thinking either all dogs go to heaven or maybe.... balto?
https://images2.imgbox.com/bf/e9/62sLleLlbR_o.png
maybe its just cause its late and im getting melancholic but damn every pride month just kinda makes me think about when i was a kid n i took a dull ass knife to my hair and just started trying to saw it off and bro found me being a total butt baby during it and he didnt say a word he grabbed some scissors from idek where and fixed the mess id made before spending a good while putting what was left of my hair in locs and like a lot of shitty stuff happened. no denying that i mean fuck i really dont think he felt anything for me and just kinda tolerated me for the most part but for just a day i kinda thought wed be okay and be a normal family and shit i dont know why i looked into it so hard its 3am i shouldnt be thinking about this crap [[ #vent ]]
i didnt realize robots could get headaches but here we are
You know, I was trying to wrap my brain around why my alternate found him attractive at all. Then I realized I'm a lesbian. Of course I couldn't see the appeal. So, I imagined him as a woman and it... made an uncomfortable amount of sense. Of course, a certain aspect of his horribleness is lost - while the abuse carries over, the misogyny does not, so that part I really can't fathom. This is not an invitation for him to comment.
cant eat cheesy garlic bread #traumatuesday