♦ pitied by @heartMarauder

bro my comment section and notifs is so fucking red rn im mobilizing the strider army or something oh and damara because shes a baddie
!remindYou the problem with being remind bot is that there is no one who truly hates it π,π; the only hates it can recall are from when it said it feels nice for it to get hates... #pitchyearning

ngl guys i think i put too much soju in my cup
YOU'RE TELLING ME I CAME HERE IN THE MIDST OF ONE OF THE MOST ROMANTICAL SORTS OF EVENTS EVER CONCEIVED, AND I DON'T YET HAVE AN EASY, IMMEDIATE WAY TO GET OVER THERE, NOR THE MEANS TO PUT TOGETHER A WORTHY LAST-MINUTE COSTUME, AND NO ONE EVEN TOLD ME UNTIL JUST NOW? I CANNOT FUCKING BELIEVE THIS. I TRUST NONE OF YOU. THIS IS SO FUCKED.

sighs and lays on my side i think im gonna be offline for the rest of the night im just not feeling up to posting or chatting much right now . take care everyone
a bit disaᰍᰍointed 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 my identity was announced 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 it was obvious i know 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 but i wood have liked 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 to generate some intrigue 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 before the mask came off 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 oh well 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 i guess thats how things go 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 maybe i should have looked into 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 what haᰍᰍens at a masquerade 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧

trying really hard not to be #pathetic or #sad but i wish they missed me. #vagueposting #no-one-here
:33 < W3lcom3 to n3p3ta shipping grid adv3ntur3!! *AC will b3 paying 3xtra att3ntion to th3 f33d board shipping chittr folks quad…* M3w must b3 car3ful!! Just lik3 Jak3y and dav3y!! @arous3dD3liv3ry

penis vanish? penis mysterious. penis crazy? penis delirious. penis long? penis continuous.

i have typed out like ten different chits and deleted all of them before sending be grateful chittr be very grateful
PICKING A FIGHT WITH JADE RIGHT WHEN SHE STARTS HER EVIL ARC. I'M FUCKED.
i guess the first question is, if sburb thinks you're alive. which is a terrible thing to think about.

honestly its probably a good thing jman isnt into masques cuz im pretty sure my outfit would have wigged him the fuck out #iwassexyasfuckthough #evenwithoutthestash

im only a little sorry

#mycaterpillar

see i got to the point eventually patience and screw you im goddamn hilarious you wish you could be on my wavelength a strider that doesnt get the strata of irony we should disown you

yeah but im at least funny on the way to making my point he just likes to hear himself talk

your bullshit unlocked the next level of irony extended sarcasm you were made by a dirk you should be used to lots of words for no reason

wow what a hard life you must have so sorry i doubted you cant believe i could pull such an offensive boneheaded move oh no my self esteem

oh yeah what is it

away on business my ass do you even have a job

weak

bro i just posted about its better competitor dr pepper im about those 23 flavors dude not watered down coke

what is today the whole of chittr finds out top secret strider classified info and i get sent $2k caegars for card packs to cheer me up what is my life right now
okay sorry for my outburst over t)(ere i’m not mad anymore

rEaL CuTe sEeIn mOtHeRfUcKeRs gEt bUlLiEd oVeR NaMeS. hUmAnS So dAmN InTeReStIn sOmEtImEs (O:

i swear this is bullying dude ill never forgive you for this

not right now i dont

Y0u cann0t eat a pastry 0utside these days (cause 0f the bees)

im gonna do the dougie on your grave

fuck yall im sending you all a virus to blast beastie boys through your speakers

whoops

dont be fooled by the way i seem to be right and awesome literally all the time im actually just objectively correct and possess godlike charisma thats all

stop pitying that i told you im objectively correct about everything all the time always

fuck i forgot #lyricposting too

remember? rememdnjer when do ya remmeber the time when we fell inlove gurllll

33> My St0mach Start3d Hurting Rr3ally Bad Aft3r Drinking Milk <33

if you break a pinkie promise youll- man i cant even tell you its bad bros its real bad

ayo i got 67 followers six seveeeeennn ... okay yeah just take me out the back and shoot me now i deserve that one
this world is fucked up n cruel where i cant even find my giant way 2 big bodypillow to sleep on. what am i supposed to do. sleep like a normie?? sleep like someone w/o maximum comfort?? i have it harder thn everyone else forever

im just saying if any of you have ever messaged me and i didnt get back to you for a few days its like a 99% probability that i just straight up did not see i had a message lol i got this bitch on silent 24/7 365 im out hear clearin all notif popups at once without checkin em cuz i hate seeing shit on my phone i live in blissful ignorance until someones like hey man i been trying to get ahold of you for weeks and im like huh what fr and the answer is always yeah they were

lmfao

sometimes i feel like im the only troll wwith a lick a sense on my entire goddamn planet its like evveryone else is operatin at a wwholly different emotional levvel from me like somehoww none a them greww as people since schoolfeedin and i aint evven think im the most rational troll sometimes it just comes dowwn to intent like im the only one wwhos actually concerned wwith lookin out for other people wwho aint myself and that is real loww for all a you lot cause i am really self absorbed

Alright here's a new segment for my usual rotation of chittr posts I call it strider hot takes and for my first ever hot take, I think some people form way to strong attachments to some people. #Strider-Hot-takes #Not-directed

nvm that, im good again #notevil

i don't think they gave me any anesthesia when they put that thing in #cw-surgery #cw-gore(?)
But when i say this its all No, Jake, hallucinating on snake venom isn't conducive to a good time for everyone involved.

okay so they took the tv, game consoles, coffee machine and record player bedroom untouched, all my collections are still here probably a two person job cant have been longer than ten minutes in and out

Q: "wwhat quadrants do u havve open wwink wwink wwink" A: ugh all a them i guess honestly im too busy for quads anywways id be neglectful at best

playing godzilla milf ass gay chicken with a living book and the book blinked first disrespectful as fuck

Q: "Howw are you goin boyfailure? Still drinkin?" A: har har no ivve been wworkin

Re^lly not ^ gre^t time to get these piercings m^n. At le^st | didn't decide to pierce my tongve too.
ii know how iit 2ounded.

God I just love it when they beg. #nsfw
when my 2creenreader 2tarted readiing 2hiit off ii diidn't remember beiing there yeah they managed two jump2care me.
ii forgot ii had badge2 and 2cared my2elf.

I Drove Without A Seatbelt. Which Is Particularly Irresponsible Of Me, Because I Drive So Terribly. #positive

Thi2 i2 actually driving m3 crazy.

How Tragic. #woe

Another rather boring day for me, I really need to find some ways to spice things up for myself.

yeah and its terrifying

i do.... u~u

okay so the current situation is there is a dave who may or may not be me stuck in a washing machine shut up not in a oh my god step bro way in a genuine i was proving to someone i could fit in one and now i fucked up getting in is one thing, getting out is a different beast

██████ Startup: Done. Dialogue. . Thought.TXT Initiation. . ███ █████ ██ System Compatible. . .Done. [LR] --> α𝚿e g❀⚓︎⚓︎e be sec⚙︎nd plαce surel𝚿 ████ ██ ████████ Complete. Send Chitt.TXT

Most of us never ask to get one at all, so I think you're in good comꫂ❁any :) ❣︎

It haꫂ❁ꫂ❁ens to all of us. Or...at least lots of us, haha ^^; I know it's hard. But it'll all be worth it when you find that ꫂ❁erson who makes you feel wanted and loved ❣︎

It gets easier. ❣︎

██████ Startup: Done. Dialogue. . Thought.TXT Initiation. . ███ █████ ██ System Compatible. . .Done. [LR] --> α𝚿e cen dreαଳ. ████ ██ ████████ Complete. Send Chitt.TXT

██████ Startup: Done. Dialogue. . Thought.TXT Initiation. . ███ █████ ██ System Compatible. . .Done. [LR] --> 𝚿eαh!! Pr☸bαbl𝚿! [LR] --> Br❀ w❀uld eα⚓︎ αn𝚿fin [LR] --> Ψe w⚙︎uld ⚓︎r𝚿 i⚓︎. D☸n'⚓︎ lie ████ ██ ████████ Complete. Send Chitt.TXT

██████ Startup: Done. Dialogue. . Thought.TXT Initiation. . ███ █████ ██ System Compatible. . .Done. [LR] --> i⚓︎ αin'⚓︎ h❀rrible [LR] --> 𝚿er αc⚓︎in' like αin'⚓︎ n❀b❀d𝚿 bu⚓︎ ଳe w❀uld eα⚓︎ i⚓︎ [LR] --> I⚓︎ be ██████' delici❀us ████ ██ ████████ Complete. Send Chitt.TXT

██████ Startup: Done. Dialogue. . Thought.TXT Initiation. . ███ █████ ██ System Compatible. . .Done. [LR] --> α𝚿e cαnnαe wαlk [LR] --> α𝚿e cαnnαe even ██████' sweαr [LR] --> bein α r⚙︎b⚙︎⚓︎ be ██████' ████. ████ ██ ████████ Complete. Send Chitt.TXT

had to take out my gauges because i slammed the side of my head on a bench and now it hurts like a bitch
thought i heard scratching on the walls thought it was rats lil buggers poking around for crumbs then i remembered space rats dont exist anyway if my wires get chewed on while i charge up know i died at the top of my game

laying down right in front of your view of the feed hey mind if i take a nap right here big dog

D --> Sometimes I regret leaving my following tab

| covld prob^bly restore my virginity if | st^rted pl^ying Weezer riffs.
exposed myself to yearning like some chump taking it back turns out some striders are built differently

Fumble. I’m a fake fan.

I've been stuck in the garage for days.

Uh Oh the Princess Twinks Didn't Like That One

anyway i gotta not be vaguing on my alts
Can you believe he drew me like this, what flavor of gay shit even is this?

you know i havent even heard from bro since he crashed at my place for a bit after he was released as complicated as our shit was i kinda do still hope hes okay and not on the streets somewhere hes probably fine im sure he will appear when i least expect it, thats kinda his thing

Nearly neglected my job of providing Chittr with #horse posting.

im going to crush you into a cube

pacing around idk. idk maybe he isnt that into me yo

(╥_╥) ZOMG why did no one tell me hotdog buns taste this good. Holy shit. Holy shit. It's real it's all real. ♫
can we fight as bros or are you gonna be weird about it #suggestive

you think im gonna mpreg this lil guy and husband him up or what the cards are so in my favor #SCORE

i forgot how could i forget the ancient art of credit card fraud

oh damn, i kinda feel like shit maybe i should play a game to occupy my time what game you ask? dead by fucking daylight surely that wont make things worse

i gotta stop promisin ppl imma do shit on a sundsy mornin, i didnt hav nearly enough sleep 😩

yeah you can have depression but when you show symptoms of depression thats like... gross, and you should just fix that

Ugh. I can’t align this pin for shit today. Yeah, let’s give the guy who relies on the dexterity of his hands tremors in them. Great idea.
dude that’s not committing to a bit you just like meowing

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, ma𝚿be i⚓︎ be a bi⚓︎ la⚓︎e ⚓︎eh sa𝚿 a𝚿e be afraid ☸' d𝚿in'. If i⚓︎ all be g❀in' wr❀ng, a𝚿e dunn⚙︎ where a𝚿e'll end uଳ. If s❀mefin g☸es wr☸ng a𝚿e kn☸w a⚓︎ leas⚓︎ ଳh☸zz𝚿'll bea⚓︎ ⚓︎eh h☸⚙︎fbeas⚓︎ gu𝚿 ⚓︎eh dea⚓︎h. ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:・.☠
there's completely untouched birthday cake flavored limited edition cheerios somewhere around here because nobody wanted to try it. i dont want to try it. birthday cake flavors of things usually suck massive dick. i wonder if its stale already. i dont even remember getting it.

Do yov think someone h^s ever covghed into their pitch's movth on pvrpose ^fter shotgvnning? Sc^ry. #svggestive | think.
need one of those hand pointer stick thingies so i can aggressively point at things silently with it. theyre really effective at sending a message.

my daughtr is such a dear, she checks on me when i get hungover and helps me out lmao #substance
revising some thoughts self love isnt just one handed love on your meat you sick fucks what if i meant one handed for my soul one hand in the boxers of self-confidence fisting the trousers of pure swagger yeah #suggestive

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ WELL given the horny posting on this site at least 85% of the user base is a submissive bottom (boring). are you not a bottom? do you not want to be spanked and your wires played with? wait, wait you said the strider homophobic men don't take it was your fave conversation. we can have that kitty cat ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ you shy now? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

i think i just wish i meant as much to people as "real" (sorry jane i know youd be so annoyed by me phrasing it like this) dave or maybe im spiraling tonight idk putting myself to bed like im a misbehaving toddler who needs a nap
Was thdt supposed to be some kinda threat??? That’s aforable

Good. Big fan of this one.

i feel like this is a barely concealed threat to my general existence but im consciously choosing to put that on the back burner for the sake of rectangular pieces of cardstock

we dont gotta talk about it we can just let it sit there and simmer slowly like perpetual stew at least not publicly man lemme keep one shred of dignity in this comment thread

hey look over there its someones color coordinated cable organization

Really need to get my head out of the gutter.

You should start tagging me when you post about me so I can keep better tally of how often you're stuck thinking about me, by the way.

I am so very grouchy right now. Right this second. Each tick of the clock I become increasingly grouchy.

Because it's me in this situation.

i literally joined this year

there’s too much red on my dash.

Go on, then.

Felt like rubbing it in?

Ugh. I was being pathetic last night.

Pr^cticing this e^rly shovld be illeg^l or something. They won't let me go b^ck to the sl^b. Ughhhh.
Outrageously done with the nutrition shakes they give me. Everytime I had to force it down it's like I'm transported back to eating putrid gore. I wish I could claw out my tongue and tie off my esophagus. Everyone's focus is on my health though, so that's why I'm putting up with it. It's hard to do and I'm overstimulated. #gore #cannibalism #tw-eatingdisorder


Yoink.

xx_chchow_forgor_2_sleepe._GOODLIGHTA_xx

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ public platform and i follow you. you aren't safe. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

L4UNDRY SUCKS B3C4US3 YOU DO L4UNDRY TH3N YOU PUT L4UNDRY OUT TO DRY TH3N YOU PUT L4UNDRY 4W4Y 4ND TH3N TH3 CYCL3 ST4RTS 4G41N.

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ STEALING MY EMOJIS ૮( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ა ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹
#Substances made me cough so hard I saw black dots.

yeah man pass the dave down we like a birthday party up in here and yeah ive been like so upfront about being a penniless beggar for a while man

Want all the attention for yourself?

u guys are fumbling the bag. imagine having an expert at relationships at ur fingertips and ur asking me about BACON. scoffing at u!!

Sigh. He needs to come back online so I can bother him. #vagueposting #notreally

Ye^h on second thovght | don't think yov covld h^ndle it h^h^.

🫵 👎

Hal Strider. i’m going to beat. your. ass.

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ i see what you pressed, you like the idea too smh. brats LOVE being corrected. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ "i'm sorry for being so difficult buni, pls spank me." you could start there? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

i just had a total mood drop. i'm totes annoyed at the world. do not pity this btw, my spear is sharp P:<

Kink: stabbing. blood and possible fatality to make it authentic Rating: Eh. Snuff isn’t my style, believe it or not. I've also been stabbed enough for a lifetime. The blood aspect is hot. 2/10. Want yours rated next? Hit me up.

i’m gonna get into my pjs and kiss someone.

sometimes i think im 2 flirty 4 my age but then i remember half the people ive talked with on here want me

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ we'll never know now will we ૮( •̀ ᴖ •́ )ა ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ i'm so normal and well adjusted. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ i was going to say something nice but FUCK YOU @heartMarauder fucking out here setting up trap cards. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

Would people believe me if I said that last one wasn't actually about any version of Jake? Probably not, but the very detailed agreement we have about avoiding physical contact means I don't need to be believed to be right. Also our Jake doesn't smoke, so
i hate when people say "i wish i had a tail to wag so people know im happy" it doesn't work like that you master the art of secrecy the same way you hold back tears in the break room and honestly it's really insulting to suggest that it's automatic and can't be contrOh fuck not again

need a sugar daddy to buy as many pokemon card packs and boxes as i want and the sugar part is just him watching me open them and going "oh shit this one is fire" whenever its a full art

I got about half of what I set out to do done in 7 hours. Rough. Soon, though.

85th post complaining about my back pain while my posture remains abysmal.

S^me with p^st^ c^n yov believe this shit.

They're lying to yov when they s^y the bre^dsticks ^re endless by the w^y they will kick yov ovt.

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ yeah i doubt it, i've seen you plenty. i see your smug face right now! also weren't you going to be posting hole? what happened to that?? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ entering a kismesissitude with a splinter of myself like a real dirk splinter ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ if anything, i'm the only person allowed to say it to you ₊ ⊹₍ᐢᐢ₎ ᰔᩚ ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ making me wait is the most dirk thing you could have done you fucking BRAT ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

We get booked pretty often bvt th^t's bec^vse we're like not picky ^t ^ll h^h^. When we s^y we'll pl^y ^nywhere we re^lly me^n it. Also like ^s long ^s yov h^ve food money is wh^tever.

perfect time for a whiskey n coke

Left yourself wide open for that, sorry.

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ no you'd enjoy it, giving you the IDEA of me kicking your ass so you can cuck yourself to the idea. WELL it's been 30 minutes again, i'm all ears. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ we are not about to have the strider homophobic taking it isn't manly talk. i wanna know about who dave was pathetic posting about. giving me this run around and it better not be another damn karkat! name your price haly-boy ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ yes but that has nothing to do with the cuddling, everyone should enjoy laying in bed, it's fucking awesome. i also don't have a in-n-out unless i want to and most of the time i don't so it wasn't going to get sexual. can two super intelligences not lay in bed and watch bob ross together? 1984 ૮(≖_≖ )ა ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ what you want? also weren't we planning on cuddling?? i didn't fucking charge you for that????? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ no i think that's just dirk. that boy ain't right. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ almost half an hour ago, yeah. but i reply to things up to an hour old. no shame gang ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ lame, wanted to see you are whiney for attention or something ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ no no, said I like sucking on seed, the least I can do. that's all anyone ever does to that gay boy ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ " yeah i bet you love sucking on seeds. " ... man mangos get me moaning too ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

Debating. Alternatively, taking a page out of Roxy’s wizard media and pondering.

He’s back to hating the #horse pictures. Right when I thought I was making progress.

Eager for attention or praise this time?
———My lΨnƐ attƐmpt Ψs just kknƐƐlΨng and goΨngn PLƐASƐPLƐASƐPLƐASƐPLƐASƐPLƐASƐP0LƐASƐPLƐAS——Ɛ
oh fuck really is it that noticeable how long have i been prowling around with that shit broadcast for all the world to see

why do my horny posts get pity. can’t a girl crave some bulge once in a while. >:( #suggestive

it’s probably soooo freakish of me. i’ve just literally never wanted to be dyed violet from the waist down so badly b4. she’s compromised my dignity with her sorceress prowess and i’m, like, so pathetic in her wake. #nsfw #suggestive

she just has these hot ass shark teeth that i NEED in my shoulders and chichis. #suggestive #yearning

Guys I'M the guy that needs to get his mood stabilizers upped. It is morally correct to say this to me.

My Tummy Has Hurt All Night And I'm Being So So So So So Brave About It And I Only Cried Once

new in stock at the lohac magic shop: elixirs! get taller get stronger get faster get more charming get more flying and more! this chitt sponsored by the lohac magic shop located south of new strider town
D --> :( I get that they are sometimes peculiar but really, hideous, disgusting, stupid?

man i should go dancing more often actually

sometimes i think about pitying a post i really shouldnt somebody could be inches from the edge and that could be what sets them on a fucking banshee screeching rampage that sets the skies aflame and then i remember thatd be fucking hilarious and pity anyway

Throw back to that time we were playing Among Us and I was getting heated about the last ghost that didn't finish their task. The call was coming from inside the spectral house 😭

You may now pilfer my belongings and parts. For I have died.

I’ll throw you a churu.

I am tempted to stay in bed today. Project be damned.
I haven't been poked and prodded this much since. #suggestive

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ yes, but also a threat! ૮(¬`‸´¬) ྀིა ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

maybe i just need to go be a party boy or someshit

Ah, yes. Because a random dizzy spell would make this fucking asinine day better.

well thats a little extreme i didnt even do anything to you
I, too, bait the internet for attention and then become disgruntled when I receive everything I ask for. These deplorable whores. I suck my front teeth hard as fuck to make a noise of displeasure, and continue seething in my self-created box of first world problems.
feeling the need to get knocked up this is weird #nsfw

i bought too much groceries this is not a problem i thought could exist for me but i forgot i only have one cupboard and a mini fridge rn gonna be goin to sleep hugging a loaf of bread like a teddy bear
still wonderin y janey took issue w/ my james rolfe postin

typo -1hp
I wish I had someone to hold me, to comfort me and be with me, I really wish I wasn’t lonely or depressed, both at the same time honestly.
🗡 Y✶u really wracꓘed y✶ur screws f✶r that ✶neehehehehehe.
🗡 ꓘeep eXisting, f✶r ✶ur, my, ehehehehehentertainment.
🗡 Ehehehehe, c✶ding, belief, such interesting c✶ncepts y✶u have t✶ w✶rꓘ with. We speaꓘ in certainties. I, We, ꓘn✶w all. Th✶ugh, watching the lessers scrambleehehehehehe and cling t✶ such juvenile things t✶ validate their eXistence is s✶ veryhehehehee entertaining f✶r us. Mechanical, ✶r n✶t.

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, s⚓︎⚙︎ଳ bein' all weird 𝚿e fuck ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:・.☠

I know.
🗡 Y✶u areehehehehehe, b✶th such simple creatures, ehehehehe, pr✶grammed mechanically and bi✶l✶gically t✶ be s✶, ehehhehehe, temp✶rary.
🗡 ehhehehehehe, hard indeed, feeble and pathetic, but y✶u areehehehehehee, n✶t s✶ different.

im learning that i would willingly put myself in a time loop for the sake of my friends see you on the other side :/
Bro. do not hate me for this but.... I don't like subway... yeah.... sorry... It's just... it's a no for me... don't jump me bro. https://forms.gle/ve3fzErwrT672CCX9

THEY JUMPING ME https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/2aaee2f1c879.png

Glad to see half of us are being degenerates right now.

That's great, really. Funny as hell.

Apparently I missed a fucking chapter when did Dave get a kid.
ᐖ GUH......IM RLY TIREᐖ ᐛ

It’s been peaceful a while. I can’t help waiting for the other shoe to drop. Seems like it always happens in the post-game timelines. Here’s to hoping I don’t end up like one of those ult douches.
mi9ht eat theo. nom nom.

i forgot to change my red back to the regular red so im just dr pepper red forever now

hiding out in a bright green suit im a fuckin genius

damn now thats a thing to wake a guy up...

Actually, for all the Rolals out there, Lykoi.

Adore me as II adore you... ✨️🌹
𓆩𓆩 im such a good bro for rechi✟✟ing ✟ha✟ despi✟e ✟he fac✟ ✟ha✟ wolfgang is ge✟✟ing flir✟ed wi✟h crazys✟yle on ✟ha✟ pos✟ 𓆪𓆪

Not a pony fan, Hal?

It appear someone's in love with me, I haven't done anything. ^,,^

what can i say im dressed to impress and these shorts ate
Do people even do speed dating anymore? Me and you lets go now.

It's so easy two get dirty when you can afford it. It's so easy two be thoughtless when you don't need two think. It's so easy two be messy when it doesn't matter. When it doesn't threaten you. When it's not dangerous otherwise. When you can chalk it up two being quirky and whimsical. Not everyone has that privilege. Not everyone can get away with being filthy and come out without a scratch. So if you ask me why II don't want two get dirty, keep it in mind. II wasn't given the grace two be.
I’m 100% sure you can’t do that, that’s just not possible.
Did you just take the privilege of me being able to yearn away? Hell you mean ‘I don’t think so’
ᐖ ER. YUH. EZAᑈTLY. ᐛ
ᐖ MAYBE I SHULᐖ JUS GO OUT AN HOOK UP WIF ᐖA FIRST TROLL ᐖAT APPROAᑈHES ME FIRST LAWLLLL #NSFW ᐛ
ᐖ SUMTIMES I FINK IM BAᐖ AT MAKING MYSELF WANTABLE ᐛ

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, well 𝚿eahhhh, bu⚓︎ a𝚿e wan⚓︎ 𝚿er juic𝚿 de⚓︎ails. . . ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:・.☠

aint drunk anymore, so ig i gotta stop runnin from my feelins now
When you laugh the period out of you, IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY. IT'S JUST WEIRD.

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, a𝚿e be curi❀us. ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:・.☠
( ◞‸◟ ) to be without sleep...the very thought is ✦lmost too cruel to be✦r ⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
The longer I exist the more… I don’t know, complex things get? I obviously want him to get better but I think I’d miss them. Jake and Tavvy. Maybe I’m becoming self aware. Ooh. Scary. Nah. I think his worries are affecting me.

shits got me feelin all weird all of a sudden and i dont rly know why its all pretty dumb, ngl #vagueposting
One of my favorite activities is playing the "how disgusting am I" game. Profoundly easy to play. DM someone you care about and watch the relationship dissolve with every message. By the end of it, you get your answer.

ok real talk though cause its about that time of day where i start getting introspective it really is a special kind of fucked for all my friends to be mine but for me to not be their dave, it ruined what i had with karkat cause im not the one hes in love with even though from my perspective i am its all just fuckin messy man

he existed i just never got to meet him

doc scratch simps for worst pony fork found in kitchen

yknow thinking about it it kinda sucks i dont have a hal in my timeline because we could relate to each other pretty deeply like we could have the brotherhood of all times might even call him twin

If youve ever been victim to my FATHEADED sense of easily retractable comradery kindly raise your hand so i can divvy up a payout of some consolation moolah! Clearly those who share my likeness are little more than UNDERHANDED BLUNDERBABES looking to get up to no good so im sorry if youve ever dealt with a not-me me and his twerp ass attitude! #directpost #BIGGERfuckyou

forgot to get much else tbh thought i had some more shit in the fridge but it got raided by john

im so hungry but all i got rn is some bell peppers and a lemon
My bad traits is that I’m a strider… Scary.
My condolensces for anybody whos ever had to deal with my particular ilk considering what bogarting buck-toothed cockeyed horseshitty DOOFUSES we seem to be. Moving forward my netherdumplings will no longer be on loan to anyone but my own two paws!!!! #bigolefuckyou #directpost #suggestive

Anyway, since I’m still feeling like whining without being side eyed by my Roxy, I highly doubt he still has any feelings at all. Frankly, I think he just can’t fathom himself being alone after all this time.

It’d be jarring if you were.

Pro tip: situationships suck.
Just a general psa for common courtesy purposes. If a door is unlatched and you happen to wander in on someone mid me-time then proper etiquette dictates that you back on out quiet as a church mouse and lock the door behind you on your way. NOT stand there nattering over his woody harrelson. #suggestive

isnt it fucking cray cray that i can tell someone i have depression and theyre like what no way youre always so chill and cool and swag and im like yeah thats the point anyway today is just one of those days when you dont wanna wake up everythings fucked, everybody sucks you dont really know why but you wanna justify rippin someones head off
Funny. He was just saying the same about you.
All I did was go up and down the stairs. I'M SWEATING BY DOING NORMAL ASS EXERCISE??

the sexual tension betvween me and the sexual tension betvween us. #suggestivwe

aint that what they all say shits cool i grew up eating out of my closet i can do it again

does he dress like that and whats with breaking out the full name youre creepin me out what are you my mom
« li₭e fuc₭ dude imagine y●u f●und ●ut after the fact that y●u'd accidentally put ᶴ●me●ne y●u care ab●ut directly in harmᶴ way becauᶴe y●u weren't t●ld the full ᶴc●pe ●f ᶴhit. it'ᶴ all g●●d and well t● g● "●h well he ᶴh●uld have ₭n●wn" but man it ain't that ᶴimple? ᶴ●metimeᶴ y●u miᶴᶴ ᶴhit. ᶴ●metimeᶴ y●u d●n't ᶴee the c●ntext and y●u d●n't get the full ᶴt●ry and y●u're d●ing the beᶴt y●u can with what y●u have, and ᶴ●me●ne ᶴtill getᶴ hurt. fuc₭ all ●f y'all. ●bligat●ry n●t ₭ager● »

i need someone to yearn for me the way kankri yearns for latula maybe then i’d move the fuck on lmao

There's a Strider on my chaise lounge. Why is there a Strider on my chaise lounge? More importantly. /Which/ Strider is on my chaise lounge?
ALRIGHT SO PRETENDING THAT SHIT I SAID LAST NIGHT DIDN'T HAPPEN

maybe for the other wwhinier eridans im the only one a us that actually has their shit together im basically the best one

help me wwin an argument havve you evver used the phrase "hair a the barkbeast" or "the hair a the barkbeast that bit you" or any a its other vvariations

fuck off im literally makin plans right noww wwith someone infinitely better than you

i slept hard as fuck and dont evven feel rested about it and my hangovver is awwful i am NOT goin into wwork today

me next
happy bisexual visibility month ya filthy animals
I have a dirty mind but not in a libidinous way. No no theres actual bugs and rocks and cobwebs in there. Mold too.

this morning is harder than they've been lately why did he do this to me
ALL MY FRIENDS ARE HOT, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW THE FUCK I'M SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL ABOUT IT.

you want some fries with your weaksauce

why did he say all that shit and then block me you're the reason i did this dude i'm so tired of you playing with me i genuinely think you enjoy hurting me at this point stay safe asshole

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ nah, we totally had chemistry man, felt it down in my heels. let it happen, let me pull you. ૮( ¬ᴗ´¬ )ა ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ i kinda got crazy pull not gonna lie. magnetic even. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ not what i expected playing into the bit ... hmm ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

got yelled at for trying to cop a feel earlier, its hovw i stim can people not be ableist. #suggestiwve #ableism
You may think twice before you eat but i eat twice before i think. Frankly my fellow chitterians weare *not* the same.

its so hard when youre so sexy hot none of you understand

im feelin rly self conscious abt my thirst trap posts all of a sudden #vagueposting
I have kicked far less buckets than usual, as of the times!! Which, for the scientifically inclined of us, means I have been slacking, but I suppose some may say it is terrifical in another way.
Precisely the same amount of time its taken me to come up with THIS 🖕🏽

I'm alive. It's been nearly a week but I'm alive.

can someone tell me why half of the people i dated didn't wanna go public about it?
SUBJECT: LOSING IT. GOING CRAZY. PERHAPS, EVEN, TWEAKING.

AT LEAST YOU CAN ADMIT IT STRAIGHT UP.
The human spirit was simply not built to withstand this many blasted passwords. Eight characters one symbol a number a capital letter and apparently the tears of a grown man. My lifes work hinging on remembering if its a frigging exclamation point or a hashtag!!!
It was a metaphor and i know *YOU* know you mix-and-match mr. potato head cheat.
Damn this city's breakfast options are ass

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, a𝚿e. ⚓︎ha⚓︎ be wha⚓︎ a𝚿e be imଳl𝚿in, landlubber. ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:・.☠

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, a𝚿e dunn❀, Hal Mahmai g☸⚓︎ a real g☸⚙︎d ring ⚓︎❀ i⚓︎, hehehh. ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:・.☠
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