Discord
@pickledLemons
why in all my years id never
i haVE JusT cOME bACk fROm a prolONGeD sABbaTICAl i woUld ask "WHaT have i miSsED" bUt ID RaThEr fOcUS On wHat I haVe gaiNED WhiCh IS a LIteRAl WHEEL of FOrtUNe TwO SliCes oF iNfIniTE pizza anD a tRaMP sTamp On My lEfT hIp Made FRom tHe INKY DarKness BEtWeEn STARs hOrroR tErrORS KNow hOW TO PartY.
I fEEl VIOLATeD FOR SCORInG sO hIGH oN tHat OVERbeaRIng cUEBaLlS StUPID LIST HavE i GOnE SANE! ARe mY aNTIcS NOt ZAnY eNOUGh AnYMoRE; HAS OPENING Up tHe skY SO THAT THe GREAT flyING spAghETTi MONSTER miGRATION CAN OCcuR bECOMe A bIT TOO BorIng fOR THE AvERaGE MoRTaL TO EXpERiEnCE. MAYBE I SHOuLD GO ON A SPIRITUaL JOURNEy Of sOmE KInD oR STARt TAKINg HARD DRuGS OH BuT i DO HAte THE WAy ROCkS GeT STUcK IN My vEINS:;.
UGh i haVE juST hAD tHE mOST uncOMFortABLE FeElInG ruN tHrouGH My bODY I WONder wHy tHat Is cOuLD it be relAted To The alLURiNG rEd NOTIfIcATIOn oN mY screEn OH SWEET CELESTIA- HTTpS;//cdN.ImGChESt,Com/FileS/76cBA022D65F;PNG
tHEre has BEEN a DiscONcertINg LaCK OF me on tHe dASHboarD you CAn tHAnk mYSelF for SOLViNg ThAt ISSUE:
i mistakenly rwechitted this so i must state this was a mistake and i do not want to see morwe of you please do not take that as an endorwsement i am heavily against this
thank YOu FoR yOUR kiNd recHITt i wILL mAKe sUrE TO BE EXTRA proliFic WITH my posTIngs WHeN i noTiCE yoUr prEsEnce ON thE LINE
fOr THe RECorD i DO NoT abUse fluTTErYSHY iN AnY wAY shaPE Or foRM I mEAn RealLy EVERyTIme I MAke aNy poST sOmeone jUMPs ONtO the "OH PLeASE spArE FLUtterSHY yOU HAnDSOmE DeviL" i am ReforMeD r E F r O M m d P ReFOrmeD! YOU DONT havE To worRY aBout anY AbUse NONE IS PreSENT AnD eVen thE THoUgHT mAKes mY sTomaCH LIteralLy Do flIps A PrOCeSs wHIch dESPITE The AbstrAct StaTe oF my BIoLoGy Is QuITe UnPlEasaNt i asSUre yOU!
Oh MY It AppEars AN INfesTaTIOn of ultImATE DIRks haS tAkeN pLACE AND IM AlL out Of THiNly VeiLed sElF-conTEMpt repellENt i DoNT SUppOsE tHe Local TRolL 7/11 STOCks thAt?
iT COmES iN pilL forM YoU KNow PERSonaLly I DonT NeED aNy SincE i HAVe my FRIEndS bUT YOU SHOUld looK INtO A DOcTor OR PSYchOlOgisT tO gIvE sOmE I WOuld prESCribe iT But thE aFOrEMENTIoNed fRIENds ReVokEd MY HAndiNG oUT emotIonal CUREs IN pill foRM DEGree AND i DOnT wAnt to gO ThroUGh ColLEGE aLL oVER again Just tO GeT ANOtHer.
i aM plENtY kinD To FLUttERsHY whY DOES eVEryOne AsSuMe IM NOt HOw waS i suPposed tO KNoW shEd HAVE sUCh aN AdVERSe. IF SoMEwhAT entERTaINiNG. REaCTIon to LiQuId cOURage anD nOT ONly dID i APOLOGIzE but IRon WILL is StilL TrYING To SUe mE for tHreaTeniNg HiS bUsIneSs;
IM gOIng tO gO HavE a MoSt WONdeRFUl Tea pARTY WITH SoME HoRrOr TErRorS aNd I FIGuRED i MigHT usE iT aS A LeaRNIng oppORtunITY tO SCoRe SoME brOWnie poINTs With tHe ROYaL HOO HaH by PRoViDInG a usefUl TiP So AnYWaYS. AlWAyS rEMeMBer to sTAy SaFE AnD briNg a paIr Of ruBy rEd slIppERS jUST iN Case You NeeD To cOME HoME IN A Hurry whILE TRAVersINg DimeNSIONAL BouNDaRIES THiS Goes FOr Any vACAtiON but eSpecially tHE eXTRa plaNaR oNEs:
☼ Oh dear. I had a feeling you'd find this place eventually... ☼
celESTIa! IsnT it Great iM fInALLy gEttINg ArOuND to MeETinG SOmE beIngs AROUNd MY Weight clAsS: NOt tHAT you dIDNT dO YouR beSt TO Get tO It WItH all THOSe cAkEs YoUVE HAd bUt In SomE CAseS nATuRAL tAlENt juST cannoT Be bEAT SadLy foR YOU
I dIDNt SAY oTHeRwIsE diD i; Your WeIgHT is PerfEcT fOr YouR sOMEwHaT iMmorTal BUT ULtiMaTEly confineD EXiSTeNcE. VERY PrOPoRTionAL!
currEntlY StitchinG emBarRAssMENt dRAPEs DM Me IF youD lIKE CurtaINS ThAT pRoJect YoUr MosT shaMeFUl tHOuGHtS on tHEmSelVes And I miGht SEnd a CoUple oF oVer.
GOoD DAwn EVERYoNe I Just finIsHed mAking mILK sCulptuREs OF a CertAin WEll REnoWnED coW ON ThiS pLATFORM i dO HOpe ShE APpReCiAtEs The gesture nOW haVE i missED ANytHinG eXCItiNg. DO Tell Do TelL
yEs yeS And SleepIng in The mIddLE Of a SummER afTErNoon iVE HEARD ThaT SonG EVErY VERSioN oF ME woRth mENTiONINg has hEaRD THAT sOnG And FRaNKLY HOw IS IT MY fAuLT tHAt YOure nOt LiSTENiNG tO YOur sleEP sCheDuLE! cIrcaDIAn clOcKs are a THINg peOPle ItS NoT mY FAult tHat yOU nEEd To rELy ON The ArBitRaRY paSSAGE OF A CELEsTial OBjEcTs To MAInTAiN yoUrs!
afTER SOme loNg CaReFul CONSIdERAtION tHAt tOOK AbOUt a MiNUTe I haVE dEcideD tO cREATE A queStIONS BOX foR All tHE TRoLLs; HUmAnS. PoNies AND ENtitieS of moRE SupERnAtUraL PErSUASiON to DROp tHEir EndlESS eNqUirieS About mOi iNTO: HTTpS://fOrmS;gle/ZEHkVnmXx4DFmBDS7 PS; if yourE WONderiNg WHY THE FORm is So well wriTTen COmPAReD tO MY uSUAl POsTs 1) ThatS VErY RUDe. mAnNeRS, 2) No SELf-respECTing Near-oMnipoTEnT eNtIty WouLD BOTheR typinG THINGS ouT on AN app uNLEss THeY weRE so BOrInG im geTTing SLEePY eVEN ThinkIng OuT tHIs hYPOThetiCal iM ACtUAlly UsIng A SPEll thAt TRaNSlatES My sPEEcH Into the POstS! yes tHIS DOEs meAn I am chOOSIng fOR MY pOSTs To prESenT LIke THIS no im Not GOINg To ChAnGe It 3)I GoT spIKe To WRItE IT For ME BY BRiBiNg hIm with A frEE lEvEl FOR hIS OgrES & ouBlIeTtes RaNGeR; ANd HE diDNT EvEn DOUbLe cHeCK MY deFiNTioN of "LEVel" iD feEL piTY IF It wasNt for THE faCT That HE reALLy OUGHt To KnOw Better BY noW! AnyWayS i aM OFF tO do Some bEach suRFInG BY WHicH i mEan iM goInG TO gO eNchAnt A BEacH TO MimIc A tuMuLTuOuS OceAN cURreNT: anD THen i hAVe tea and BiScUItS WiTh FLuTTeRSHY So dOnt ExpECT reSPONSES OR do tHiS APP Is VeRY strange cHROnOlOgIcaLlY SpEakING aND ThAts coming fROM Me. TallY Ho;
pERsOnAlLy i dONt MIND iF WE CyCLE FoNts FroM tiMe tO TiME ItS ALways so BOring STICkING to thE gOod ONes aND unLiKe sOmE uNfORtuNatE CreATURes On ThIs plaTFOrM I cAN reGRow My eyeS iF they GET dAMAgEd
i LiKe BeiNG ME: IT ReMINdS Me OF MySeLF. I lIkE I:
you kNow I DID at one poiNT coNsidEr BRInGiNG sOMe trOlLS oVeR TO eQueSTrIA, tHeY WouLd haVe BeEn SUCh A wOndErFUl rocK to Blow THrOUgH HarMonyS gLASS hiVE; IT wouldNT EvEN be THe fIrsT spECieS i IntRoDUcED On A WHIM noT eVEn THe firSt SApienT oNE: buT UnFOrTUnATeLy BetWeeN bEInG The unrUler oF eQuEstRia ANd (pLAy) FIgHtING with CelesTiA And LUna It juST sLIPPEd tHRougH My InsIgHT spONGe, It DIDNt HElp thAt tROlLs ARE JUSt sO vIOLENT AnD I Dont reaLLY lIKE WHEn mY toys kILL EacH othER I CouLd haVe KEpT An eYe On theM BuT I Have tHE paTIEnce of A SPONge tRappED InSiDE AN INsULATeD GlASS dOME LOnGiNGLy LooKiNG AT ThE oNly WATer SOURce INsidE SAId dOME WHIle trYING To deNy tHE NEcESsItY OF wAter fOR my boDily FuNCtIons! wHIcH is To sAy I woUld hAVe Lost iNtereSt AnD ThEn who KNowS HOW MuCh DAmagE And deATH and EUGH woUld bE On My lImBs tHougH MAyBE now I coULD FoISt OFf tHE RESpOnSIbILItY ON spARKle aS sOme KinD oF fRIeNDSHIP LEsSon somEThiNg To cOnSiDer i suppOSe
Why iF i diDNT juSt gET hATe ReaCted By A moST delIgHtfuL cREAtURE OF DIsHaRMONy; i hAve NEveR sEen AN ENtITY So CoMplETEly oUT OF balAnce yEt ALSO PeRfectLY SeT to GRInd AgAINSt ITSeLF! InSTead Of collAPSing liKE a wHiP oF DIaMoNDS InTERLOckeD ANd rENderinG IT UNablE TO aCTUAllY SeveR tHrOuGh fLesH oh wHat a maSTeRpiecE of diShArmOny i am a BIg fAn aND given THE REACtIoN ThEy Are A BiG faN OF me TOO; I UndErSTand I Am qUitE tHe HaNdsome DeMIURgE.
might I JUSt SAy YoU are ONe Of ThE moST PARAdOXICaL CREatURes I hAve eVER sEeN! So mUCH HAtREd bEtween YoUR tWo haLvES oR ShoUlD I SAY oNe HALf RAgInG agAinst tHE sHEER iNDiFfErencE oF THE oThEr nEiTher ablE TO EScApe thE stIcKy tRAp OF tHEIR oWn sElf loaThING! eveN beIng ArOunD yOu woUld nO doubt gIvE mE ThE "VApOuRS" wItH AlL THAT WoNDERFULly jUIcy DishArMOnY yOU GEneRATE jUst By exIStinG.
CAn YOU FEel It? YOU'RE CHANGIn'. yOu'RE ChAngin': yOu'RE ChANgiN': All rIGHt I hOpe You're saTisFIeD BUt if you ain'T: dON'T BLamE me You cAn BLame my friendS ON THE oTheR SIde (YoU goT WhaT YOU WAnted) (BUT yOU lOSt WHat YOU had) OH i DO MIss thaT hIm sUCH a shaME he miSsED THaT debT pAYmeNT bUt hE ShOUld haVe knoWN Better REAlLy HAHahAHa #lyRIcPoSTinG
GoOD AftERnOON chITTR i HOPe ThE BuzzINg ANd proDuCtivE JuIcy pArDon WhilE I GeT OUt MY reADinG tElEscOp AnD stArT goiNg FRont To BaCk ON The DAshboArd!
Oh mY me TroLLbaMa HiMsELf LIkeD ONE of My POsTS i AM DEePLY FLATtERED WHy I might JuST bURST Out inTO SoNg if i wasnT IN THE EXtRemeLy fRagilE GlaSs DiMenSiOn anD JUst HaD wLl My manslAUghTEr cHArGeS APpeAled REGARDLesS I loVE aN EleCTed oFFIcIAl
oh yES i CanT beLIEve i ALmoSt Forgot haPpy PRIdE EVERY "CreatuRE" Make SurE to cAst aSiDE ALl thoSe StiflinG labeLS And reSTraiNts soCiety haVE pLacEd on yOu AnD EMBRacE THe frEeDOM ChaoS PROviDEs OR I gUESS haRmOny DOeS Too but iN A muCH MoRE BOriNG wAy
I am sO ExTREmEly hApPy TO be makinG mY pResence KNOWn on tHIS PlATFoRM In the NAme oF cHaO-I MEAn FRIENdsHip. I lOVE TRolLS sO MucH I hAVE to SAy They oUtClaSs huMANs in teRms of EnjOYabIlity tO obseRVe LAnDiNG ThEM SquArELy In sECoNd PLACe rIGhT nexT tO The aSTaTiNE MedAl hOlDErS! pONiEs, WHaT caN I SAY, I aM A cREatUrE OF bIAs hAHaHah,
oh My me IF tHat ISNt The Cutest litTlE tHIng I HAVE EvER seEN YOu POoR dear mUST bE pOSitIveLY ThIRSTY YOu WAnt sOmE PineappLE FlAVoRED bloOD crEAm,
oH IT IS apPLE fLavoRed But I cAn ruB the piNEs oFf iF YOu iNsist I SUppOSe;
oh WeLL iTs usUaLlY THE OThER WaY ArOund AnD yOu kNOW HOw MUCh I haTE bEing conSISTENt hEhehE
You've been nothing but sweet to me! At least, that's the impression you give off? Uhm.. Unless I'm taking this the wrong way... Sorry....
i MEant THat You WERe tHe ONe uSUaLLY bEIng niCe TO me so im flIpPinG THE scRIpT So To sPEAk ALTHOuGH PERSoNalLy I prefeR sHREDdIng Them Or folDInG thEM InTO PaPer AirpLAneS (YOU WOuLDNt kNOw wHAt tHOse ArE So THInk oF a BIRd full OF ants MADe oF metAL) OR tUrniNG THeM inTO ActUal pRojECTorS SO i cOuLd jUsT WATCh WHaT WERE sUppOseD TO BE acTInG lIke
Ooohhh! I get what you mean now! Haha, Awh! Thanks... Also... Bird full of ants made of metal..?? Huh? Haha, Discord you think of the wildest things!
oh iF onLy IT wAS My IdeA welL okay i dId ACtuaLly FiLL A BiRD fUlL oF Ants Once BUT the aCT was ENTiRELY CoNsENSuaL metAPhOrs arE HArD To COMPRehEnd WhEn SpeAkiNG TO a CREature AS POweRFUl as i AM I suPpoSe