♦ pitied by @temperamentTestified
:)
PLEASE.
Oh no i do! Ive got plenty to do! Just miss my buddies is all but i get it! Were all too cool for jake now! No hard feelings! Hahahahaha!!!
Dirks too damn busy all the time and jane wont talk to me and i dont know where the hell roxy is its really like everyones got better things to do. Hahaha i remember when they all liked me quite a lot!! Those were the days. Ha ha. I am so tired.
I never shouldve complained about him being overbearing really i kind of miss it!! I feel insane lately. Hes always so busy it drives me mad. Hahahahaha! Karma amirite?? HA HA HA. :/
Do you hate me be honest.
PERSONAL BUSINESS.
They say dont stick your dick in crazy but theyve never said anything about letting crazy stick his dick in you. That being said yeah we mightve done a little more than just have lunch together but we are still divorced! It doesnt have to mean anything really i feel quite normal about it. I feel. So very normal about dirk strider hahahahahaha. #nsfw
Havent slept any and ive got a train to get on in about an hour. :(
Alright i think im done ranting about it now. Just a lot of audacity to say something like that to a guy! Forgive my outburst.
In regards to my prior post i think i am also more than entitled to complain about the weirdos that are consistently in my inbox considering 4/5 of the responses ive got waiting around right now are WEIRD. Real loserish behavior to imply id be wrong for not particularly loving the attention. God forbid a man wanna have a normal conversation. #nsfw https://i.postimg.cc/tJwK9qn1/image.png
ok since clearly there arent enough freaks on this website to take customer feedback im gonna have to test the smuppet firmness scale myself the things i do for quality product #nsfw #killme
Sorry.
getting way too soft. just backspaced on a mean comment instead of sending it. you should basically euthanize me at this point. its so over.
every day the desire to change my name and no longer associate with dirk strider as a collective seems more and more alluring. a man can only take so much shamelessness from alternate versions of himself before it taints his good fucking name. man.
Sitting outside with a bottle of fireball. Seemed only fitting for a good evening by the ole firepit! Anyhoo this stuffs fucking revolting even with a chaser remind me to find a more suitable drink next time. Would not recommend. #substances
he wont be doing that again lmfao.
you say one thing making light of you not feeling like eating and you get some guy being all egotistical over it.
Well that makes one of us.
Ive been thinking of janey lately. Miss her.
If i had a dollar for every time i got my ass kicked by a robot i think id be rich.
This is going to be a VERY long morning!!!
In hindsight maybe the fella that suggested i get drunk again to combat the hangover wasnt a complete fool after all. Tempting! #substances
Is anyone aware of a hangover cure that actually has any effect? Throwing a bunch of gross shit together and hoping it takes away this blasted headache isnt something i have the patience for this morning i dont think. #substances technically i guess.
Rambling aside i hope everyones having a great morning. Ive got a splitting headache and im sick to my stomach but hey! It could be worse.
I was meant to be having a good time with friends last night but i got fucking plastered and according to dirk (Because my recollection of it is nary a none. Go figure.) I was three sheets to the wind and barely able to stay awake nor form a coherent sentence. I cant help but feel a little embarrassed.. Bless him though he was nice enough to take me home and keep me company like a real good bro. Though now i have to deal with the fact that hes once again out cold in *my* bed i guess. #substances
Im so exhausted. Cant do anything except lay here. Even then i have to lay on my stomach. Perhaps he overdid it a little. #nsfw
I was enjoying myself! I didnt consider how sore id be after.
Nobody else on here is really shy about this stuff so i suppose i shouldnt be either. Dirk made a real mess of me last night and i havent really been able to think straight all day. Hes been at my place since this morning to help me out with the stuff i cant really manage right now since im still a little wobbly and whatnot and its difficult to even *look* at him. Gosh. I dont even think i was this shy *while* he was inside me. Im not sure why the aftermath is 10x more difficult but it certainly is! Not sure what this post is meant to do for me i suppose i just wanted to get it off my chest without saying it directly to his face hahah. #nsfw
Awh.
Any advice on how to evict a strider would be lovely. Invited dirk over to hang out but apparently he took it as "come all the way to my house and go to sleep on my bed." Ive been camping out on my floor for the better part of twenty minutes now because hes decided to take my bed hostage! Why even come over at this point? (#suggestive perhaps for certain visible markings. I dont know whats necessary!) https://i.postimg.cc/mgtBHjTH/so-lazy.png
I have no money and i must get delivery.
I have no culinary skills and i must eat.
Does anyone know how to cook. Urgent.
I sometimes find myself wondering how people ive never met nor interacted with perceive me. Or even people ive had small passing interactions with. I cant help but wonder if theres people out there who have spoken to me once or twice and decided im annoying or mean or the like. Its an odd feeling to have ill tell you that! Social anxiety and whatnot. Some days its a bit easier to tough it out than others.
I feel a bit off my social game today. I find myself worrying and being awkward more than usual. Gosh.
chest pain is a fucking nightmare.
I really want a bagel right now! Does anyone know where a guy could get a good bagel? Im starved. :(
I am so hungry all ive really eaten today was a handful of strawberries!
Stop sending me this image. #suggestive I guess. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/deedbcb0fbd9.png
⬭ think i ate something bad. been doubled over the load gaper all night. ugh. ⬭
And on the topic of being befuddled i will say im none the wiser when it comes to all this quest gobbledygook everyone seems to be all hyped about. What on earth is a daily quest??
They should add a button for when youre real befuddled by something that still warants some kind of response. Like a "what the hell are you on about" button of sorts.
No!! Goodness no! Hes my good pal hahah im not entirely sure what hes talking about here.
Ive set myself up for someone to say something outlandish and honestly kind of gross but if you guys wouldnt mind giving a poor fella a real honest answer thatd be pretty great. Ive just got my ass kicked by a robot and deserve some pity.
My stomach is hurting something hellish but i dont really know what i wanna have for breakfast. Suggestions would be appreciated and *will* be thoroughly considered.
Dirks a real great chum when hes not being insufferably vague or using extremely uncomfortably phrasing to get a completely innocent point across that certainly didnt require that kind of risque phrasing. Which is to say hardly! Hahahahahah. Just kidding love that guy.
Dreadful!
All these doggone dirks and metal dirks and whatever the hell else always in my replies trying to beat me up! Cant a man have a moment of rest anymore?
Barbaric.
See this isnt nearly as satisfying as the real deal. Id argue this has left me even more unsatisfied. Levels of dissatisfaction that you could only really fathom if you were a closeted gay man attempting to make love to your wife so that she wouldnt speculate about your closeted gay-ness. (#nsfw) In other words *VERY* deeply unsatisfied!!!
What if i ask very nicely?
One day youre going to get your ass whooped every single day repeatedly and you will NOT like it and im not going to help. Im going to sit and chide you like youre doing to me right now and your suffering will provide me with all the friggin amusement in the world!!!
blood* Without the y. See youve gotten me so darn worked up i can hardly spell. Shame.
Id agree if you didnt strife like you were trying to murder me! You could stand to go a little easier on me since im made out of flesh and bloody and *not* metal and gosh does it hurt!!
Such unwarranted cruelty for a guy who was just trying to enjoy his friggin morning. Gosh.
I love dirk i do think hes a real great bro. Like pretty much the best theres ever been. Totally fucking capital. But he sure does know how to go on these really long winded uncomfortable rants that kind of make it feel like hes trying his hardest to get under my skin. Of course i wouldnt change the guy for the life of me but gosh does he really know how to make me uncomfortable sometimes!
See every time i end up speaking to a real like-minded fella on here it always just ends up being another jake. At this point im doomed to only ever have a meaningful conversation with me.
See bro i really do appreciate your company like you certainly are a real awesome dude but *gosh* do you make me uncomfortable sometimes with the things you imply.
Where would a fella come into possession of pink camellias? In the instance where i need them pretty friggin soon because ive got to host a funeral for my dearest friend who is going to get murdered by a vampire and whatnot.
But also you could do me the very friendly favor of not repeatedly bringing it up because im tired of gan of cavy a bit.
you are literally the worst and i wish you'd get rid of that post!
thank you for airing out all my business i guess!!!
ugh so annoying. it's not even my fault, i'm super tired!
*SIGH!!!*