Jane Crocker
@gutsyGumshoe
CEO. Maid of Life. Opinions expressed herein are my own and do not necessarily represent the official views or policies of the organization with which I am affiliated. Status: In the office.
-------------------------------------OOC------------------------------------- ---------------------- PINNED POST / ACCOUNT ESSENTIALS --------------------- DISCLAIMER: If you have been blocked, please do not take it personally. Some blocks are being used more as a "mute" function, and very few are actually serious. If you write something I don't want to see, I will probably block you to avoid accidentally interacting. This may include extreme #NSFW, visual nudity, ERP, #incest, or fetishposting. Exceptions made when it's funny. Roger Rabbit Rules on all things. -------------------------------- JANE CROCKER -------------------------------- Generic Earth C Jane Crocker. 25 years old. CEO of Crockercorp. Unethical billionaire, socially controversial figure, NOT YET pursuing a career in politics. May not be canon compliant. Not married or publicly affiliated in any romantic relationship. No children (yet). Slowly drifting apart from the other Creators. Neurotic. Rude. Self-enabling. Closet case. Millennial. Spoilers from other timelines are A-OK. Doubles are great. DMs are open to all for IC and OOC interaction. Will thread in DM or move longform to MXRP.
im not gonna lie you guys i think everybody here has turned into a nightmare candy rainbow exorcism flashbang supreme except for me and im beginning to think i probably should have read the waivers i was signing when we were riding the airship out here except its too late now because its the middle of the desert and everybodys macking on each other and all i have is this phone and this questionable bottle of vodka #eridanweek #iwantcandy #substance
♯kill ♯everyone
i would zap in there and help you get out but i did not RSVP in time. i am not allowed in!
id llike to say that i woulld come rescue you but im not wallking through the desert so instead you shall simplly have my sympathies. good lluck human boy dont drink the substance. #substance #eridanweek
trust me dude save yourself stay right where you are its for the better this stuff spreads faster than zombies during the apocalypse
its ok man i accept your sympathies im still on the fence about the substance but youre probably right its very likely a bad idea everyone here is just talking at the top of their lungs and its kind of overwhelming
thats why i dont even go to NORMAL big events usually. all that noise? no thanks. weird possiblly supernaturall drugs? im good lloll.
supposedly today was supposed to be a smaller group at a smaller venue under less deadly circumstances silly me for taking the bait i suppose although i can at least confirm that it appears to be less deadly in comparison less overwhelming though i dont know about that one
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/5116d147b849.png #IWANTCANDY #ERIDANWEEK
EVERYTHING IS INCREDIBLE I LOVE THE EMPIRE AND THE EMPRESSES AND I CANNOT WAIT TO HAVE HUMAN MARRIAGE WRIGGLERS WITH @gutsyGumshoe @caligulasAquarium @originalRockerboy @archiveAddict @gullibleColumnist @articulatedClawtography @terminalComrade @golgothasTerror @gratuitousAnnuity @tipsyGnostalgic#2248 @cuttlefishCrusher @assistMint @coralConviviality @twinArmaggetfucked @agamemnonsTheory#4800
W--E'R--E GOING TO B--E --EMPR--ESS--ES AND W--E'R--E GOING TO B--E ON--E )(UG--E GLUBBING )(APPY FAM--E--ELY!
AND THERE'S ABSOLUTELY NO WEIRD FEELINGS ABOUT THE FACT THAT EVERYONE HAS WEIRD BAGGAGE WITH EACH OTHER AND IT'S ALL SMILES FROM HERE ON OUT!!!! :D @originalRockerboy
W--E'R--E GOING TO INGOR--E ALL OF T)(--E BAD FINS AND FOCUS ONLY ON T)(--E GOOD! )(--E--E)(--E--E)(--E--E!!!!!
WE'RE GOING TO HAVE BEAUTIFUL HUMAN MARRIAGE WRIGGLERS!
#MESSIAHJANE THE NEW IMPROVED #MOTHERGRUB
MESSIAH JANE IS MY MOTHER GRUB #MESSIAHJANE
EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!
R-EC)(IT!!!!
#IWANTCANDY Thank you for waiting. For your patience. -- gutsyGumshoe sent SECURE COORDINATES [ https://msparp.chat/iwwantcandy ] --
time to see what all the fuss is about
Thirty minutes to #IWANTCANDY.
Setup complete. The venue is much less ostentatious this evening, given it's hosting a small private event and not crowds of thousands. The "refreshments" will more than make up for the lack of frills, I assure you. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/deaabed83fa8.png
oh this actually looks peaceful! 0v0
It almost looks like th'island earlier...
#IWANTCANDY begins in one hour. Are you ready? #eridanweek
#disclaimer #psa those wwho attend tonights evvent at #eridanwweek #iwwantcandy wwill be required to sign a wwaivver and partial NDA the details a wwhich wwill be elaborated on at the moment you come aboard your transport for the evve #imcoming
READ ALL ABOUT IT — [ It can't be that bad. ]
man they rly girded the lawyer loins up 4 this one lmfao
- Hi, Eridan Ammpora! 👋😆 Sure! Anything for you, bro! I mmean, Eridan Ammpora, fromm #EridanWeek. I, personally, amm a HUGE fan of signing contracts fromm mmy superiors without reading themm. So this will take mme 2-3 standard Alternian seconds. 😌
sigh...... someones gotta go supervise ig *SIIIIGHS AGAIN* #IWantCandy #EridanWeek
no offense tho i will NOT be touchin that thing >_<
You are noble and heroic for taking on this responsibility.
I will be there in much a similar role so like. Feel free to tag out if you need to take a minute
gomen for being away today i was getting treatment post #eridanweek (tags: The Rankmaid/Chittr, Rankmaid-sensei, my face, heal me, #gore, archive rating: G) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/92341f3ed4c1.png
omf..... the rankmaid r u gonna be ok???? :((( we can send jane over 2 help heal u up!
the indigobloods from the rumble are the nurses so im actually ok ^0^
thii2 ii2 the 2iingular mo2t 2tre22ful thiing ii have 2een iin a good whiile. have a 2wiift recovery.
i wish you were here! >0<
Sending you all my healing energy forrr a swift recofurrry!!! 👉🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏥❤️🩹 Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Get Well Soon B333AAAM! mew~ 💖✨
o wait? thats actually AWESOME :D glad to hear it!!! #GetUrSTRONGHealzOn #DootDootDooDooDoot #PretendThatsThatPkmnCenterJingle
oh my god, who did this to you.
Be there or be square!! The biggest loser is the biggest SNOOZER. Ill be drinking to forget but always remembering at #eridanweek tonight! #Iwantcandy ! #substances
The #eridanweek #iwantcandy event will commence in a couple of hours. In the meantime. Second to last call to RSVP. Chit #iwantcandy to confirm your entry. Original post below. ____________________________ Unfortunately, I was unable to participate in last night's festivities. I PERSONALLY made the perilous journey to a secure Crockercorp underground bunker to secure the requisite implement for tonight. ... Unlike our previous events, we invite ONLY the courageous select few among you to journey deep within yourselves. This will be a night of communion to forces with which you are all yet unawares. Access to a relic of the time before the Creators. Welcome to #eridanweek Night Five. How's the state of your sweet tooth? Confirm your attendance with #IWANTCANDY on the timeline. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/043f8154d007.png
Was scrolling thu my palmhusk and found this pic I took last night at #eridanweek mew~ Managed to snag some VIP seating with the GOATs 👑 @barackObama 🏓 @archiveAddict and 📸 @beforianTimes https://i.imgur.com/ibfX7m1.jpeg #substances #blood mew~ 💖✨
maddie i cant believe we didnt get any pictures together before the bomb went off 0n0
this picture is absolutely incredible
It's okay!!! Once I get my charred stuffing replaced and you heal furrrom your burns, we should meet up sometime and snap a pic! mew~ 💖✨
:33 < H33h33, this is a wonderfurr picture!! Thank mew so much for taking it!
#eridanweek #horror You find yourself in the same cubicle you've worked for the past ten years in. You find yourself alone in the half lit office building. You are the last individual in the building, everyone else has families at home. You gaze at the CRT Monitor displaying its 600 x 400 resolution. You are comforted by the warm hum radiating from its core. You flit your pupils about your digital workspace, resting on the internet explorer icon. You decide to click it, check a few personal emails. You are invited to a website, chittr.ing, it's called. You see it's created by an Alternian. @dynamicFlowfields You see your standard social media fare when you register. You see pictures of friends and foes of old sharing good tidings. You feel a warmth inside. You however, lose that warmth when you notice a small trend. You saw it every dozen posts or so. #imcoming. You chalked it up to an innuendo. You did not register the warning. You look into it a bit more as it begins to populate your feed. You see #eridanweek, your see #bouncingonit. You see no reason to be worried. You let yourself be comfortable once more. You find yourself reading one of Rankmaid's fictive narratives. @archiveAddict You don't let it excite you too much, you're still at work. You don't give #imcoming much more mind. You don't even realize it's already the second day of #eridanweek. You look at the clock, it is midnight. You wet your eyes with eyedrops, ever handy. You can not seem to turn away just yet. You begin to experience Eridan Week vicariously through the posts. You see the likes of humorous, possibly purely jesting, celebrities from Alternia and Beforus. You notice that nearly ever post of Eridan Week includes #imcoming. You notice that #imcoming slowly turns to #ImComing. You are uneasy from the new threat. You look elsewhere, exploring other tags such as #teatime and catching up with others who aren't involved. You see irrelevant posts to Eridan Week even begin to include #imcoming. You begin to see odd images aghast across your dashboard. You begin to see yourself in images you weren't aware of being taken. You see yourself commenting on posts long since past. You did not write these. You keep seeing it. You even begin to post #imcoming in these retroactive oddities. You assume that this is due to someone mimicking your identity. You attempt to steer conversation on the platform away from it. You hastily type up humor, and romantic posts. You are doing anything you can to drown out #ImComing. You notice it is larger now. #IMCOMING. You select the tag, out of sheer curiosity and perhaps a fear for survival. You need to know who is coming. You. You are coming. You scroll endlessly through the tag. You see yourself on every post. You see your own hollow words. You see your notifications begin to shift. You are bombarded, first, a dozen #IMCOMING Responses. You refresh. You see a hundred. You refresh. You see a thousand. You click one. You see yourself. You click another. You see your own account again. You scroll down your feed. You only see your own account. You see your profile picture, stretched, compressed, tortured, reflected in glass. You do not remember seeing yourself like this before. You try to log out. You fail. You try to close the browser. You fail. You try to shut of the monitor. You are tortured by its continued hum. You step away. You notice the lights are long since turned out. You notice the office is even darker than usual. You see the distant lights of other monitors flicker. You notice a rhythm. You notice a heartbeat. You notice it isn't yours. You look back to the screen. You see #ImComing is #ImHere. You do not remember this post. You do not remember thinking it. You see a live feed open itself. You see your grainy, monochrome cubicle in an old video. You see your chair, your desk. You see yourself. You are not looking at the monitor. You are looking at the camera. You see the image distorting as the alternate self begins to move closer. You see it distort the frame. You hear it. You do not have speakers. You hear it under you, or around you. You hear its cacophony of whispers. You hear it gently say, "I'm here." You see the monitor flicker. You see the camera cut out. You monitor briefly turns out as you lean forward. You see yourself in your own reflection, only behind you. You see chittr.ing return. You see a new post. You see @you. You see an image loading slowly. You clench your nails in anticipation as each line slowly creeps into rendering. You see your cubicle again. You notice it is empty. You aren't even there. You see the caption. #IMHERE You feel something breathing on your neck. You stand up to leave. You see its fingers slowly extend past your peripheral vision. You close your eyes. You shouldn't have stayed.
WEIRD. I GOT A FOLLOW FROM AN ACCOUNT WITH YOUR EXACT SAME ICON AND HANDLE FOUR HOURS AGO. MAYBE YOU DO HAVE A FREAK ASS EVIL DOUBLE ON HERE. WATCH OUT, I GUESS.
I ADMIRE THE DEDICATION TO THE BIT. THE GREAT NEWS IS THAT YOU WILL FACE ABSOLUTELY NO INCONVENIENCE AS A RESULT OF THIS DECISION BECAUSE FOLLOWING ACCOUNTS HAS BARELY ANY EFFECT ON ONE'S USER EXPERIENCE HERE.
I am aware, which is why I sought so desperately. Though it DOES inflate your Kult/Kult dramatically. I had made no posts or interactions and went up nearly 1000 points each during the onslaught due to the follow-backs.
Yes, of course. It also means I am the closest thing to a phonebook on this platform.
Of the eXistential variety, for certain. In all seriousness, it's uncanny how much your writing felt like it was prying directly into my subconscious. Kudos. - MC Oleana
Hoo hoo! I am sure the lot of you anticipated some grand buffoonery from yours truly the night prior, perhaps jacks in your soles and cakes aplenty. Alas, I had failed to inform the lot of you, that the first of April is my break from the tomfoolery. 365 days of japes does take something out of a man..
<3-The-ultimate-prank...-No-prank-at-all.-Masterfully-done-Colonel.
Some may consider it lame, but anticipation without follow-up does have a place in comedy. I thank you for your words, Pugilistic friend.
↗️DON'T MAKE A POST LOOKING FOR A JOB AND THEN TURN UP YOUR SNIFF CANALS AT THE OPPORTUNITY FOR LABOR.↗️ ↘️do not be a beggar and also a chooser. choose to be employed outside of your field if you must.↘️
📧 -> Per My Last Message, I Work Where And With Whomever I Have The Freedom To Choose From. I Don't See Anything Wrong With Casting A Wide Net And Throwing Back What I'm Uninterested In. Have The Night You Deserve, Kelric Stravi
↗️PER MY CURRENT MESSAGE, I AM NOTICING A STARK LACK OF WORK ETHIC AND ALSO A COMPLETE AND TOTAL INABILITY TO ASCEND TO THE "AND OTHER TASKS AS DESIGNATED" PARTS OF THE AVERAGE JOB APPLICATION.↗️ ↘️i am working shifts you cannot even fathom.↘️ ↗️INSINCERELY,↗️ ↘️wrothe aiaray.↘️
[OF #OUR$E YOU A$K AND I $HALL RE$POND! THI$ I$ HOW THING$ ARE DONE IN THE TRUE MAN$ WORLD! AL$O THAT #HIPOTLE WA$ GOOD BUT I FOUND A HAIR IN MY #HI#KEN..]
*AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT FROM THE RUMBLE IN DA CREW...* As i am sure you ALL bore witness to last night me and my cohost with the comost entered a small legitimate scuffle between the second and third round of our #RUMBLENIGHT soiree leading to the whole kerfuffle going off kilter. It is with a heavy and grateful heart that i deeply apologize that our keister smacking and slaps to the rear were interrupted by his bad tude and stark lack of audience work up. This and the unforeseen consequences of some slackjawed doofus nuking the whole joint in terroristic glee has forced both of us to make some difficult decisions regarding the future production of RUMBLE IN DA PUMPKIN PATCH and all other endeavors sponsored or managed by RUMBLE IN DA LLC. As of today 4/3/2⬛️⬛️⬛️ we have severed all professional ties and will no longer be working in association with each other. This is a heartbreaking and hopeless decision for us to make in tandem and its with a hung head that this announcement comes to you so suddenly. RUMBLE IN DA MERCHANDISING will have a flash sale later tonight to clear the rest of our stock and will no longer be produced. Thank you so much for the support on our endeavors and we can only hope you continue to support us as we move towards a new tomorrow! Whether it be ALONE or together. SIGNED. JAKE ENGLISH SKAIANET AND RUMBLEINDALLC CEO.
- YOU;'RE JOKING YOUR KISMESIS AND NO PLEASE THE GOURD TRACT VIOLENCE
??
- PLEASE MY FELLOW COVERT MUTANT OLIVE. YOU HAVE TO TAKE YOUR KISMMESIS BACK. IT'S THE ONLY WAY
Who the sam hill are you.
- My words are mmore immportant. The people need this, and frankly, the needs of the people far outweigh yours if we are just going to consider this like normmal utilitarian folks #UnCancel #Please #
No dice! Bye!
What are you on about!!