Jane Crocker
@gutsyGumshoe
CEO. Maid of Life. Opinions expressed herein are my own and do not represent the official views or policies of the organization with which I am affiliated. Status: Working for the weekend.
OOC || UPDATED PINNED POST || Jane Crocker. Earth-C. Link to Carrd and gallery below. May discuss NSFW, NSFWE, extreme violence. All art is the writer's.
I don’t need to ask who want me. I don’t need that kinda negativity in my life
A rapid-fire round of quizzes which I also encourage you to take. It's perfectly normal to be curious about peer data concerning subjects of identity, emotion and connection. So you can mark just how entirely average your scores are in comparison. Entirely average. Bog standard. Scores. Worth noting that the "love style" assessment regards which sorts of affection you prefer to receive, rather than the sort you most comfortably distribute yourself.
hey how bout that last one
I'm uncertain as to why the final link remained masked! Here it is again, for posterity.
ok cool. also but hey what's with those totally average results on the last one there chica
I don't understand the question. What do you mean "what's with" them.
"Entirely average. Bog standard. Scores." you sure those are average
It's my hunch that the so-called "average" scores are seeded with bias.
ok yea i just took the anger one this thing is rigged
oOH, tHESE LOOK FUN TO DO, aND YEAH OKAY,
THANK you.
>([lig#t was gay as fuck i wouldnt #ave let a bad bitc# like misa misa go like dat tb#]
I feel it bears no explanation.
i AM, k1ND OF SURPRISED YOU HAVE PLACED l, uP ABOVE lIGHT, iN TH1S, tO BE ENT1RELY HONEST,
I would put Misa at A at least, but otherwise fine.
... Why do you say that.
Getting frozen yogurt. Poll of public opinion! <3 for my order- half cake batter yogurt, half cheesecake yogurt. Strawberries, waffle cone pieces, strawberry sauce drizzle, and sprinkles. Eaten with caution not to overmix. <3< for @golgothasTerror's order- Cotton candy yogurt, caramel yogurt, an ENTIRE SUGAR COOKIE (reported to be stale), strawberry AND blackberry "popping boba," white chocolate chips, and Swedish Fish. Stirred vigorously into a noxious gray sludge before consuming.
For the win!!
Dont dog the potion until youve howled at the moon at least once.
AAAAAAAAAND THE SECOND. @gutsyGumshoe, EAT YOUR PUSHER OUT. IS THIS PROOF ENOUGH FOR YOU. OF MY RIDICULOUS BULLSHIT PSEUDOSCIENTORTUROUS "ALPHA BEAST" STATUS, OR SOMETHING. HERE. TAKE MY CRUMB. NO FURTHER COMMENT.
yOU ARE SO GOOD AT, aLL THAT OTHER STUFF, yOU SHOULD BE MORE CONFIDENT IN YOURSELF, bUDDY!
BECAUSE IT'S *SUCH* A FUCKING CRIME TO DOUBT BEING THE HOTTEST SHIT EVER TO WALK THE SURFACE OF THE NURSERY WORLD. COME THE FUCK ON. WOULD YOU RATHER I BELIEVED WITH MY WHOLE PUSHER THAT I COULD DO NO WRONG AND FUCK NOTHING UP? A GOOD LEADER IS ONE WHO *CAN DOUBT. DOUBT MEANS YOU'RE PAYING ATTENTION.
i GUESS, tHAT'S WHY YOU'RE OUR LEADER, kARKAT }:D
Visiting Jake for the weekend and taking GREAT CARE not to disturb the careful ceiling-high accumulation of tchotchkes, hoarded junk, and various stuffed large game occupying his space. Which is how I tell you I got up to use the bathroom and stubbed my foot on the giant, open fanged maw of a taxidermied cholerbear rug in the dead of night.
(๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ GASSSSSSSSSSSSPPPP YOUR HUSBANDO TOOK YOU AWAY TO HIS DEMON CASTLE ♫ (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ WHERE ALL OF HIS WEIRD TAT IS!! ♫ ╰(*´︶`*)╯ AND IT ALL CONVEYS HIS DARK AND TRAGIC BACKSTORY AS A COOL RAINBOW DRINKER WHO'S SAD AND ALONE BUT YOU CAN FIX HIM!!! YOU HAVE THE KEYS TO HIS DEAD AND COLD BLOOD PUSHER! ♫
I don't even have a cutting remark loaded. Who the hell are you.
☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆ OMG HIIIIIIIIII ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆ My name is Cyphel and I'm a ninja girl from the hidden leaf village where I live with my husbandos Sasuke and Naruto who KISS EACH OTHER TOO!!!! ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆ And I have a very active SlayO3 would you like to read my stories? ♫
If I wanted to sit in the presence of two men making our outing about THEIR romantic entanglement, I'd already know where to direct myself. :|
(´｡• ω •｡`) Well duhhhh their main focus should be YOU! ♫ (´｡• ω •｡`) But the point is that they kiss each other because YOU said so!!! ♫ (´｡• ω •｡`) You're the one in control and you keep them on a tight leash! ♫ (((o(*°▽°*)o))) AND THEN AND THEN THEY BEG YOU TO LET THEM GO ♫ (((o(*°▽°*)o))) AND YOU SAY NUH UH UH BOYS! THIS IS CYPHEL'S SHOW AND YOU'RE GREENLIT FOR THE NEXT EIGHT PROGRAMMING BLOCKS! ♫
... Huh.
Ranking excluding Creators or Creator-adjacent individuals.
Eh. I'll take it.
fucking yikes????
.....arent y·u a human.....
Wasn't your last post about the way you physically cannot tell human beings apart? :B
You'll be fine.
You're one of the one or two. :B
No durr.
Unreal Heiress, place an order to populate my new office aquarium.
wHAT A SWEET LOOKING FELLOW, tHERE,
who let sea bunnies b so cute? especilly cause u cant touch em due to bein toxic
(｡•ᴗ•｡) Oh wow, what kind of lusus is that?? ♫
A couple of you guys,, are dime-store perverts, but a few of you really go above and beyond,,, to be dollar-store perverts.
You CAN coerce me into a private and dubiously intimate hang with the promise of a "Nailed It" marathon. How I love to bray with obnoxious laughter at the expense of these culinary simpletons!
hOW ABOUT A PRIVATE AND, nOT DUBIOUSLY INTIMATE, hANG SESH?
Id still eat them!
... The dubious nature of your removal of the word dubious strikes me. Is it no longer dubious because it is or isn't intimate?
I know, son. I know.
I get it, i understand. I know my place,, don't worry, ill go trot off like a horse with a lame leg just call me when you're ready to make a stop by the glue factory, you can use my remains to make sentimental tchotchkes and knick knacks with your NEW SON.
... I don't know that he's new, per se! Judging by your profiles, he's a smidge older than you.
The silent implication that you do wish to make tchotchkes and knick knacks with him is a dagger through my heart "Mother"
The Crocker Estate sits on a comparatively meager 710 acres, but at a mere fraction of the lot size DOES take inspiration from gardens of the Palace of Versailles. Point of saying so being that I'm in the market to decide the theme of the new pavilion! I am downright STUMPED on the decision between a butterfly garden and topiary hedges themed after The Teddy Bear's Picnic.
༻𐫱༺ 𝒽ave you conssidered letting t𝒽e grassss grow as it wantss and introducing ssome wildflowerss for native pollinatorss🌻 ༻𐫱༺
I think the butterfly garden idea is *very* refined (after goregling what a butterfly is). What a magnificent, noble creature... That is my vote.
Not even momentarily, no.
༻𐫱༺ Sssuc𝒽 a ss𝒽ame🌻 You could create ssome wonderful ecossysstemss🌻 Yet you c𝒽oosse to remain painfully limited to keep a veneer of control🌻 ༻𐫱༺
I think the Teddy Bear's Picnic theme is a really neat idea especially going off that inspo pic there.
bUTTERFLIES, aRE VERY PRETTY, aND i THINK COULD BE NEAT, tHE CHOLERBEAR IS K1ND OF SCARY, tO ME,
The completed sculpture will be of a harmless sewn plush bear- and a juvenile, at that.
Dagnabbit, my embed fail.
tHE YOUNG ARE OFTEN, tHE MOST DANGEROUS TO BE AROUND, bECAUSE IF THEY ARE HERE, tHEIR GUARDIANS ARE LIKELY NEARBY AND, rEADY TO MAUL, aNYTHING ENCROACH1NG UPON THEIR WARD OR WARDS,
D'aww.
feast your unwworthy orbs upon the kickass interdimensional headquarters a the council of eridans the HOPESPIRE my glorious seat a powwer from wwhich i wwatch ovver all matters pertainin to hope and wwhen necessary its swwift and decisivve destruction through the magnificent and indomitable energies creation itself has invvested wwithin me #hopespire #eridancouncil #mytowwer #myspire #myepicspire
i mean it is mainly wwhere the batteries are kept but i like wwhere your think pan is at
wwell its nice a you to share your scent related fantasies wwith us ter thanks
Awww! 38) So sweet! I am so )(appy you are back into magic again! I s)(ould visit and give you a tower warming present!
long as its not another livve laugh glub sign
It was not going to be t)(at. 38/
IS IT ERIDANS ONLY IN THERE. OR IS IT ONE OF THOSE SITUATIONS. WHERE YOU SAY IT'S ALL BOYS. BUT IN TRUTH. YOU'VE INVITED ALL YOUR OTHER WHORES. EXCEPT FOR ME. #BOYSNIGHT #STILLBITTER.
#myspire mogs the fuck out a #yourspire
wwhat sort a honorless slug wwould i evven be to bar paradox spaces most dedicated chilly chaser from the glory of royalblood vvalhalla
DOES THAT MEAN YOU’RE GOING TO TURN YOUR LOCATION ON. PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE. #ONEGAI.
/wen i was hatched who𝐋e caverns were hot cuz u kno tht shit was fire 🔥🔥
Was it your sister that did the damage~? I was lead to believe it was just his excessive headphone usage~.
its actually just a side effect OF HIM BEING A LOSER CHUD
oh yeah baby open up for this entire school a someones krilldads i just orphaned
࣪⊹₊˚{ you sound like my lusus.... }<_\{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪
i guess that means you can call me hrrk daddy
࣪⊹₊˚{ ummmm }˚₊⊹ ࣪
࣪⊹₊˚{ I NEED TO GO }*ᯅ*{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪
I EXPECT A CERTAIN LEVEL OF ECCENTRICITY FROM THE EXTRATERRESTRIAL BUT SOME OF YOU FOLKS ARE CUCKOO-DOODLE-DOO.
sORRY,
Not you, dearheart.
Oh dear, what horrors have you faced today, Miss Crocker?
wwonder wwho this cuck you speak a is
y1PPEE! i AM REGULAR, aND HAVE A SWEET PETNAME, yAY!
Unreal Heiress, play Using You by Mars Argo.
TOLIGHT, AT #ABCC. HOWL'S MOVING CASTLE #WATCHPARTY. FIGHT FOR THE LAST SPOT. SHOW ME SOME BLOOD. #GETIN, ASSHOLES. https://hyperbeam.com/i/qdBKVZVz
AAAAAAAND WE'VE INSTANTLY REACHED CAPACITY. SO LONG, ASSHOLES. IF YOU DIDN'T GET IN TOLIGHT, MAKE SURE YOU RSVP FOR FRIDAY'S SHOWING ON THIS CHITT, HERE.
LOST THE WHORE-OFF TO A HUMAN. SHOULD I #CW-SELF-HARM MYSELF. #CRONUSBABEOFF.
I said I wasn't proud, not that I wasn't competitive.
Its 0kay damara. Jane is rigged 0r s0mething
YOU WOULD THINK. ***SOMEBODY.*** WOULD PULL SOME ***STRINGS.*** TO SECURE MY FATE. BUT I GUESS HE'S NOT LOOKING AT HIS PALMHUSK. WHICH HE CAN ALWAYS SEE. WITHOUT NEEDING TO CHECK IT.
WE ARE MOST ASSUREDLY TALKING ABOUT DIFFERENT GUYS.
oh yeah my b megidork said like mega dork i just figured jane should win entirely and devastatingly in your place nothing personal im just extremely biased against you specifically
WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM???? DO I KNOW YOU????
im friends with your boss which basically makes me like your fraternal uncle in utero while you were a fetus i was ruining your chances of getting a promotion at the country club swinging nine irons and carrying a caddy for your extradimensional daddy im like the human version of the glass ceiling that your silly ass light up rocket shoe eyes will have to wipe tears over for generations to come youre the handmaid im the hand your ass right back to you on a platter made im also like so fucking with you we have like no prior relationship outside of cali b
If you can guess which movie's promotional images we used to inspire the pose in the photoshoot, you win a prize.
https://i.postimg.cc/3R7zNq6G/image-2026-07-08-202455241.png
You're next.
what