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Caduceus Revolver Lalonde

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@asclepianDesperada

earth c troll. adopted. yes thats my real middle name, shut Up. also magic is real & jade harley could solo dragon ball

Blood: AnonymousKult Score: 347Kull Score: 73914 followers12 following
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

im glad i live in such a diverse town tbh. i once genuinely had 2 explain 2 some human from like, cusackton, how kismesissitude wasnt toxic??? i mean jfc me and @starstuddedSalticid are p much living proof of that lol

Kult: +10
Kull: +5
Total: 15
Ratio: 2.00

right???????? Perfect reLationshiP over here. .) it's just so easy to fuck with you.

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

@dynamicFlowfields srsly why am i verified???????????

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

WHY IS MY MUM WHITE

Kult: +15
Kull: +15
Total: 30
Ratio: 1.00

why arE you brItIsh thats thE rEaL quEstIon

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Zoologically Dubious Caduceus
An ominous omen for a complacent wizard.
@uranianUmbra[UU]

i don't want to talk aboUt it.

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

i have 2 moms i have 2 differentiate somehow

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

why tf am i verified.

Kult: +10
Kull: +5
Total: 15
Ratio: 2.00
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

thx hatebot. i guess??

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

i would tbh. i'm sexy as hell and my boobs r huge. ~u@ #selfcest

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

ok why the fuck is this white guy following me. i get the worst fucking vibes from this guy??

Kult: +49
Kull: +47
Total: 96
Ratio: 1.04
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

oh cool he has alts 2. fuck off???????????

thats just how it feels on a weekend in a college town

Then you have a good nose for sniffing out creeps. Block him, if that even does anything. Don't listen to a word he says.

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

Ugh, ok im gonna guess thats a thing that makes sense 4 old ppl from old earth and nobody else bc thats half of the shit U say ~_@

Consider it a mere curiosity. We are related, from a certain transitive point of view, and you exist in a dark spot far beyond my illuminating gaze. That alone is of great interest to me.

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Zoologically Dubious Caduceus
An ominous omen for a complacent wizard.
@uranianUmbra[UU]

i'm going to tell you once, doctor. stay the bloody hell away from my daUghter. i have more narrative sway than yoU sUrely realize, and she is *not* yoUr plaything. do not make me pick Up the pen.

I am rarely swayed by threats, Ms. Calliope. Fear is not an emotion that grips me often, nor is it one that motivates me. Still, you have nothing to fear from me in turn. For now, I am merely an observer, as I often am. And if you come to be in need of me, then I will serve as an excellent host as well.

Kull: +5
Total: 5
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Zoologically Dubious Caduceus
An ominous omen for a complacent wizard.
@uranianUmbra[UU]

this conversation is over.

[thegoodScratchdoctor's typewriter exploded.]

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

fake ppl r the worst. "oh lets hang out after club" U and i both know U despise me. ppl should be Up fucking front abt their feelings!

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

omg its happening @starstuddedSalticid this is it!!!!!!!!!!! #dashwatching

Kult: +100
Kull: +95
Total: 195
Ratio: 1.05

yeah, it's weird for me too. uh. ........ sooo, how do i not get headaches from the cursed eye?

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@arachnidiansGrasp[AG]

Oh please don't tell me you inherited my vision 8fold........

and the eviL brain Powers :(

(( pretend she said .(

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@arachnidiansGrasp[AG]

That's awful. 8est advice I can give is ditch the eye as fast as possi8le, 8ut please try NOT to lose your arm in the process. Do not take after me in that regard.

weLL, i cover it with my hair! and one of those cushy medicaL eyePatches but then everyone caLLs me a chuuni >.(

i don't think i'm ready to Lose an eye...

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@arachnidiansGrasp[AG]

I think I still have my old eyepatch with the infinity sign on it somewhere.

an INFINITY???????? that's so fucking cooL! gimme the code on the back and i'LL Peer Pressure caddie to aLchemize it for me, LoL. oh sPeaking of caddie, we're stiLL on her Post... um, shouLd we dm?

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@arachnidiansGrasp[AG]

Sure, why not.

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_t8phb7PSwT1avfjjg.mp4 ok i know video doesnt embed but this is just a demonstration of the raw Unadulterated power of the harp

Kult: +10
Total: 10
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

when r there gonna b hemoanon options on here besides fucking grey... like half the hemoanons i know dress in candy or lime or rainbows (@starstuddedSalticid subchit lmao)

Kult: +5
Kull: +5
Total: 10
Ratio: 1.00

honestLy??? yeah. i get its an aLternian website and aLL, but you'd think if they aLLow hemoanon oPtions in the first PLace they shouLd Let you get funky!

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

ngl it kind of pisses me off that some candy reds act like they have a monopoly on hemoanonymity. "ohh on alternia we wouldve been culled so its offensive 4 other castes 2-" ok 1st of all we rnt on alternia. if the only trolls who go gray r candy red. then whats even the bloody point of going gray. #earthc

Kult: +35
Kull: +20
Total: 55
Ratio: 1.75

me and my grey #MyGrey

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

There literally isn’t a fucking poikt to it- just fucking say you’re a rust blood and nobody will pay attention to you

Kull: +5
Total: 5
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

i do NOT want 2 hear UR opinions on hemoanon dude U called me a slur in my inbox!!

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

“Hemoanon Motherfucker” is not a slur

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

lmfao @ ana getting instantly got by @ least 3 creators. play stupid games honey~ ;U

Kult: +5
Kull: +10
Total: 15
Ratio: 0.50

this time i'm reaLLy gonna do it, LaLonde.

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

oh my god he even has a katana??? and people call ME a weeb 4 my correct anime opinions

Kult: +20
Kull: +25
Total: 45
Ratio: 0.80

no, we caLL you a weeb because you're obsessed with PowerscaLing. just watch the fucking cartoon, dumbass! ,)

Kull: +5
Total: 5
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

U literally co-run anime club w/ me if im a weeb Ur a weeb 2 ~_@

Kull: +5
Total: 5

not aLL of us are so sensitive about that, caddie~

Kull: +5
Total: 5
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

U want me so bad it makes U look stupid

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

how do U make it so 2 specific people AND ALL VARIATIONS THEREUPON cant see Ur posts and vice versa i do NOT wanna see my mama getting horny on here. or my mum but i havent seen any alts of her.

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

guys who was it who had like a bajillion guns Up 4 sale they had green text and r basically the only reason i downloaded this app

Kult: +65
Kull: +60
Total: 125
Ratio: 1.08
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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

what the fuck is a 2922 do U mean a 1911???????????

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

Ah this is one of those timeline differences isn’t it? We’ll go with yes

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

oh Ur from alternia arent U. everythings always fucked Up on alternia and has some extra stupid name.... w/e point is yes i want them!! actually wait just tell me the code on the back of the card first. i wanna Uhhhhh... confirm theyre real.

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

Card..?

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

yea the bloody captcha card dude. please tell me Ur Universe has sylladices??

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

No??? Wtf is a sylladice?

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

ok i guess U live in the dark ages or some shit despite having a computer??? Ugh. whatever a sylladex is Ur inventory its how U store a bunch of stuff and like half the time it Uses some fuckass fetch modus that confuses the shit out of U 2 the point where U just Use a normal physical backpack. but fine yeah i guess ill just trust U that theyre real?? if Ur ripping me off my moms can kick Ur ass so its fine

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

Did you just threaten me?

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@asclepianDesperada[AD]

i dont think that counts... sorry tho i promise i want Ur guns!!!

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@miraculousMerchant[MM]

Dm me