Jake English
@golgothasTerror
Skaianet CEO and PROUD consort king! • 25 • he/him • please submit all personal inquiries to jakeenglish@skaia.net! 💥🎃👊RUMBLE IN DA PUMPKIN PATCH SHOOTS IN FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE!!👊🎃💥
LIGHTS CAMERA ACTION. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/86f8d78a85fc.png
Nobody ever wants to chow down on ol jakes sweet potato and asparagus casserole.
I wouldn't say nobody~.
This Made My Physically Recoil, Thank You.
I w⚣uld... try it?
me and @golgothassterror after falling for another ai generated mug and then getting cursed by an etsy witch https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/93a89839cec4.jpg
@golgothasterror fuck i tagged the wrong jake joke ruined i have to die now
Happy pride month folks!!
SOOrry yOOur a day late ^^'
Huh?
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/be20abd84dcd.png //out of character. eridan would never post this but i would @gutsyGumshoe @commandingAuthority @caligulaAscendit @adiosToreador
hAPPY TO BE OF SERVICE,
((help this is killing me))
That is not vwhat I look like.
wwhy wwould you post this eribro
i didnt post anythin actually if you think about it nothin that happens on this thread is real
W)(at.
You cant just have a one man harlem shake...
I wonder how many honest to goodness fellas assume im of the european steeze strictly by the way i get on about the web. I think im just more mush mouthed than anything. Personally anyway!
Its like france and stuff!
Bro i think itd be awful difficult to give you the full lowdown youre a poor fish out of water. Fella doesnt even know france. Hes never seen the french dispatch.
Shopping trip. #BettyCrocker #Reup #NeedMyMix #Yummers!
Oh, I daresay between the two of us, you're built more like the fork!
did it take you 8 minutes to come up with a way to call me skinny. you want me to give you anautter eight and sea if you can come up with somefin else or shoald we just leave it there
I was scrolling at a leisure-pace through the reacts and comments when I happened upon this obvious display of your fixation on me, actually! At this point, the only impression which you have made upon me is that the moment I do anything, you are pacing angrily around your own hive, muttering to yourself and pulling your braids in distress. So shall we leave it at the petty shit-flinging or would you care to explain why it is you keep such a keen eye on my profile? :B
havent acknowledged any of yo cries for attention in days but aight gill whatebber shellps you eat at night. hard naut to sea this one when it took up the whole dam dashboard is all im sayin
yOU LOOK, sO PRETTY jANE, iN EVERY PHOTO YOU TAKE, aND ALSO THE STUFF LOOKS GOOD TOO, yOU KIND OF REMIND ME RIGHT THERE, oF A STRONG AND INDEPENDENT BUSINESS MINDED WOMAN, nOT AFRAID OF THE POTENTIAL ENV1RONMENTAL REPERCUSSIONS OF HER ACTIONS, iN GENERAL, fILLING HER FOUR-WHEELED GROCERY PRISON W1TH wONDERBREAD, i'M NOT SURE WHY THAT THOUGHT SPRUNG UP FULLY FORMED, iNTO MY PAN, bUT IT'S THERE NOW, uMM,,, sPARKLE ON, aND STAY YOU! bYE,
Oh, hmmm! I could tell you!! Who helps me eat at night, that is. But I think you could take a whack at satisfying your own curiosity. Believe me. He is more than willing to leap out of bed to grab us BOTH some hard-earned concessions.
believe me girl i dont care what dude you pay to bump human extra-uglies with you every night
You're a worse entrepreneur than I thought if THAT paltry crap is all you have to sell me! :B I think you do! I find you terribly concerned with the man in my britches! WHY you're so affixed to the thought is another matter entirely. There are two possible explanations, and only one gives me fever-chills of total disgust.
W)(Y are you are you inventing a thought in MY pan. is yours so stuffed full of crocker brand supermoist chocolate fudge cake you got no room left? i dont care. idk if you get off on the idea of me mullin over what blind buoytoy might be chubby chasing you but i prawnmise you can take yo hands out your pants i got bigger fish to fry (dont start sniffin the screen and droolin that fish is mine)
Great question! I highly encourage consumers to zhoosh up their box mixes. As a matter of fact, one of my favorite uses of our Super Moist cake mix is to modify the recipe into a sumptuous cookie dough. :B The texture is incredibly soft and chewy. Like a less dense frosted sugar cookie. I top it with a coating of crispy royal icing once it's cooled for a layer of snap.
/shakes fist angrily >:O betty crockerrrr!
Hoo hoo hoo!
Frankly i guess im a little green about all these clam happy englishes running tootsweet with their happily claimed ankle biters. I thought for a long time maybe i was incapable of junk like that but maybe it really is just a *me* thing. Like maybe other mes have got their noggins screwed on straight and im stuck in the muck being some kind of silly boy about the little things.
There's worse Jakes to be, believe me.
Well durr yeah i think being someones skippy ol pappy is the worst it can get.
some experiences arent for everyone! i think it is totally okay for you to explore life at your own pace without feeling too weird about not sharing some experiences with your alternates. i know that i dont really want to share some of those experiences mine have had... -_-
Oh jade. You always know just what to say to cheer a fella up. Hey is your icon off kilter or is it just me seeing things a little screwy.
no it totally is! i keep forgetting to adjust it.
I dunno! Its always a little funny seeing a bunch of random dick tom and harrys razz those of the striderian kin. Ought to have the ability to throw tomatoes at the screen.
tomatoes would be() pretty fucking great right about now;
Considering #RumbleNight never came to full fruition, there's no harm in posting one or two of the early promotional photos.
Lik£, OMFG. Lik£, twirling my lik£, hair RN. Lik£, WOW. Lik£, OMG.
Oh my god. (Respectfully!!)
THATS MY MESSIAH THATS MY MESSIAH -posted from My Nukia N-Gage CullD
back off of her you dAFT fucking beast -posted from My Nukia N-Gage CullD
you call this fat i call this slim thicc at best thank cod they canceled #rumblenight because the last thin you need is more cardio once and for all i refuse to be associated wwith the cadre a simps in your comments no im a different breed entirely im not a simp but a snarlbeast in search a vvoluptuous vvixens wwhose slaptastic bellies are wworthy a bein my prey you are so flabby it makes a growwn ass seadwweller wwant to cry
youre like a dainty and feminine little bag a feathers jane you rest gracefully on a single blade a grass subsistin off one dewwdrop at a time youre literally a molecule wwhat more do i got to say
My word, Miss Crocker. Stunning doesn't even come close to how you look here... We are all. Ahem. Incredibly lucky to have your magnanimity on full display here. Tablet end chit. End chit. No don't keep posting words I said END CHIT. I DONT WANT TO COME OFF TOO STRONG YOU INFERNAL THING END CHIT.
bIg aNd bEaUtIfUl. YoU Go oN 'n sHoW 'eM WhAt tO ExPeCt wHeN ThEy tRy tO KnUcKlE-Up wIt' ThE BoSsIeSt bItChIn' BoSs-bItCh. :o)
Reminding me of my new pal @cuttlefishCabbalist ! This dudes eating corn through a picket coral fence to boot too. Heh. Hes like if the two of us mixed and made something funky! https://i.pinimg.com/736x/5b/10/9d/5b109d8067eeb0bb8f9d1cd05d24272a.jpg
This is so funny. Are you coming tonight.
Coming where? :)
Errr...
?
Gotta go! Me and the ol bffeferi are playing table pong! Instead of doing shots every time we win we take little sips of ice cream from the flower of a hibiscus. Toodles!
What?
Sorry, what??
Everythings coming up english!
I was QUITE ceremoniously invited to appear on the next episode of Rumble! After clearing my schedule, having the garments for the event custom-tailored, and hauling myself all the way down to the Patch, it was only after physically climbing into the ring that I discovered that we CANNOT proceed. Because someone (@golgothasTerror) couldn't hit me. Or even stage-hit me. Or even convincingly raise his fist to me. We tried for over an hour. I thought he was going to toss his cookies from sheer stress at one point. We cut the line on that catch when he began to sizzle and glow. I suppose I ought to find it sweet, but I'm moreso inconvenienced by the way I am squeezed into this MINUSCULE leather getup with nowhere to take it. :|
PARDON!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?
Oh did you lose the ability to read? What a shame. Sorry to hear about your loss.
Oh, just ignore her. You know the old saying. Don't feed the you-know-whats.
The mutts in this case!
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Failed embed lmao
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Okay just copy and paste it.
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHHA
wwait i wwas in the middle a somethin and replied in haste before i got to the part wwhere youre not joinin rumble no hell no hell fuckin no
Catc)( @golgot)(asTerror and I doing t)(is today. )(ttps://i.pinimg.com/736x/d8/d8/2e/d8d82ee0ca44ad9a64f911a84f7c0836.jpg
Push it push it!
I'M PUS)(ING IT. I'M PUUUUUUS)(ING IT. I am going to lift t)(e mac)(ine everyt)(ing is R-EALLY lig)(t. 3XO
You know a dude likes to break out the good chow on a hellacious friday! https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/feb859506377.jpg
mm mmm mm save me a helping of that can sludge
You know it my girl up top with the slop.
Well this is just plum embarassing for me.
:/
I dunno if your brofy meant all that much if some random ol ragamuffin is taking you to the wayside.
Everyones wetting their britches about a dude getting tootsweet on the timeline. Tighten your belts boys thats usually how it is for him! #vaguepost #NOTvaguepost #missingmyfishing
Successful pancake flip. Yep! I bet youre green over there. Not everyone can do it the way ol jake does.
I red.
youre the one thats green man
Im learning so many colors in the comments here dude its like blues clues in here.
... Unreal Heiress, play No Children by The Mountain Goats.