Jake English
@golgothasTerror
Skaianet CEO and PROUD consort king! β’ 25 β’ he/him β’ please submit all personal inquiries to jakeenglish@skaia.net! π₯ππRUMBLE IN DA PUMPKIN PATCH SHOOTS IN FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE!!πππ₯
LIGHTS CAMERA ACTION. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/86f8d78a85fc.png
Be there or be square!! The biggest loser is the biggest SNOOZER. Ill be drinking to forget but always remembering at #eridanweek tonight! #Iwantcandy ! #substances
Dagnabbit. I was trying to be a stand up fella and help another guy handle his rod but the poor sucker got spooked by a second hand and called the whole thing off. #fishingfriday always seems to be spoiled by some quickdraw finishing early! Phooey.
Also i caught no fish i guess.
Aye. That can happen. A fella can b'ne\/\/\/\/ t'th'\/\/\/\/hole idea o' lettin' ano'er handle yer rod. Yer grip can be intimidatin'! Make sure that \/\/\/\/hen y'pass yer rod, y'grab underneath the shaft an' firmly at the base o'th'handle.
I tried! I suppose all that baiting got my hands slicker than all get out though because my palm kept slipping up and down that poor fellas pole.
*AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT FROM THE RUMBLE IN DA CREW...* As i am sure you ALL bore witness to last night me and my cohost with the comost entered a small legitimate scuffle between the second and third round of our #RUMBLENIGHT soiree leading to the whole kerfuffle going off kilter. It is with a heavy and grateful heart that i deeply apologize that our keister smacking and slaps to the rear were interrupted by his bad tude and stark lack of audience work up. This and the unforeseen consequences of some slackjawed doofus nuking the whole joint in terroristic glee has forced both of us to make some difficult decisions regarding the future production of RUMBLE IN DA PUMPKIN PATCH and all other endeavors sponsored or managed by RUMBLE IN DA LLC. As of today 4/3/2β¬οΈβ¬οΈβ¬οΈ we have severed all professional ties and will no longer be working in association with each other. This is a heartbreaking and hopeless decision for us to make in tandem and its with a hung head that this announcement comes to you so suddenly. RUMBLE IN DA MERCHANDISING will have a flash sale later tonight to clear the rest of our stock and will no longer be produced. Thank you so much for the support on our endeavors and we can only hope you continue to support us as we move towards a new tomorrow! Whether it be ALONE or together. SIGNED. JAKE ENGLISH SKAIANET AND RUMBLEINDALLC CEO.
- YOU;'RE JOKING YOUR KISMESIS AND NO PLEASE THE GOURD TRACT VIOLENCE
??
- PLEASE MY FELLOW COVERT MUTANT OLIVE. YOU HAVE TO TAKE YOUR KISMMESIS BACK. IT'S THE ONLY WAY
Who the sam hill are you.
- My words are mmore immportant. The people need this, and frankly, the needs of the people far outweigh yours if we are just going to consider this like normmal utilitarian folks #UnCancel #Please #
No dice! Bye!
What are you on about!!
My bro tavros always knows what to say when a man is down and out granted it takes him a whole helluva lot longer to say it than the average bear on accounting of his vernacular and fry on his verbiage but thats all fine and dandy.
Unfortunately, I was unable to participate in last night's festivities. I PERSONALLY made the perilous journey to a secure Crockercorp underground bunker to secure the requisite implement for tonight. ... Unlike our previous events, we invite ONLY the courageous select few among you to journey deep within yourselves. This will be a night of communion to forces with which you are all yet unawares. Access to a relic of the time before the Creators. Welcome to #eridanweek Night Five. How's the state of your sweet tooth? Confirm your attendance with #IWANTCANDY on the timeline. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/043f8154d007.png
Miss Crocker...What is that thing? It makes me a touch uneasy.
READ ALL ABOUT IT β [ Huh... ]
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DoΒ£s this likΒ£, comΒ£ with a comical likΒ£, propΒ£llΒ£r hat? ;P
Five Nights at Eridan Week? #eridanweek #fnaew
:33 < does your event have more grubburgers? :33 < if given the choice betw33n candy and meat... :33 < well i like sw33ts but gimme the meat any day!
oh. that looks yummy!
Okay now i know anyone who shows up to this is stupid
A formal statement on the events of last night's MARVUS XOLOTO performance. It is my sincerest regret that our star performer was not able to enchant you all with the musical stylings of his newest single #BIGFATA$$. However, it seems the arrival of some additional bad actors, in a desperate plea NOT to change the ideologies of the people, but merely to gain my attention, detonated an explosive in the arena shortly after the announcement of the night's closing performance. UNFORTUNATELY, the sheer quantity of oil sprayed amongst the arena and crowds acted as an accelerator. Crockercorp pledges to utilize a water-based lubricant for all future events featuring two men in skimpy shorts slamming one another before a roaring crowd. Anyway. Reanimations and mass healings have taken place throughout the evening and are now completed. Thank you all for attending. Announcement for this evening's festivities are to come shortly. #eridanweek #bombing #oiledup #badcombo
The whole she*BANG* (get it) with the oil and the bomb had this joint smelling like a couple of hot kebabs.
And kind of like an olive garden.
Yes, the odor was wretched.
Truly disheartening that fools would try to ruin Crockercorp's hard work at #Eridanweek out of jealousy and spite. Pathetic. But Crockercorp will rise above.
You're welcome.
Im not going to lie my busted chops still ache something fierce from the doublefisted beatdown i received last night. Egads! Who knew a lady so prone to busting her spigot had a wind up like that.
:33 < Nevfurr forget, paddles are heavy! Mew have to imagine the purrength that must go into carrying it around everyday! Mew should've s33n it coming, I say.
Guh...
:33 < Ill have my peopurr send for an official Beforian Times ice bag for mewre keister! Worry not, Mistpurr English~
Be there or be square! At #eridanweek! https://msparp.chat/eridanwweek https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/35f8069316fd.gif
FUCK Y0UR M4RK3T1NG T34M 1S F1R3
:33 < LIVE NEWS COVERAGE! Join us LIVE at the ringside of #rumblenight when THREE TITANS CLASH!!! Be sure to follow @beforianTimes to get ALL the hottest coverage where NOTHING WILL GO WRONG!! I mewself will be purrsonally commentating over the event along with the other casters. We hope to s33 mew there! #eridanw33k https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/92250a533eae.png
Im prepping my ittiest briefs for the show! Dont forget to #oilup and turn out for the throw down of the CENTURY. The impervious hero jake english stakes his claim into two ruffian cads... the infamous heel dirk strider himself guards the corner and swings from the ropes... will eridan ampora prove to be friend foe or something far more dastardly?? Set the station and shake the static from your boobtube! All will be revealed AND MORE at #eridanweek!
What the heck man.
Aw dont razz my good pal eridan hes the top of the class in terms of expert dudery and rock hard fellas.
If you are so opposed to him you ought to tune in to me pounding him! Im going to beat that sucker to smitherines.
Be first in line for that cads butt whooping and youll get a full frontal view of the action my good man. π«π«;)
Bro youre obsessed.
I hope you're all prepared for #RUMBLENIGHT as we bring the Pumpkin Patch @golgothasTerror @timaeusTestified#0414 to #ERIDANWEEK ! Marvus Xoloto @clownBae will be performing his hit new single #BIGFATA$$ BY MARV && PROD DJ FODDER LIVE. #bigfatass LISTEN NOW. ------------ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SsqOFk_0z0 ------------ LISTEN NOW. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/4e0e870631ef.PNG
X Hold on is there gonna be a fight at eridan night x
One to titillate your senses. Slake your thirst for blood. And also oil. I've been told there will be a lot of #oilingup .
Be there. No sign up, no credit card, no bullshit. #oilingup
I have been postitutely bumping the latest release from the king of clownery himself! @clownBae s latest tune has got me jiving like a mad cat on a hot tin roof. The backing track of #rumblenight itself be sure to tune your stereoviews to #eridanweek s very own THRICE OILED RUMBLETHON!! https://youtu.be/6SsqOFk_0z0?si=lsHrniMKWo_Aj6LV
if ur at #eridanweek u bettr li$$ten to #BIGFATA$$ ft troll bhad grubbie xo) πΆπ€π§ https://youtu.be/6SsqOFk_0z0?si=lsHrniMKWo_Aj6LV π§π€πΆ https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/363009cce4d7.jpeg
:33 < i dont think im allowed to stream this but i support your mewsical endeavors!! #indiemewsic #bigfata
MAKE HIS RECORD PLATINUM!!!
#BIGFATA$$ privat viewing pawty was a sma$$h HIT ! cummin 2 da publix tmw xo) on chit && trolltube keep ya peeperz out && GIT REDDY 2 SLAM
THE STAGE WILL BE ALIGHT WITH YOUR SICK FIRE!!!
&& yez u will b able 2 listen 2 a reel acktual song i made forreel called #BIGFATA$$ nvr4gtit
Happy STUPID #wizardwednesday at #eridanweek. I am reluctantly participating in the costume theming of the evening at the behest of @tipsyGnostalgic#2248 This hat makes me look like a gnome. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/e3ef4ea1b9df.png
DISRESPECTFULLY?
Your content isn't fit to house the manure, let alone root the crops.
my thoughts are a jumble of wwonder and awwe the only thing i can think to say in reply is alakazam
My fucking WHAT?
First the fanfiction and now this? - MC Oleana
w0rth the wait.
>([we t#e only motion in t#is ocean and some of yall wanna go back to land fr]
I sure do love going around corners unguarded and unprepared for any sort of potential creamy projectile from an unsuspected prankstress!
bE CAREFUL jAKE, iT SOUNDS LIKE YOU ARE SETTING YOURSELF UP FOR A, cREAM PIE, iNSTANT LOSS, tYPE, sCENARIO, iT CAN HAPPEN, tO ANY, oF US,
You wont believe what happens next.
Its like ive been reduced to being flat on my hiney! Legs akimbo and my mind totally scrambled...
Why is everyone feeling somber and dread at the handwich stand. :( #eridanweek
Batten the hatches and prep your bling! The world isnt ready to gander your official skaianet sponsored #eridanweek SWWAG (super wowing wearable authorized garments) as you tear through the crowds and turn up to your favorite transdimensional trollian artists! The fun isnt over when the festivities conclude keep donning your duds and swinging from the rafters in these funky tees commemorating ERIDAY1. Ordering online?? Use coupon code RUMBLETHURS10 for 10% off your purchase! For 10% off of physical retailers unload your ammunition into one of our handy rounds disposal jars and keep on keeping on as you rejoin the frisk of this kittyfray. (All proceeds from troll bruno mars commemorative tees will be donated to his inevitable psychological treatment.) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/20ff77af8399.gif
I wouldnt deprive a lady of her ability to self market bro its the 21st century thats just archaic.
Let your freak flag fly as they say.
Whore you.
Jeepers creepers someone let this hen out of the roosters nest.
Skaianet will now be selling novelty tees to commemorate #eridanweek night one! If youre hankering for a little swag in your duds kindly shoot me a howdy do and well make magic happen.
hOW CAN i, gET IN ON THIS?