Eridan Ampora
@caligulaAscendit
sensitivve young man | classicist | hopeless romantic | philosopher | radical indivvidual | sophisticated intellectual | paragon a poetic grace | heartthrob a vvibrant young wwomen
as codified by statute 34 section twwo male citizens a the maritime republic a the great fincel revvolution must undergo mandatory bulge checks to ensure that all male citizens havve fair access to the female population as an anti macrophallism measure due to missin out on key devvelopmental an romantic milestones fincels wwith bulges rangin from micro to just beloww avverage wwill be guaranteed a female 8-10 thus bulge size is commensurate to a wwomans attractivveness on the flip side gigachads wwith macrophalluses are civvilly barred admission to any wwoman abovve a twwo failure to abide by this immutable laww wwill result in bein publicly drawwn through the streets by a hoofbeast an subsequently dismembered in the spirit a superior greco roman tradition to wwhich the maritime republic a the great fincel revvolution owwes its roots long livve urbs roma male lovvin (or hatin) male relationships are bound to similar albeit disparate strictures such bein that the man wwith the larger bulge is the civilly designated receivver #nsfww #gore #maritimerepublicathegreatfincelrevvolution
duty calls an by that i mean the privvy more on my proposal for a neww chittr later #makechittrgreatagain
J⟡J⟡--> Y⟡u need ⚓︎⟡ #m♡kepissg♡⚓︎egre♡⚓︎♡g♡in ins⚓︎e♡d.. <--J⟡J⟡ ⟡U⚓︎
I dunno. I t)(ink t)(is place is great!
this platform needs a more unflinchin approach howw much to purchase chittr
i wwas gonna ban all the wwomen except for the ones that are nice to me an youre not bein vvery nice right noww so i guess that solvves that
"= from my knowledge the owner is unstoppably stubborn. no caegar could do it. just buy chittr gold and call it a night. and uh, your 'coinstuffer'? ="
wwent to the buyblock not only is it filled wwith lowwbloods but they got the bloody egg lepus here oh great alternian empire bestoww me the strength not to smoke him in front a all these grubs
You want to kill him so bad it makes you look stupid.
wwhat do you mean theres been a flash crash wwhat the fuck am i supposed to do wwith all these ericoin quarter zips
fef you need to invvest before its too late eridancoin hasnt evven been out for 24 hours this is the fastest crash the cryptomarket has seen since useless ethereum token
You've GOT to be joking! Before I invest in ANYT)(ING I need to )(ire Terezi to look over t)(e details of any agreement I mig)(t be attac)(ing my name to.
As muc)( as I try to be --ENCOURAGING of your )(obbies, you know t)(at I )(ave to be t)(e S--ENSIBUBBL--E one of us bot)(.
exactly eri plus they havve a cool little eridancoin embroidery on them classy but functional
wwith a fuschia backin eridancoin wwe wwill most certainly see a turnaround youre bein unreasonable here
Give me exactly one GOOD logical reason I s)(ould put my influence as an )(eiress be)(ind a multiversal united front of ent)(usiastically misguided Amporas. 38P
anyone wwant to be the troll grimes to my troll elon musk
shit. is it t00 late t0 take that back and say the real answer is b0nnie bluebl00d?
stop bein poor also i offered to send caegars but you need to subscribe to my substack first
:33 < sorry, i live in a cave and i have to hunt my food to survive!! im not purrivileged like other trolls >:// >:// < pawlso no!!! im fine
imagine me 0n my knees, kissing y0ur steel-t0ed b00ts, panting in desperati0n at the chance 0f earning even the tiniest sniff 0f y0ur c0caine. #substance
i like the attention to detail particularly the part about my boots an your mouth but its missin a narrative again from the top pissblood
what else d0 y0u want me t0 d0, call myself a burnt 0ut gutterbl00d wast0id and lick the gunk fr0m under y0ur heels? want me t0 sl0b 0n y0ur kn0b while i'm at it? this is stupid fuck 0ff and g0 t0 hell.
i mean i'd pr0bably d0 it th0ugh. n0t sl0bbing y0ur kn0b but the rest 0f it. if y0u changed y0ur mind.
catchin strays but you knoww these bitches wwould be makin excuses to get in my ovverpriced pantaloons despite the allegations if i wwere a chadlite
♰ insufferable ♰
(•́⍜•̀)🎪 WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
♰ at least im not some self-aggrandizing prick who has to filter sea water through my gills just to make it through the day. :) ♰
// I promised myself I wouldnt ooc post but I want to share art of my fincel. I hope you guys have been (hating) eri. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c33318e4224d.jpg
SECRETARIES ARE AWESOME, I OWN HER, HIT HER, KISS HER, HONESTLY I MIGHT GIVE HER A RAISE
another richy banger
you might be my favvorite chittr account honestly
THANKS, FINALLY SOMEONE APPRECIATES MY PERFECT CHITTS INSTEAD OF BLOCKING ME
♰ whats your address? ♰
this is unacceptable the haters cannot handle your profound wwisdom
DR LIVISBURG 2589, YOU WILL PROBABLY COME TRY TO KILL ME BUT LIKE DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY IG
the real reason i killed all the lowwaa angels is cause they reminded me a cosplayers an i wwas tryin to generate enough embarrassment points to get them to stop
BOLD WORDS FROM 4 GUY WHOS3 1CON H4S POT3NT NOT3S OF G33K1SM
trollbama is a misandrist wwhod havve thought this is wwhy i alwways vvote aquaist #wwoke #traditionilist #hemoorthodoxy
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lowkey thought you were metrosexual with that scarf dude
my bisexuality is not a marker for my particular sexual predilictions i do not lean back in my chair an sigh in elation from escapin the self discovvery gambit my bisexuality is a tool a cold hard tool maybe like a wwrench or somethin i dont knoww for fillin my quads because a wwider net guarantees more fish wwhy is evveryone so fuckin wweird about the bloody scarf scarvves are a perfectly ubiquitous accessory wwholly unremarkable an wworn by more than half the population a any planet wwith a temperate climate my scarf is comfortable an it keeps my gills wwarm it aint that fuckin deep frankly i think havvin a pair a cunty little bird wwings is far more indicativve a metrosexuality but also i might be meterosexual
my bird wings arent little and theyre majestic as fuck and any time i show up to the spot i got bitches always asking omg can we preen your feathers also im lesbian but i respect you owning up to being bisexual major kudos
alright youvve officially lost me youre either wwindin me up on purpose or youvve spent so long trapped as a sprite that youre experiencin some kind a crisis i thought you wwere a boy
yea so did i times change man just like gender
yea she/they
eridan ampora the real hero a chittr
no luck in my pursuit a the peanut i havve cruised oceans plural an criminally crossed intergalactic borders an still there is no trace a the legume beast i am currently ensconced in a tree wwith my penultimate rifle wwhile the savvage denizens a the foreign sleazehole i find myself attempt to gently persuade me to alight wwith swweet fruit these damn freebooters must possess a preternatural ability for sensin hunger fortunately i am a carnivvore because consumin flesh adds to my musky powwah an allegedly revverses hair loss
just shot a grub i think oh wwell
I GET HAPPY WHEN I HIT MY SECRETARY
sOUnds like a job i wOUldnt wAnnA kEEp. a tEmporAry pOsitiOn if AnythIng.
brb im on the wwarpath cause ivve had enough a that impertinent peanut im huntin him dowwn an puttin an ahab sized hole betwwixt his eyes
-2 hella jeffs
WHY?? 1 TH1NK H3 1S 4CTU4LLY QU1T3 CH4RM1NG 4ND 3NGROSS1NGLY MYST3R1OUS!
OF COURS3 YOU DONT UND3RST4ND TH3 4PP34L OF 4 GUY WHO C4N SHUT TH3 FUCK UP >:]
if you wwanted to form a death squad you just had to say so
mods i need group chats so that me an the twwo alts i like an caliborn an richy can havve our owwn space awway from the normies an the lowwbloods this wway i nevver havve to interact wwith the tl again might invvite a single girl though so she can send tasteful nudies on request
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Lik£, y£t again horrific post! Lik£, no on£ is doing it lik£, as t£rribly as you. <3
</3: Https://i,,,imgflip,,,com/8z1efp,,,png?a492624
Lik£, no probl£m man. Gotta giv£ you lik£, a pat on th£ back or som£thing. LMAO
FINALLY. A FELLOW ALPHA MALE WHO GETS IT.
the eridanosphere #maritimerepublicathegreatfincelrevvolution
indelible characteristics a bein poor knowwin howw to tie your shoelaces
WHAT THE FUCK IS A SHOE LACE.
if you dont knoww wwhat a shoelace youre not wwise enough to interact wwith me
its cause poors are a restless bunch like livvin tools they long to be a use
dont care i am occupied makin the floor plan for my neww amphitheater wwe are bringin back wwarrior masculinity #maritimerepublicathegreatfincelrevvolution
wwe need an eridan button howw much do you think the greedy caegar grubbin mods wwill concede to
plus 2 eridans
the amp0ras are c0nsistently the funniest pe0ple 0n chittr with0ut even trying and that's unf0rtunate.
natural charisma
i get so excited when they post and i can reply with something about poop
D --> Liking this solely so that you get more kults
\/\/\/\/hat d'ye mean b'this, y'fuckin' scoundrel?
ok landlubber you can havve a followw for this one
There is an idea of a Dirk Strider, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable: I simply am not there. It is hard for me to make sense on any given level. Myself is fabricated, an aberration. I am a noncontingent human being. My personality is sketchy and unformed, my heartlessness goes deep and is persistent. My conscience, my pity, my hopes disappeared a long time ago (probably on Earth C) if they ever did exist. There are no more barriers to cross. All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it, I have now surpassed. I still, though, hold on to one single bleak truth: no one is safe, nothing is redeemed. Yet I am blameless. Each model of human behavior must be assumed to have some validity. Is evil something you are? Or is it something you do? #Foodforthought #Yourewelcome #Drinkdeepthedregs #Daddyishome
alternian psycho one of my favvorites hes just like me
Where id is, there shall ego be.
I don’t mean to be mean but why did you end your clearly deeply philosophical exposition with the phrase Daddy’s Home. What do you mean by that. Also I think it might help you feel better if you took a nap.
My father who art on Deltrius, hallow be thy shades, thy kingdom hath come, but thy art not done spouting menial bullshit on main? Don’t you have a narrative to dip your well-manicured phalanges into, subjects in which you must stir and rattle their brain cortexes into disrepair? #Yourlaunderingisat95%completion #Correction #Processing #96.8567557%
congratulations wwhen the maritime republic a the fincel revvolution is established you wwill be spared
Dirk it seems you are attracting quite the unsavory following of men who get no motion and can’t get laid. What are your thoughts on how this audience reflects on you?
All I can do is hope that they eventually come to understand their full potential. #MaybeIshouldstartapodcast