Ritchy Keldam
@croesusKingpin
[PROUD OWNER OF KELDAM CORP. #EO AND INVE$TOR!] [HE/HIM]
[I REMEMBER WHEN MY AN#E$TOR E$KARY KELDAM WA$ PA$$ING ↓ THE #OMPANIE$ PERMIT$ AND ALL THAT $MART$Y PEOPLE $TUFF (BEFORE HI$ PA$$ING OF #OUR$E) HE PUT HI$ BIG A$$ HAND ON MY LITTLE $HOULDER AND TOLD ME "DO NOT FU#K THI$ ↑, RIT#HY." WHI#H I REMEMBERED JU$T NOW BE#AU$E IM U$ING MY #OMPANY #REDIT #ARD TO BUY A MILK$HAKE NOT THAT IT MATTER$ THOUGH A$ I AM RI#H]
I am so happy for you, I am going to light another cigarette in your name after reading this. #substances
.png)
What lik£, flavour. LOL. ;P
[$TRAWBERRY ((OO# IVE NEVER HAD A MILK$HAKE LIKE THAT BEFORE IDK WHAT FLAVOUR$ THEY #OME IN I JU$T A$$UMED IT$ MO$TLY DIARIE AND LIKE MILK))]
[WELL IM FLATTERED BUT THAT MANY #IGARETTE$ #ANNOT BE HEALTHY FOR YOU..VAPE IN$TEAD MY #OMPANY OFFER$ DIFFERENT DI$TRIBUTED FLAVOUR$ AND A $UB$#RIPTION BA$ED PUR#HA$E OF A VAPE WITH A $#REEN ON IT THAT TELL$ HOW MANY HOUR$ UNTIL YOU DIE OF LUNG #AN#ER I$NT THAT NEAT]
[WHAT THE HELL I$ GOING ON AT #ERIDANWEEK IM TOO BU$Y WITH A#TUAL WORKLOAD AND EMPLOYMENT TO GO]
I need to immortalize this someψhere. https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/311431599445245952/1489741179091423374/image.png?ex=69d18517&is=69d03397&hm=3beada55d7f2e33939cfca5ea884cdbe21a207300c3dd0cb46f794bd0f3d275f&
That thing is smaller than the life-line mark on the palm.
It's so tiny. I love it so much. it's almost smaller than the hook
↘️it is a literal honor to have made someone of such status and rapport and also superiority happy.↘️ ↗️THIS IS A WIN.↗️
Not 8eginning to point out how enhanced the degree of magnific8tion is used to photograph it.
I have never seen a smaller fish, I'm more impressed he caught exactly just that one.
|| ritchy is a reused concept i had eons ago when i was still into homestuck, a teal businessman that wanted nothing but to expand his corporations domain..i should have a picture of him somewhere but its probably lost by now
|| he had the stupidest fucking haircut ever that hair of yours is absurd he had the josuke higashikata back hair lighting things before i knew jjba was a thing guess it was always meant to be or something
[@BENIGNANTAPPERTAIN OKAY WHATEVER YOU #AN HAVE YOUR IHU$K 17 JU$T DON'T $AY ANYTHING ABOUT THI$ AGAIN OKAY I #AN ALREADY FEEL THE $PON$OR$ #O#KING THEIR EYEBROW$]
📧 -> Is This Kind Of Behavior And Etiquette Normal At Keldam Corp? Best, Kelric Stravi
=>>yeah! He caMe in øne day and støle all øur chøcøMilk bøxes that was a pretty søMber day, then anøther day he kept bøthering the Marketing teaM abøut Making a prøMøtiønal iMage øf his petting a little barkbeast with flaMes in the backgrøund and there was øne day when he støle My lunch Møney and called Me a lusus then there was øne day where he tøøk us øn a field trip gøt løst and we had tø gø get hiM at the pølice statiøn and he was full øf Mud!>>>
A simple portrait of my face. (=)ttps://cdn.discordapp.com/attac(=)ments/311431599445245952/1489727972146413608/lumdir_bust.png?ex=69d178ca&is=69d0274a&(=)m=bc7f01c01218272266163cd812cc722c45c7f5fd728c394c0bc2b04b0b13d7b3&
~do you have any idea hovv gorgeous you are
I suppose not, (=)a(=)a. I do (=)ave to look at t(=)is face every nig(=)t, so you get used to it.
[EVERYONE GIVE A VERY BIG FU#KING #LAP TO @BENIGNANTAPPERTAIN BE#AU$E THE WHOLE OFFI#E KNOW$ NOW! THANK$ A LOT HUR$U$...]
no it’s okay buddy i suspected it over the sweeps we’ve all been their with our workers just don’t let hr hear can’t protect you from this one, ol’ boy
[I AM NOT HAVING A RELATION$HIP WITH MY EMPLOYEE OUT$IDE OF THE WORKPLA#E THAT WA$ JU$T A ONE OFF THING AND NEVER AGAIN I DOUBT HR #ARE$]
[I HAVE WORKED IT OUT WITH HIM ALREADY JU$T FU#K JU$T DON'T TELL MY AN#E$TOR$ GRAVE$TONE]
↗️ANOTHER OPPORTUNITY FOR AN "OFFICE GETAWAY" AND "GORECATION PACKAGE".↗️ ↘️of course, my worksquare neighbor of vastly inferior taste and also weak hand strength took the opportunity to vacate his position and use his↘️ ↗️"PTO"↗️ ↘️which is a silly and frivolous concept for trolls with no dedication or obligation or passion to serve.↘️ ↗️BUT I KNOW.↗️ ↘️this is simply a trap and also a trick.↘️ ↗️AND I WILL NEVER FALL FOR IT.↗️ ↘️upper manglement is attempting to test my will and my resolve and my dedication.↘️ ↗️NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I WILL STAY RIGHT HERE.↗️
may i ask you a question? another after thys one i mean, hehe.
why would pto be a trap? i am aware that there are some logistycal differences between our societies so i am tryyng to understand the impulse to classify pto as such. thanks for lettyng me ask!
↗️THEY ARE CLEARLY ATTEMPTING TO WEED OUT THE LESSER DEVOTED AND INFERIOR EMPLOYEES.↗️ ↘️you want to step away from your worksquare? you want to "go away" and "see your lusus"?↘️ ↗️FIND A DIFFERENT JOB.↗️
ohhh i see! interestyng. that sounds stressful, but clearly you have thyngs well in claw.
[I FEEL DI$RE$PE#TED ILL BE TALKING ABOUT THI$ TO MY LAWYER$ @BENIGNANTAPPERTAIN]
[THAT I$ NOT ME GUY$ DON'T BELIEVE ANYTHING YOU $EE ON THE INTERNET]
|| im bored and need some stupid funny images to draw ritchy over does anyone have any? Or like can anyone tell me what the key words for it are on pinterest or something?
(( https://i.pinimg.com/736x/36/54/84/36548442972e739897495fa971597aab.jpg MAYBE? idek how i find pictures i have a whole pin board for dumb stuff
[WHAT I$ THI$ #ERIDANWEEK NON$EN$E! WHY #AN'T WE HAVE A ##ORPORATEWEEK WHERE EVERYONE GOE$ TO WORK?!]
honestly, that would be one of the very few things that would make me wish i were at Eridan Week instead.
✿ oh okay dis is news to me i thought ties made u #profresh well i guess ill put down the drumstickz SIKE!!!! YOU WILL NEVA GET IN OFFICE!!!!!!!
i forgot how much unemployment sucks / i need a job /
>>| wait, what .about .a singing career?
i don't like having a job / but i don't like not having a job more
i don't actually make that much / everything i make off music goes back into my music carrier / that's just kinda how it is in the music industry
📧 -> I’m Probably Nonbinary But I Have A Job So I Don't Really Care About That Right Now. Cheers, Kelric Stravi
↗️DON'T MAKE A POST LOOKING FOR A JOB AND THEN TURN UP YOUR SNIFF CANALS AT THE OPPORTUNITY FOR LABOR.↗️ ↘️do not be a beggar and also a chooser. choose to be employed outside of your field if you must.↘️
📧 -> Per My Last Message, I Work Where And With Whomever I Have The Freedom To Choose From. I Don't See Anything Wrong With Casting A Wide Net And Throwing Back What I'm Uninterested In. Have The Night You Deserve, Kelric Stravi
↗️PER MY CURRENT MESSAGE, I AM NOTICING A STARK LACK OF WORK ETHIC AND ALSO A COMPLETE AND TOTAL INABILITY TO ASCEND TO THE "AND OTHER TASKS AS DESIGNATED" PARTS OF THE AVERAGE JOB APPLICATION.↗️ ↘️i am working shifts you cannot even fathom.↘️ ↗️INSINCERELY,↗️ ↘️wrothe aiaray.↘️
[OF #OUR$E YOU A$K AND I $HALL RE$POND! THI$ I$ HOW THING$ ARE DONE IN THE TRUE MAN$ WORLD! AL$O THAT #HIPOTLE WA$ GOOD BUT I FOUND A HAIR IN MY #HI#KEN..]
https://fILE .gardEn/aPO8brGC2g82JIEr/ImagEn_2026-04-03_181606806 .png
[IM TIRED OF $EEING PEOPLE HORNYPO$TING LET$ $TART #BIG$HOTPO$TING IN$TEAD GIVE ME YOUR BE$T PRODU#T OFFER AND MAYBE ILL #ON$IDER HIRING YOU FOR #ORPORATE!]
yes, hello, iii would liiike to propose a product. today iii am presentiiing to you my iiidea for a restraiiint table that does not buckle under the weiiight of a siiingle dehydrated lowblood and a tiiick lusus engorged wiiith theiiir delectable juiiices, but nonetheless stiiill requiiires assembly so as to make for compelliiing and subscriiibe worthy content.
[I LIKE IT! HOW MU#H MONEY DO YOU THINK THE MAKING OF THI$ PRODU#T WOULD #O$T (REMEMBER THE MORE MI#ROPLA$TI# IT #AN #ONTAIN THE BETTER!)]
iii beliiieve that iiit should be produced for a meager 6000 boondollars. enough to maiiintaiiin a certaiiin feeliiing of old school class and exclusiiion but not so much that the engiiineers are not iiincentiiiviiized to pump iiit as full of plastiiics (miiicro or otherwiiise, as all plastiiics wiiill eventually once agaiiin succumb to dust)
(( diiid you know: voiiice actiiing Ardata for the now nonexiiistent oriiigiiinal friiiendsiiim fandub transed my goddamn gender? IIIt's true! III understand her on a spiiiriiitual level and III am goiiing to make iiit everyone's problem
(( I forgot to mark this ooc to deauirk it but given the context of the statement I'm gonna claim it was intentional
[NOW THAT$ THE $PIRIT! ILL BE $EEING YOU IN MY OFFI#E BY NEXT WEEK!]
[WHOEVER IMPLIE$ I U$ED TO BE BU$INE$$ PARTNER$ WITH THEM IT$ GETTING $UED IM ALREADY TALKING TO MY LAWYER$ ABOUT THI$!!!!]
its okay man take every step you need in these trying times