dave 🍎
@turntableGodhead
mun is 21, muse is 18 // he/him // no sburb au profile and post art is all by me @broStrider#9635 is my goat
yo send me shit on my bros website and i might see it just dont flash me or youre getting put on some kind of shame wall https://plushrrump.straw.page/qna
some people are so dumb it makes me wonder if theyve ever used their brain before i can say some obvious sarcastic bullshit that no one could possibly take seriously and youve got at least one genius coming in to reply in full sincerity like no numb nuts i dont eat dirt for the nutrients but im sure you would
Next of kin I am disheveled 😂😂😂😂.
told him i was taking a picture and he did whatever the fuck this is https://i.postimg.cc/PJZkJCwd/smile-for-da-gram.png
he looks like jim carrie's the mask
yr bro looks like the dad from fnf
holy shit this is prolly the first time i see that guy smilin
HE'S GRIPPIN YOU 😭 FOR WHAT PURPOSE
he has a habit of grabbing me with as much force as possible but i think he just has a really strong arm
im not coping before anyone says anything because i know people love sticking their noses into things that dont involve them im fine and everything has been and always will be fine end of story
need some kind of rule set in place to forget everything said in this time frame so i dont get my teeth knocked out for saying stupid shit that isnt even true
cuz like obviously its all a joke im cool with whatever happens and id do something about it if i wasnt but its also not even bad like were just fucking around no one understands irony anymore
nah like a rule so you cant do it after you get better all just jokes all in good fun man nobody believes the poorly constructed pleas for help anyways and if they do then theyre just falling for the troll
I don't know if I can keep pitying your posts, Dave. It would be easier if you weren't being so pitiful. I'll continue to refresh your homosexually inclined man-blog and gently weep into a rag for now. The humanity.
oh yeah im the most pitiful man alive if i were in a wimp-off competition with michael cera and tom holland i would for sure come out as the winner and champion of all wimpkind
please god if youre real and you love me let this be a wake up call for him to give up the violent grind
i want to say something but im worried my condition will worsen via your prayer.
i guess you gotta start being super nice to me or youll never get better
getting up on my tiptoes like a ballerina and spinning around after getting a microdose of validation and appreciation
youre actively trying to cough on my face and get me sick i think i have the right to be screaming for help
holy shit the wait is over goodnight chittr im gonna go pass out with bro like separately but at the same time whatever you know what i mean
i would totally go crash in bed already but bro wont let me and i really dont wanna be a wimp and disappoint him all worth it in the end i guess cant get strong if 16 hours without sleep is what does me in
not to sound like a baby but im so tired and i really wanna nap my bed is calling out to me like a siren
getting an actual good song and game recommendation in one thing? motherfucking jackpot https://i.postimg.cc/3Rp3kcMS/image.png
yo send me shit on my bros website and i might see it just dont flash me or youre getting put on some kind of shame wall https://plushrrump.straw.page/qna
thanks for asking me beforehand, dave. i really appreciate you inquiring if you were allowed to use my website for your own personal shit before doing so.
oh come on we basically co-own the thing with how much of me is on there
all i want all i fucking want is a rolly rolly rolly with a dab of ranch
and YES i’ve already got some designer to hold up my pants
>we have grubflakes can you be fucking NORMAL >but also >if you do find some >let me have one lol
this is the most relatable thing on the whole platform i cried a bit from how beautiful this was
need to burn a mental image from my mind somehow
I can help
bro got me nachos for lunch its kinda past lunch time but its cool shits delicious so i cant be mad at all
yeah, you should take down the post about me not buying groceries now. or at least get a more flattering photo of me.
okay well that post is hilarious so no but yeah i can take a new one just dont do anything weird so i can actually post it
how do i delete someone elses profile and also erase their memory of my profile and also not get my ass kicked again
first yöu götta hack intö the mainframe then yöu hit them ön the head with a frying pan until theyre pröperly cöncussed sö höpefully they förget whö they are andnwönt beat yöu up
For the former, probably just spam them with false reports until the moderators get tired and either ban you, them, or both of you. For the second, just make a new account, dawg.
ok well how do i go about the ass kicking thing? do i lunge out of a window and hope he doesnt follow me? hes like right outside the door man
if yöi try hard enöugh anything can wörk! i wöuld gö with the chair thöugh
Stand your ground and reverse the ass kicking scenario or just jump out of the window, yeah. As a bonus for the latter, you'll get to look really badass so long as you don't crack your skull on the pavement and die.
gööd luck and gödspeed bröther 🫡
just a heads up i will be posting more pictures of the back of your head @broStrider#9635
:33 < purress the heart button, it means mew wanna tear his heart out
:33 < i'm a sw33t kitty i am nefur dispawnest
oh come on its not that serious man you know im just fuckin with you B(
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꒰welcome to burger king sorry its all so fucking hopeless꒱
Unreal Heiress, make these guys super straight and virtuous.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/733fd833af56.png
PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR PHONE. OR GIVE ME A CALL. I CANNOT SUPPORT THIS. I KNOW THIS IS NOT YOUR HEART.