Bro Strider
@temperedTragedian
CEO of Smuppup, Fabricator of sweet rhymes, and Your Mother's suitor. (all pictures and all art are my own)
what's all this fatherly talk about? my son's a perfect dude, everything about him is awesome. you couldn't ask for a better fucking son.
why is every version of me on here a quirked up sex pervert!? this is SO not cash money! we egberts need to protect our brand! we can't be unassuming and lame if we get laid. #nsfw #notcool #ifidontgetanythenYOUdontgetany
Maybe you should get on their level.
this is NOT a lame take! it's actually a very BASED take, i'll have you know. i'm having my reputation smeared!
their level is on a whole different plane! i’m staying right where i’m at, in my own john egbert–specific tier. no sex, no weird innuendos! just bad movies and the occasional zinger!
I Agree Entirely. In Fact I Think There Should Be A Hashtag To Celebrate John's Who Don't " Get Any ". #incelbert
woah, woah! hold on! this is straight-up character assassination! i appreciate the finer, carnal things. it’s just, y’know… i’m not weird about it! absolutely not incel behavior! if anything, trimming it down to #celbert feels way more accurate. :B but honestly, i don’t even think i should be stuck with the suffix at all!
every dave on my chittr is a degenerate! which isn't even that far from the reality of it. still! grahhh!
yall trollbama announced michelle was fucking dead at #eridanweek man's be hiding shit, i just fucking know it.
yall are so whipped by the government letting @barackObama deny you your right to yaoi and yuri. we gotta fucking set up a mass protest! https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/2ae02b108acb.jpg
Sir. I am not banning the Yaoi or the Yuri. I am merely stating I am no longer allowed to interact with such content. However, I appreciate your dedication to your morals and fighting for what you believe is right. That is the true foundation of democracy!
you think you're safe and then the first thing you read on this god forsaken platform is the president wanting to forcefully put you in therapy. no one's safe.
jesus fucking mary joseph christ in a mother fucking handbasket.
I shall incorporate that into my belief system posthaste.
you better start believing. shits gearing up for a full blown apocalypse and you're out here blasphemizing.
you know shits rough when you catch your personal fed on social media.
yall don't know what it's like being a #boydad with all these fucking nightmares walking in plain daylight.
Boydad but all of my "boys" are half-sentient vehicles that backseat drive constantly and start calling me rude names when I don't stop to fill up the gas tank frequently enough.
the feds are crawling out of the woodwork. they don't know i've got their number.
Hellx user temperedTragedian!!! #Rechit!!! Xr wait there is a rechit buttxn nxw I will press that!!!
they're in your walls and you're too focused on social media to witness it.
YOU WON'T PUT ME UNDER MOTHER FUCKER I'VE GOT THE WHEREWITHAL TO WITHSTAND INTENSE TORTURE.
you're letting them in by entertaining doubt, little man. get your eyes holes a peeping.
despair is the first sign they've got you hooked in their web of torture.
B33 < damn how early do people in your web of torture despair dude B33 < s33ms like they might be purredisposed to despairing if thats the FURST SIGN
wasn't talking about me. you're just too mainstream loser slop to get it.
carbon-based lifeforms implies the existence of carbon-cringe lifeforms.
You hate me.
acceptable.
B33 < this ones good actually sorry rose
nah wait let him keep talking he might be onto something here
Don't encourage him.
throwing tomatoes.
I enjoyed this one.
pro tip don't let them see you blink. they'll collect your soul when you're blissfully unaware.
yeah man they've been sticking their noses where they don't belong and stealing up all my sunshine.
i love being a #boydad my boy has an understanding with me, we crank out jams on the daily.
Troogle what is a 'dad'.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE A 'BRO'?
not how it works
it don't matter, you're hot, and i like our little love rutting. #nsfw
sounds like someone needs some more top from the big top. ;o) #nsfw
yes, obviously. i'm always in the market for being a bottom bitch to a hot motherfucker like you. #nsfw
what's all this fatherly talk about? my son's a perfect dude, everything about him is awesome. you couldn't ask for a better fucking son.
alright, i got my new script in the mail. you fucking happy. @barackObama
I am, I hope you begin feeling positive effects soon.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/eefe1de20b6e.png
it's me again. they're using radio waves to control the weather. and if you weren't aware those fucking chemtrails in the sky aren't condensation, they're fucking chemicals to control your pliable brains.
not how radio wa𝑣es work but okay
S♡♡♡♡ n♡t h♡w radi♡s w♡rk! </3 ᯓ★ˎˊ˗
I genuinely don't know how to respond to that... Seek therapy?
okay grandpa its time for bed
the moon is an artificial alien construct space ship sent here by the el-aurians to observe our fucking planet. it's fucking fake, we live on a goddamn torodial earth, so it must have its own engines because it wouldn't be able to naturally orbit the torodial earth.
Hellx reputable sxurce temperedTragedian!!! Just fxr frame xf reference yxu're speaking xf Human-planet's mxxn...???
@barackObama got nothing to say about this one, HUH?
Perfect!!! Thank yxu sx much my gxxd Gentlehuman!!! :))) I'll have tx ask yxu mxre abxut el-aurians anxther time.........
yall dont understand, peanut is legit my best friend. we eat lunch together weekly.
yall think the titanic really sunk but it most definitely was it's sister ship, olympic. those bitches sunk it for the insurance money.
I’ll actually give you this one that’s real shit.
i just got here but idk about that one i think u should add a fact check or some shit
@barackObama just fucking confirmed it. get off my thread if you can't read, roxy.
what is wrong with u obama is not a valid fact chekc wtf
HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW THAT??? IT'S BARACK THE FUCKING OBAMA.