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[BEGIN MESSAGE] [ACTION:QUERY] iz it n0t intimidating having tth0ze eyez 0n y0u? [END MESSAGE]
|| STOP ME IF YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE... ((OOC INFO)) || Name: SATURN. JUST SATURN. Positing any other name may result in fines and/or persecution. Age: 28 sweeps Alternian-born. Info about upbringing lost to redaction & omission. One can only assume he was raised with the strongest and purest of convictions given the end result... Left Alternia at 10 sweeps. Ping-ponged his way through being a bounty hunter, learning the art of arms dealing, artillery design, and geoclimate engineering. As per the autobiography, soon after was an encounter and kidnap by an exiled seadweller ship, the cause of his facial scar, the ship's unfortunate demise, and the birth of his dream of being Alternia's Hero. Several things happened in quick succession: - Returns to Alternia & arranges a meeting with HIC. - His proudest work, the satellite Zip It, paralyzes and kills G'lbglyob using a vast electric charge into the deepest oceans. - Orphaning is rendered defunct. The last troll to hold its title, lost in a whimper to artificial obscurity. - Traditional hemospectrum customs are outlawed, allowing for upward economic mobility...and upward cullings. Saturn nestles himself as the champion of retribution. HIC remains untouched. - Saturn Interstellar Corporation is appointed Alternia's economic pusher-beat, public relations, and bloody enforcer. Life is very different on this Alternia. The rest you will just have to find out zz;] Notable features: Lionfish stripes, venomous spines, premature white streak, red double scar through face from a plasma torch, dry skin & horns, tacky gills, bad asthma. Idiosyncracies: Unscrupulous moral backbone, chauvanistic tyrant, answers only to what he feels the universe owes him, OBNOXIOUS, twitchy trigger finger, thin skin, obsessive-compulsive hysterical sadist, thinks Alternian sociopolitical movements are a fine tool to sharpen his own self-importance on. Metatextually, the mun's Freudian chew toy. REFS BY MOI: https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/0aac2ad44755.jpg https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/58141739906c.jpg